December -- 75 Word Writing Challenge -- VICTORY TO VICTORIA SILVERWOLF!

[Phyrebrat]

Rules:


Write a story inspired by the chosen theme and genre in no more than 75 words, not including the title.


ONE entry per person
NO links, commentary or extraneous material in the posts, please -- the stories must stand on their own​

All stories Copyright 2014 by their respective authors,
who grant the Chronicles Network the non-exclusive right to publish them here


The complete rules can be found at Rules for the Writing Challenges



Contest ends at 11:59 pm GMT, December 23 2014

Voting Ends at 11:59 pm GMT, December 28 2014​

You do not have to submit a story in order to vote --
in fact, we encourage all Chrons members to take part in choosing a winner


The Magnificent Prize:

The Dignified Congratulations/Grovelling Admiration of Your Peers
and the challenge of choosing the next month's theme and genre

​

Theme: The Festive Season

Genre: Hardboiled/Noir ​

 

[Zoe Mackay]

The Simple Art of Traffic Law Violation

It was manpower shortages, and not my liaison with the Chief’s wife, that led me to working Traffic that December night.

I dragged the latest customer up before the sergeant, as keen to be there as he was.

“Speeding, driving under the influence, driving without a licence or insurance, driving carelessly: specifically, attempting to park on a roof.”

His name implied he was a German immigrant. I knew I hadn’t seen the last of him.

 

[willwallace]

Elementary



“But Holmes, there was no ingress or egress possible to this room. How did the perpetrator manage it?”


"How often have I said to you, Watson, that when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth? Observe the partially eaten cookies, the empty glass which once contained milk. The small red fibers and white hair caught on the fireplace mantle clinch it.”


“The jolly fat man has struck again.”

 

[holland]

The Combinatorialist

"Combinatorialist? What does that even mean, Chief?"

"Our guy must visit a hundred million homes in two dozen time zones across the globe in one night. Even with his stardust antimatter reactor, he needs someone to consider all possible combinations and calculate the most optimal route. That's what our friend was doing when we got him.“

"I guess being caught was not one of the combinations he took into account".

 

[Ashleyne]

WRAP RIP MERRILY AND DIE

"Maxwell," I shouted, "Maxine, come open your presents."

My albino twins sprinted into the room, wide smiles, sparkling eyes.

Under the tree, I'd sewn presents inside Detective Cropsey's organs: a laptop poking within an abdomen, a mobile phone in the lung and other nice surprises; payback for shooting Benny 'Bugeyes', my husband.

Detective Cropsey screamed like a monkey when my twins tore him open, blood spraying their white hair.

His eyes looked familiar... somewhat bugly...

 

[Juliana]

Down at the Polar Espresso

My mood was winter bleak. I had a warm cup of coffee and an ice-cold case. And the Big Guy wanted answers.

But the elves were high on mistletoe and Rudolph wasn’t talking.

I pushed aside my ginger-spiced brew, eggnog headache raging. If I didn’t figure out fast who was naughty and who was nice, I’d be facing coal in my stocking again.

Looked like my bells were good and jingled.

 

[Remedy]

Hunting Frost

Chicago. Winter.

Prostitutes shivered beneath streetlamps, waiting. Nobody wanted the touch of icy fingers.

They say that’s what he used; icy fingers. Been on his trail for months.

The first girl, Candy, frozen solid when I found her. Almost heard the scream petrified on her lips.

The second, Holly, her cigarette still smoked in the ashtray. Too late.

Emmanuelle’s place, I sat in dark corner. Crystal ferns bloomed on the windowpane.

You’re mine now, Jack.

 

[Jo Zebedee]

RED HOT

I'd been here before. Clothes strewn over the bed, boxes upended on shelves, ripped paper covering the floor from wall to wall. After fourteen years, desperate measures were needed.

"Kids," I growled, and pointed past the snow-dusted sill to the Christmas Eve sky. "Tidy your room. Or I light the fire and send the Fat Man ho-ho-hoing back up the chimney."

It worked, like a chocolate-coated treat from a corner candy store.

 

[Glen]

The Big Shop

It had been a slow day. But the Princess changed that with a list. A list as long as her legs.
I hit the sidewalk.
One dive after another, shelling out dough to cheap hoods that belong in the big house.
Now this chiseller wants a C-note for a dead bird. It doesn’t add up.
I still need to hit the bootlegger for the seasonal hooch.
The Princess and me both deserve a nightcap.

 

[Teresa Edgerton]

A One-Way Ticket to Paradise​

I knew that dame was trouble.

She sang in a dive called "The Inferno," but her name was Angel. It suited her: golden hair, creamy skin. Sometimes, I swear, I saw a flutter of white wings.

Christmas Eve, I kissed her.

Everything I'd done, every little cheat and swindle, played through my mind like an old movie. I wanted to bawl like a baby.

It changes you, kissing angels. I knew that dame was trouble.

 

[farntfar]

Snow on!

It was snowing, when Sellers last looked out of the diner, and the frost was cruel.
“Hey Steve! Gimme a pizza with everything on,” he called. “A watchamacallit. A Steven’s feast! Deep and crispy.”
“Aw! Look at this poor homeless bum out there gathering garbage to burn. It breaks my heart."
"Make that to go, Steve, and some wine. Nobody should live like that at Christmas.
I’m gonna watch this poor sod swallow some heat!”

 

[Talysia]

The Light-fingered Lover

Not one, but five. Five gold rings, stolen on this; the fifth day of Christmas. It's laughable, really. My gut tells me that it was one of those dancin' ladies, but I have to go through the motions. Maybe it was some beau tryin' to gather goodies for his sweetheart. I don't know. Could be trouble.

I'd better investigate this quietly. I don't want the local Lords leapin' all over the place.

 

[ratsy]

‘Up on the Housetop’

He left his calling card everywhere he went - presents under the kid’s trees.

He was a sicko, tormenting families around the world until he fell for the bait. I knew a guy on the inside; had my name added to his ‘list’.

Just like clockwork, he slid down my chimney, defying physics. He claims he did it for the children, but I know a creep when I see one.

No more hiding on Christmas.

 

[Alex The G and T]

A Death for the Rest of Us

I flicked my half-smoked butt into spilt meatloaf.

The room was tossed like last night’s eggnog and gin.

The dead guy had more holes in him than a donut shop. Someone had given him the shaft with an aluminum pole.

If he’d grievances in him; they were getting plenty of air.

Someone, clearly, got too worked up over the “Feats of Strength.”

Some people really need to stick with more traditional sorts of merriment.

 

[Starbeast]

A Visit From An Injured Santa​

"You ok Santa?"

"I'm fine kid. Thanks for letting me in."

"I prayed for you to visit me. My dad works late and my mom's sick."

"Here. This will help."

"Wow."

"James?! Who's here?", she saw a red blur outside the window.

"Santa. He gave me money."

"$800,000!!! Santa's..real? God, bless him."

Overhearing on a fire escape, the red leather clad, blind vigilante known as Daredevil, smiled. "Mobster's money, in the right hands."

 

[Cat's Cradle]

A Present for Joey

“Merry Christmas!” I down the bourbon, then look around the smoky bar. Nothing but drunks.

I sold my gun yesterday to buy presents for Joey.. No. I sold it for booze. That’s the sorta bum father he has.

The plastered broad by me hears my life story, even how I beat on Joey. “Poor boy’s got no chance! Get ‘way from him!”

So I leave town; it’s the only gift I ever gave that kid.

 

[Kerrybuchanan]

Fairy Tale of Tatooin (with apologies to a certain Irish group)


It’s Christmas Eve, Darth,

On the Death Star

Obi Wan said to me,

Won't see another one

And then he disappeared

Leaving a pile of rags

I put my sword away

And dreamed about you


You Gungan

You Tuscan

You son of Sebulba

You’re a fat Jedi’s a**e

With a black

Shiny mask


And the boys of Endor’s eewok choir

Were singing Wookiee-love

And the droids are bleeping

Out for Christmas day.

 

[SciFine]

Snow

Dakota Jones finally reached the end of her sidewalk, snow shovel in hand. She admired her job well done.

Then the wind hit her face. Followed by the snowflakes.

She looked up shivering and said, "too cold," before putting her shovel away. She entered the house that she alone lived in. Some time later she peered out her front window. Seeing the snow-covered sidewalk. Adding insult to injury. She said tepidly,"this stupid country.”

 

[Bowler1]

Santa Claus is comin’ to town

I killed every reindeer as he tried to escape.
It wasn’t a pretty sight, with blood and guts for miles around.
But after so long, I had him, handcuffed and in custody.
I read out the charges.

‘Breaking and entering on a global scale.’
‘Reckless flouting of airspace rules while under the influence.’
‘Maintaining a list of vulnerable minors and voyeurism bordering on paedophilia.’
‘What do you have to say, Santa?’

‘You were always bad.’

 

[reiver33]

On The Outside, Looking In

Chicago. Winter.

I was doing penance for killing the fat man last time out – but if you give the Naughty List to Jack Frost then don’t be surprised if I make some permanent deletions.

With Death riding shotgun I’d been introducing persistent offenders to Mister Webley and his Six Reprimands. That whole ‘icy hands’ schlock is just urban myth, but great for my reputation as Wonderland enforcer.

Christmas is sick and I’m the remedy.

Enjoy.