Poem: Graduation

[SDNess]

Influenced by a Derek Walcott poem. Dunno if it worked or not.

Graduation

“The ceremony was wonderful.”
“’Sure was.”
His arm stretched around her shoulder,
pulling her closer, they collided as they walked.

“Houser’s speech was touching.” I remembered
so much – all those memories.
The clouds didn’t move. Copious they were, blocking
the sun’s rays. It was refreshing.

“Yeah, the good times,” she mused.
The clouds spoke for all recollections.
They were a testimony.

Those days of school, guarded by the
Principal’s words, “Education is
what survives when everything
else is forgotten.”

Life might have seemed hard…but it was easy.
It was just a glimpse.

Work and study: derivates and integrals.
Exercise and practice: Repeats 1000’s and ‘Rhapsody in Blue’
Fun and love: the fervent glances—their coup d'oeil.

Resting in the blue sky, the clouds seemed
parched, no longer milky.
Their moisture absorbed by the
audience’s eyes.

For Katy and Michael, Brokaw’s words played
true, “think of it as your ticket to change the world.”
They continued across the field, away from the grass,
to the mud. Their hands clasped and squeezed.

The rest were still dwelling at the tent.
Desperate to savor their last moment’s in
the Elysian Fields.

Every so often I wake up, alone,
Desiring, begging, pleading for your presence.
Whether physical or vocal or visual, a dilute
memory is not enough as we begin our dash
from the Fringe. This recluse will only
become more potent. A lone river without its
estuary flows to the ocean is not complete.

Once more Michael looked up.
They were now near the car.
A breeze was growing and the
clouds were beginning to move.

 

[Foxbat]

Well, I'm no expert but I liked it (a lot).

I'm not sure quite what it is. It seems to be a poem but it also seems to be a fragment of a short story masquerading as a poem. Also, there are certain verses that hold the observational aspect normally found in Haiku. I loved the last verse and wouldn't change a word of it.


His arm stretched around her shoulder,
pulling her closer, they collided as they walked.

Here I would put:

His arm stretched around her shoulder,
pulling her closer. They collided as they walked.

As you can see - a very minor change.

I'm unaware of what you tried to achieve here and I don't know how you feel about it but, if I were you, I'd be quite pleased

 

[SDNess]

Thanks a lot. Yes, a lot of people have said it's more like a short story than a poem, but I'm calling it a poem. I agree with the change.

You say "you're unaware of what I tried to achieve" -- does this mean you're a little confused after reading it?

 

[Foxbat]

No.

I was referring more to the style. I wasn't sure if you deliberately set out to blend short story and poem or if this was just a natural occurence within its own evolution. Hope that makes a little sense

 

[Lacedaemonian]

Very interesting poem mate. Sometimes you have more freedom with poetry, prose just kill the beauty of words.