Describing Emotions

[Yeoman]

Oh oh! Posted this in the wrong forum (I think), I meant for this to be posted with in Aspiring writers, not within the workshop. I apologise.

"Hi, I sort of feel silly writing this, don't know why, but I do.



Anyway, I was wondering if anyone had any ideas/tips/examples of how to describe an characters emotions, and by that I mean thier facial expressions, and how they change.

I mean, for example, when someone is happy, they're liable to smile, and their eyes might seem brighter, or more alive. But but how would you describe a smile, and how it changes when a person gets angry or sad. Also, what about describing peoples voices.

I want to get better at dropping, (more)subtle clues to what emotions my characters are feeling, or how they say something, without writing 'they said with a hint or anger', 'they were furious', 'she asked sternly', 'he snapped' or 'they smiled'.

Sorry if this seems silly, but I'm sort of a 'noob' when it comes to writing."

 

[jackokent]

Hi Yeoman

I find it hard to describe facial expressions and usually also find it tedious to read about to many of them. I usually prefer people's emotions to be described by another character, if you see what I mean. The effect on the other character describes the emotion ie "John flinched at the anger in her face" ( a rubbish example I admit - it's been a long day).

As your characters start getting thier own habits the reader shouold be able to tell what mood they are in but this in itself can be tedious if it gets as repetative as Jordan's endless braid pulling.(Sorry if you haven't read Wheel of Time)

However, in my view there is also nothing wrong in mentioning the odd smile or frown. It's all down to context. For a mega creepy or surly character to suddenly smile might be a major thing and worth a sentence on it's own.

The main thing is not to feel silly asking questions like this. It's a great post and is likely to spark of an excellent round of discussions.

 

[The Curious Orange]

I tend to abide by the old rule that the adverb is the enemy of the verb. Where it's my POV character talking I would say something like:

"No it isn't," he said, allowing a frosty tone to enter his voice.

If it were another character speaking, I would say:

"No it isn't," Susan said, her voice as cold as ice.

Or even:

"No it isn't." Susan's voice froze him to the core.

In terms of how to convey that someone has said something angrily, or humourously, etc, then I would suggest that you look at the dialogue itself. If the words are right, then the character's intention and emotions should be crystal clear to the reader without the need for adverbs.
eg:

"What are you looking at?" she asked, angrily.
can easily be changed to:
"What the hell are you looking at, you jerk?"

Easier said than done, though...

 

[Yeoman]

Thanks for your comments, they've made things clearer for me.

 

[quixotic]

Anyway, I was wondering if anyone had any ideas/tips/examples of how to describe an characters emotions, and by that I mean thier facial expressions, and how they change.

I mean, for example, when someone is happy, they're liable to smile, and their eyes might seem brighter, or more alive. But but how would you describe a smile, and how it changes when a person gets angry or sad.

People sometimes hug when they're happy. I've nown a few lasses that hug. When they're mad, they tend to ball their fists or their body looks tenser. It's subtle differences which you need to look out for.

As for people gettin sad... they tend to shrug, look downward, answer with minimal sentences, or their eyes may fill with tears.

 

[daisybee]

I think it is a hard part of writing a character too-howver when I first came on here someone, (possibly Leisha -bless her helpful heart), made a comment about showing not telling, which has really stuck with me since..

So now, I try to do that, and its easier with practise.

Example-

Clive was glaring at him and Jeff shrank back hastily, eyes sliding between the door and his brothers large build.
" You and I are finished Jeff. I no longer have a brother."
Jeff's eyes widened, his mouth falling open, but no words came before Clive turned away, shoulders slumped. Clive's hand lingered on the door knob, his frame immovable for long moments. Jeff saw his brothers hesitation, and tried to speak but the door was suddenly wrenched open, and Clive left the room without looking back. It slammed with a resounding bang, and Jeff jumped as the sound echoed the room.
He sank into a chair and put his head in his hands, wondering what the hell had just happened.

Okay well that's just a rough idea, and probably isn't a great example-but hopefully you see a little of what I mean.

 

[Teresa Edgerton]

As several people have noted indirectly, body language is one very good way to indicate a character's emotions.

Also, in a viewpoint character, the physical effects that other people can't see, like a pounding pulse, or the way your stomach feels all twisted up when you're tense. Although there are only a limited number of these, and when it comes time to edit or rewrite a longer work you may find yourself muttering as you read, "Oh no, not her stomach again."

 

[flynx]

"Avoid descriptions."

"Avoid descriptions?" He scratched his head. "All of them?"

"Most of them."

"Which ones?" his brow rose quizically

"The ones that you don't need."

 

[Saltheart]

Don't describe emotions head on. Ever. Let the reader feel the emotion through actions.


"'Dammit!' he yelled, clenching his hand as he recoiled from the stove. He immediately whipped his head to the door, glowering at it. He knew those knocks. They were all too familiar.

Twisting the stove off, he stomped off towards the door and wrenched it open, staring outside as if daring it ruin his day any further.

"Hi--" began Sparky.

He slammed the door in his face, being extra careful to break his nose."

 

[Teresa Edgerton]

But beware of going over the top with emotional reactions -- this tends to cheapen them over the course of the story.

And there is nothing you should always or should never do. There are, on the other hand, a lot of things you should avoid doing often, and telling what a character feels is one of them. Even so, sometimes subtlety is best, and a simple statement of what a character's emotional state is at a particular moment can be far more effective than a big melodramatic scene.

It takes time and practice, and trial and error, to find the right balance -- and when you've found that out for one story, you usually have to begin all over again for the next.

 

[Saltheart]

Of course I'm exaggerating when I say never or ever. There are no absolutes.

What I mean though is that a majority of the time, maybe 89% of the time, characters get emotional in response to essential plot points. Being essential plot points, most of them have to be dramatized so it's "live" in front of readers and carries full weight. Only when it's non-essential or you use other tricks (rhythm; imagery, perhaps) to let the reader feel the emotion should you resort to being lazy enough to tell us bluntly. Or perhaps the emotion itself is a lead-up to something else and it would be a waste of time to follow through on it instead of moving forward.

Direct author to reader contact very often breaks the fictive dream. Far better is to break up what the reader must know and mix it in so it speaks for itself while the story pans ahead. Otherwise you end up with an info dump, or worse, a Dan Brown flashback.

There are no laws, only working principles.

 

[Teresa Edgerton]

Direct author to reader contact very often breaks the fictive dream.

Not if you are writing in first person, and not with certain narrative styles.