The Bloated One
Well-Known Member
Dear One & All,
I had my first draft synopsis mauled on 'another' site, but on reflection that wasn't such a bad thing.
Here is my latest draft. If Chris, our resident pedant has time to weave his usual magic I would be delighted. All those pesky comas that have a life of their own. . .
Please feel free to offer advice and suggestions, I have a thickish skin (!)
* * *
The Adventures of Tarquin Jenkins
Synopsis
Every Friday 13th, TARQUIN JENKINS a fifteen-year-old boy jumps off a narrow boat to visit dead people.
The owner of the boat, JEREMIAH CAVENDISH, an ex-wrestler, worm raiser and lock keeper guards time holes along the Oxford Canal. He takes Tarquin to witness the Great Fire of London but instead, they land in 1671. Their friendship is severely tested when Tarquin nearly dies saving the Crown Jewels. They meet Charles II, Jeremiah is knighted and they have a riotous evening with Samuel Pepys and his Royal Society friends. The next morning, looking through Pepys’s library, Tarquin is stunned to find an ancient, unreadable journal with his initials and date of birth on the inside cover.
Back in 2009, Tarquin deciphers part of the journal before his aunt breaks the translator, leaving a part translation in another, unknown language. Tarquin’s mysterious GREAT AUNT POLIDORI arrives and tells him his time travels are part of his grooming from the future by JULIUS RIGSWORTH, the Controller of the British Intergalactic Foreign Service (BIFS). She takes the journal but misses the part translation.
Arriving at Jeremiah’s narrow boat, Tarquin disturbs a naked man stealing a book. He is the famous philosopher, Nostradamus who, after stealing a time chair, roves through time and space occasionally appearing at coordinates pre-programmed into the chair.
Tarquin meets Jules in 2340 and learns that his parents were Jules’s colleagues in the BIFs. He agrees to stay and work for the BIFs. He meets RHIA COLLINS and ARCHIE McDONALD.
He returns to 2009 to pack. While in the village Tea Shop, he is attacked by a warrior race of aliens called GRIDDLEBACKS looking for the journal. Jules and the BIFs mount a rescue. Tarquin is severely injured and Rhia dies.
Back in 2340, Tarquin recovers while Jules and the others are arrested and charged with saving a life in another time. Jules gets a message to Archie; he must find GEORGIA BLADE, a renegade Space Pirate who leads a Clurichaun ‘Wreckin’ Crew’ stealing artifacts from history. They are to get evidence of the Griddlebacks at the tea-shop.
Georgia, Archie and Alice set off for 2009, but are sent off course by shadowy TIME GUARDIANS, and arrive at the Boston Tea Party. They find two Griddlebacks manipulating American history and capture them. In exchange for the Griddlebacks, charges against Jules and the others are dropped.
Tarquin learns of Rhia’s death. He is acutely aware of personal loss as his parents died when he was young. Overcome with guilt for surviving, Tarquin deciphers the part translation and finds a time amulet he can use to save Rhia.
With the team together, Jules prepares a trip to Liverpool in 1963. Griddlebacks have added a fifth Beatle to the Fab Four and the BIFs need to restore history. It is a trap, organized by Griddlebacks and a parasitic race of blood gorgers called LECHE. Only Alice, Archie and Tarquin escape back to 2340. Jules and the others are prisoners on Putrios, the Griddlebacks home planet.
Tarquin leaves his friends to save Rhia, but his Great Aunt appears and warns him that he will die if he goes back to the tea-shop. She demands he returns and saves his friends.
Tarquin galvanizes the BIFS and after an epic battle on Putrios he rescues his friends but is trapped by the Leche. If they are to survive, he must hand over the amulet, his most precious possession.
Nostradamus and a new travelling partner Leo arrive unexpectedly and scatter the Leche, before taking the amulet. In the confusion, Jethro, Alice and Archie rescue Tarquin and they escape.
The amulet is now with Nostradamus and Leonardo Da Vinci, flying through time and space.
TBO
I had my first draft synopsis mauled on 'another' site, but on reflection that wasn't such a bad thing.
Here is my latest draft. If Chris, our resident pedant has time to weave his usual magic I would be delighted. All those pesky comas that have a life of their own. . .
Please feel free to offer advice and suggestions, I have a thickish skin (!)
* * *
The Adventures of Tarquin Jenkins
Synopsis
Every Friday 13th, TARQUIN JENKINS a fifteen-year-old boy jumps off a narrow boat to visit dead people.
The owner of the boat, JEREMIAH CAVENDISH, an ex-wrestler, worm raiser and lock keeper guards time holes along the Oxford Canal. He takes Tarquin to witness the Great Fire of London but instead, they land in 1671. Their friendship is severely tested when Tarquin nearly dies saving the Crown Jewels. They meet Charles II, Jeremiah is knighted and they have a riotous evening with Samuel Pepys and his Royal Society friends. The next morning, looking through Pepys’s library, Tarquin is stunned to find an ancient, unreadable journal with his initials and date of birth on the inside cover.
Back in 2009, Tarquin deciphers part of the journal before his aunt breaks the translator, leaving a part translation in another, unknown language. Tarquin’s mysterious GREAT AUNT POLIDORI arrives and tells him his time travels are part of his grooming from the future by JULIUS RIGSWORTH, the Controller of the British Intergalactic Foreign Service (BIFS). She takes the journal but misses the part translation.
Arriving at Jeremiah’s narrow boat, Tarquin disturbs a naked man stealing a book. He is the famous philosopher, Nostradamus who, after stealing a time chair, roves through time and space occasionally appearing at coordinates pre-programmed into the chair.
Tarquin meets Jules in 2340 and learns that his parents were Jules’s colleagues in the BIFs. He agrees to stay and work for the BIFs. He meets RHIA COLLINS and ARCHIE McDONALD.
He returns to 2009 to pack. While in the village Tea Shop, he is attacked by a warrior race of aliens called GRIDDLEBACKS looking for the journal. Jules and the BIFs mount a rescue. Tarquin is severely injured and Rhia dies.
Back in 2340, Tarquin recovers while Jules and the others are arrested and charged with saving a life in another time. Jules gets a message to Archie; he must find GEORGIA BLADE, a renegade Space Pirate who leads a Clurichaun ‘Wreckin’ Crew’ stealing artifacts from history. They are to get evidence of the Griddlebacks at the tea-shop.
Georgia, Archie and Alice set off for 2009, but are sent off course by shadowy TIME GUARDIANS, and arrive at the Boston Tea Party. They find two Griddlebacks manipulating American history and capture them. In exchange for the Griddlebacks, charges against Jules and the others are dropped.
Tarquin learns of Rhia’s death. He is acutely aware of personal loss as his parents died when he was young. Overcome with guilt for surviving, Tarquin deciphers the part translation and finds a time amulet he can use to save Rhia.
With the team together, Jules prepares a trip to Liverpool in 1963. Griddlebacks have added a fifth Beatle to the Fab Four and the BIFs need to restore history. It is a trap, organized by Griddlebacks and a parasitic race of blood gorgers called LECHE. Only Alice, Archie and Tarquin escape back to 2340. Jules and the others are prisoners on Putrios, the Griddlebacks home planet.
Tarquin leaves his friends to save Rhia, but his Great Aunt appears and warns him that he will die if he goes back to the tea-shop. She demands he returns and saves his friends.
Tarquin galvanizes the BIFS and after an epic battle on Putrios he rescues his friends but is trapped by the Leche. If they are to survive, he must hand over the amulet, his most precious possession.
Nostradamus and a new travelling partner Leo arrive unexpectedly and scatter the Leche, before taking the amulet. In the confusion, Jethro, Alice and Archie rescue Tarquin and they escape.
The amulet is now with Nostradamus and Leonardo Da Vinci, flying through time and space.
TBO
