January 2011 Writing Challenge - TIEBREAKER POLL

[Culhwch]

Such a great month for entries, it's unsurprising that we've got ourselves a tied ballgame. So without further ado, the tiebreaker poll...

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What Goes Around Comes Around
by Perpetual Man

A watchmaker sits entranced by the workings of an intricate mechanism. In perfect motion the gears and springs move, hands revolve.

What does he see?

Within the synchronicity of moving time, atoms turn, there electrons circle the nucleus - within this heart protons and neutrons rotate, into the infinitesimal - the imagination - universes are born; galaxies turn within, circumferences marked by stars, around which planets orbit, where a watchmaker sits, staring at moving clockwork.

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Back Country
by digs

We collect absences: of water, crops, of Natalie now she's gone. It was all too much, she said, but she meant it was too little.

There's one day, and it repeats endlessly. Nothing new. Just the silence of a land dying beneath hard skies.

When the clouds come, I'll take Alice outside and we'll spin and spin until the red mud coats our feet and we can't tell rain from tears.

And we'll begin again.

 

[sloweye]

I have to stick with my firt vote here.

 

[Teresa Edgerton]

I have to stick with my first, too, although digs was very high on my short list.

 

[Culhwch]

My vote stays the same as well. Although they are both wonderfully written pieces, to me PM's is more description or vignette than story, and on that basis I had to unfortunately discount it first time around. Wonderfully crafted, though, all the same.

 

[TheDustyZebra]

These were my top two the first time around, and I went with digs for exactly the same reason as Cul just mentioned!

 

[Ursa major]

I stuck with my first choice, Back Country.

 

[GreenKidx]

Both very well crafted. But one made my original short list one did not... so, ill stick with that choice.

 

[StormFeather]

Congratulations to both Perpetual Man and digs - both of your stories are beautifully crafted and a joy to read.

I'd already voted for digs in the main challenge, and am sticking with that decision now.

 

[HareBrain]

Digs for me, though PM's is excellent too.

 

[Mouse]

10 each now. PM was on my short list, so just voted for him.

Congrats to both!

 

[Talysia]

Congratulations, digs and Perpetual Man! As I voted for PM the first time, I've voted the same way again.

 

[The Judge]

Good lord! This is the first time I've ever voted for someone who has won and/or got to the tie-break -- and PM was on my shortlist also. I must be getting better at this voting lark. But I agree with Cul, and my vote stays with digs.

 

[nixie]

Both excellent stories, but Digs got my vote

 

[Perpetual Man]

My vote stays the same as well. Although they are both wonderfully written pieces, to me PM's is more description or vignette than story, and on that basis I had to unfortunately discount it first time around. Wonderfully crafted, though, all the same.

To be honest when I first finished the piece I was in two minds whether to post it or not, or to try and think of another story, the reason being exactly what Cul has put here. Even after I posted every now and then I wondered whether it was truly a story.

But after a good long think I looked at it like this a: Could the piece be extended into a full short story or something longer? b: Does it have a beginning middle and end?

Perhaps there is a failing on my part - or the loss of words, but the story is on two levels, is looking at the way the watchmaker sees his job; or as it was originally, God looking down on creation, the ultimate watchmaker.

That being said I wouldn't be being honest if I did not say I still have a few doubts...

 

[paranoid marvin]

Going with my original choice Digs

 

[Parson]

I voted for Perpetual Man. In some ways his story is an illustration of his name, thing "Hippy" now --- "It perpetual, man."

 

[crys]

Sticking with my original vote (PM).

 

[Precise Calibre]

PM's reminds me very much of Terry Pratchett, so I'll have to go with this one, as I love his style.

 

[Perpetual Man]

PM's reminds me very much of Terry Pratchett, so I'll have to go with this one, as I love his style.

Wow! PC that's quite a compliment, thanks you very much, and thanks for the vote too.

Thanks to everyone for the votes, it's making this a real nailbiter and a lot of fun.

 

[Oxman]

Went with Digs on the grounds it came across as more of a story. A very close run thing though as they both really are excellent pieces of writing.