At What Point is the Thesaurus overused?

[JordanSC5]

I'm trying to sprinkle "better" words in my draft, and am using a thesaurus to help me out. How do you find the right balance between using beautiful language with less common words, and not being overbearing on the reader and taking them out of the story.

Is it okay to sprinkle these words into the story occasionally? A few words I've added recently are panacea and zenith.

 

[oddhero]

I'd have to say it depends on context, and your writing style. Are you beefing up a character's dialogue, for example, to flesh out their own traits, or are you using these words descriptively yourself? I always think that if as a reader, I'm reaching for the dictionary too often and for no great reason, then it's off-putting. That said, panacea and zenith are no problem.

 

[Alex The G and T]

Feel it. Taste it. A wordsmith loves the texture of the language.

 

[BetaWolf]

It depends. Keep in mind what a certain character would likely say. Though you can throw in some surprises, too; that is, don't be too stereotypical. English is full of usages based on class, stage of life, place of origin, and so on, particularly divided between who uses Germanic and who uses Romance words and in what contexts. This can be twisted for comedic effect, too.

 

[Glen]

I think it's good to throw in a few less commonly used words. I get a bit of a cheap thrill from reading a word I am unfamiliar with - but on the other hand might lose the drift of the story if I had to reach for the dictionary every paragraph. I'd rather have the text enriched with a word I don't know that wade through prosaic, anodyne, mainstream dross.

Sprinkle away!

 

[Boneman]

Hell, I use my thesaurus so much I'll have to give it a publishing credit...

 

[The Judge]

I use the thesaurus constantly, on the basis I have a wide vocabulary but if I had to wait for my memory to provide me with the precise word for which I'm cudgelling my brains, I'd still be on chapter 1. However, I rarely use a word with which I'm unfamiliar and never without double-checking its meaning and instances of how it's been used.

I'm a little concerned, though, that you might be doing the opposite. Using a thesaurus and a good dictionary to improve your own vocabulary is an excellent idea. (As to which, this thread might interest you http://www.sffchronicles.co.uk/forum/50858-eloquent-exotic-esoteric-please-provide-definitions.html) Sprinkling words into a story which you don't know and have never met before because they sound "better" can be a terrible mistake -- I've seen many examples of people trying to write in a more high-falutin' style, thinking it's literary, and they come a cropper because the words they've used are wrong in context.

As for how many words you can use which are unfamiliar, it's difficult to say as different readers will have different tolerances. I've seen pieces here in Critiques where some readers have pulled out words as being difficult when to me they were perfectly ordinary (thinking about it, that includes pieces of my own... ). I'm a great believer in stretching people and dropping a few unfamiliar words in, though I try and make it clear in context what they mean, but I have to confess I get annoyed when confronted by something where a lot of words aren't known to me -- I then instantly decide the arcane and esoteric are being used to show off, rather than because the words are absolutely the right ones for the story!

As for panacea and zenith, they're to me wholly unexceptional, and I wouldn't turn a hair if the words are being used correctly and by characters who would indeed know and use them.

 

[AnyaKimlin]

I also use it constantly as a writer but I use it alongside a dictionary to make sure I have the word in the right context.

As a reader I hate having to read with either book present Like The Judge I make sure the words have context so a reader can guess the meaning. I am suspicious when someone doesn't use unfamiliar/difficult words in a strong context because often it comes across like they don't know what they mean either.

I've had beta readers that have struggled with equerry, cloisters and singeing. I had to give them more explanation despite being words I use in everyday speech.

 

[Phyrebrat]

Feel it. Taste it. A wordsmith loves the texture of the language.

I want to second this sentiment. I hate the too-clinical approach to writing sometimes; often I have to go and eat a few Lovecraft shorts (eww...yuk, that sounds so wrong) just to get a wordy fix

However, it is a balancing act and the advice that you only beef up your language if it is relevant to the character, is crucial. Remember as well, as TJ says, the correct words may be wholly unexceptional in context, no matter how rarely they are heard in common conversation.

Someone said in a previous thread about voice that a writer who is trying too hard to sound...er... writerly...is horrible to read, and stands out like a wine stain.

pH

 

[chrispenycate]

My tendency is in the opposite direction. Oh, I will use a Thesaurus occasionally, to avoid a repetition or because I have a word on the tip of my brain that won't step forward to be recognised, and I just love the clictionary/thesaurus included in my laptop so I don't have to get up and search for the Chambers 20th century, but more often in straightforward conversation I find myself looking at a blank expression as someone I'm talking too hits a vocabulary limit. ('Course, it might be due to my tendency to structure sentences like that in casual conversation, too).

So, need for a program that beefs down words like perigee or phoneme (but they say exactly what I want to get across!) and try and remember that, to avoid red wine staining you pour white wine onto the spill.

Chilled, of course.

 

[Toby Frost]

Personally, I think fairly early on. While there are concepts that do need a long or obscure word to be properly expressed, most of the time a fairly small vocabulary is required. However, it depends on the circumstances. If I was writing a story about mountaineering, say, I would probably end up using peak, summit and maybe zenith to describe the top of the mountain, to avoid repeating words that are sufficiently unusual to stand out. But it's really down to whatever's appropriate.

 

[Teresa Edgerton]

I'd say that if you are using the Thesaurus to find words that you didn't already know, so that you can use them right then, then at that point you are using the Thesaurus too much -- even once is too much, if that's the way you are doing it.

I use it to remind myself of words I already know and would probably have thought of eventually (once you are over fifty or so, "eventually" can take a long time), and quite often to jog my memory when I am trying to remember a particular word but I can't quite dredge it up out of the depths. It is usually a quite simple word. The less common words come when my mind is afire with inspiration, so there is no need for memory jogging.

Sometimes I go looking for synonyms for a word I am using too often in a scene ... and discover that there are, in fact, no synonyms that are close enough to what I want to say, which is why I didn't think of them in the first place. The word "splash" is one that comes to mind. I wrote that scene thirty years ago, and still remember how frustrated I was.

 

[ZombieWife]

I use the online thesaurus fervently, but, I never use a word unless I know what it means and how to use it in context. I have the vocabulary, but sometimes your brain doesn't want to give you that PERFECT word. It's probably already exerting itself doing other things (like drafting and pushing through most of what the internal editor has to say).

Suffice to say, I use it more on rewriting than drafting unless it's really driving me crazy.

But, I agree with so much of what's been said here already. If the thesaurus word doesn't match your tone and current style, you're going to look like a gobble-headed chicken stick if you start using replacement words willy nilly.

 

[Christopher Lee]

I don't use a thesaurus. Not because I have a wicked vocabulary or anything like that, but because I don't want to make the same mistake that The Judge thinks you could be doing. I use the first word that comes to my mind and that's that. Sprinkling a bunch of big, funny words throughout your story because they sound better is a terrible idea. You come off sounding worse than you did with your smaller word because nine times out of ten you've used a big pretty word completely out of context.

The only time I use a thesaurus or a dictionary is while I'm reading, and by that method I learn new words. Occasionally I'll look a few up when doing dialogue for a very intelligent character, but very few of my stories possess intelligent characters. I write what I know, and with it my vocabulary is what it is. Take it or leave it, bud.

 

[Phyrebrat]

...try and remember that, to avoid red wine staining you pour white wine onto the spill.

Chilled, of course.

Of course... and my preference is for Marlborough sauvignon; it works so well.

pH

 

[The Judge]

Sometimes I go looking for synonyms for a word I am using too often in a scene ... and discover that there are, in fact, no synonyms that are close enough to what I want to say, which is why I didn't think of them in the first place. The word "splash" is one that comes to mind. I wrote that scene thirty years ago, and still remember how frustrated I was.

That's the point I start inventing/carefully misusing words in the hope everyone thinks I'm so well-read and intelligent the words must be genuine and/or correct!

(I've used "plash" before now, though, unfortunately, it looks like a mis-type rather than a real word. And in a page full of splashes it's probably not different enough to warrant its use.)

 

[Mirannan]

As others have said, using unusual words in dialogue is permissible only if used by characters who are already established as being likely to use such words. To take perhaps typical examples; if someone heavily based on Tolkein (the author himself) is talking then exotic words might be in order; for someone who dropped out of high school, perhaps not. As usual, if there is an actual reason for someone unexpectedly using exotic words...

In description and/or narrative, as long as the use of exotic words fits your style then fine - providing, of course, that you use them correctly. There are extremes to this that might be inadvisable; Stephen Donaldson, arguably, goes too far.

I would like to widen the discussion slightly, to include neologisms. These can be either words used with a new meaning, or completely new words. The problem here isn't the same as with existing words; it's making their meaning clear without turning your story into a dictionary. Whether it's in dialogue or narrative doesn't really matter, in this case.

I'll give an example from my own poor scribblings. I came up with what I think is a new word; at least I'd never seen it anywhere else. The word is "yoctotech". Probably very unclear in its meaning, until I tell you that it cropped up in a discussion about the smallest scale at which technology can work.

 

[Teresa Edgerton]

(I've used "plash" before now, though, unfortunately, it looks like a mis-type rather than a real word. And in a page full of splashes it's probably not different enough to warrant its use.)

I had characters in a marsh, splashing through the water. I don't think it would have worked if they had "plashed." All very well for a waterfall, but for human beings ...

I would like to widen the discussion slightly, to include neologisms. These can be either words used with a new meaning, or completely new words.

I don't invent words in the same way that you do, but there is a language of magic in the books I am currently working on, and there are names for different kinds of spells. For instance, béanath is a charm of blessing, shibeath a healing or protective spell, and waethas is a spell of binding or enslaving. I translate the first time, and after that really all readers need to remember is that it's a type of spell and the context shows what it's for and whether it's white magic or blackest sorcery.

Invent too many words and you have to include your own dictionary or glossary. Or ... hmmm ... how about a thesaurus made up of words from imaginary languages? I don't know if that is an intriguing thought or a frightening one.

 

[ZombieWife]

I would like to widen the discussion slightly, to include neologisms. These can be either words used with a new meaning, or completely new words. The problem here isn't the same as with existing words; it's making their meaning clear without turning your story into a dictionary. Whether it's in dialogue or narrative doesn't really matter, in this case.

I think it depends. When Kaylee says, "That's real shiny, Capt'n," on Firefly, we're getting the new meaning pretty quick.

 

[JordanSC5]

I use the thesaurus constantly, on the basis I have a wide vocabulary but if I had to wait for my memory to provide me with the precise word for which I'm cudgelling my brains, I'd still be on chapter 1. However, I rarely use a word with which I'm unfamiliar and never without double-checking its meaning and instances of how it's been used.

I'm a little concerned, though, that you might be doing the opposite. Using a thesaurus and a good dictionary to improve your own vocabulary is an excellent idea. (As to which, this thread might interest you http://www.sffchronicles.co.uk/forum/50858-eloquent-exotic-esoteric-please-provide-definitions.html) Sprinkling words into a story which you don't know and have never met before because they sound "better" can be a terrible mistake -- I've seen many examples of people trying to write in a more high-falutin' style, thinking it's literary, and they come a cropper because the words they've used are wrong in context.

As for how many words you can use which are unfamiliar, it's difficult to say as different readers will have different tolerances. I've seen pieces here in Critiques where some readers have pulled out words as being difficult when to me they were perfectly ordinary (thinking about it, that includes pieces of my own... ). I'm a great believer in stretching people and dropping a few unfamiliar words in, though I try and make it clear in context what they mean, but I have to confess I get annoyed when confronted by something where a lot of words aren't known to me -- I then instantly decide the arcane and esoteric are being used to show off, rather than because the words are absolutely the right ones for the story!

As for panacea and zenith, they're to me wholly unexceptional, and I wouldn't turn a hair if the words are being used correctly and by characters who would indeed know and use them.

Thank you for the excellent feedback. So say I looked at the thread you pointed to and put all those words in a document. If throughout my text I found a good place for them that fit contextually, you think that would be a good addition for my writing. For example, I know what egregious means, but it is just one of those words that maybe doesn't come to the top of my head due to the other mechanisms trying to push the story forward.

I think I am trying to find other words that will make the writing more lively, but I not trying to be high-brow. For example to me panacea and zenith aren't oftenly used in my conversation, but I think they are good words that could be included to broaden the language in my story. To you, you said they don't necessarily impress you, so if they are used correct contextually, then you would be okay with them?

I think these two quotes from you explain what I want to do well. What would be your recommendation moving forward? Double check context, and make sure the word flows and fits?

"I believe we should cherish this richness. We should be alive to the nuance and colour and association which every word brings with it."

"Words which are strange, beautiful or intriguing. And because not all of the words will be familiar to all of us, they should come with a brief definition and an example of usage."