Punctuation problem

[Hex]

Hello, everyone.

Is this okay with a comma?

[FONT=&quot]

The second body lands on top of the first, the skirt ridden up a bit so her ankles are exposed.[/FONT]

(I think it is, but when I was editing I found I'd written it with a semi and now I'm swithering(*)).


(*) I declare today Obscure Scottish Words day! Huzzah!

 

[Culhwch]

I think it's fine. Definitely don't think it earns the semi-colon as is.

 

[Hex]

Thank you, Cul.

Right. Enough work-evasion -- I'll go back to the ms without any more excuses to faff.

 

[HareBrain]

Comma is fine. Semi-colon would cause gnashing of teeth.

 

[jastius]

if you could separate the two phrases into two separate sentances, then you jam the ideas together with a semi-colon. If one or both ideas are not independent clauses, then a comma is used to hook them together..

 

[Hex]

Thanks, you guys.

You're absolutely right. I don't know what I was thinking (pathological fear of comma splicing, maybe).

 

[The Judge]

The comma is fine. The "ridden" on the other hand...

I think you're using "ridden" as an adjective, but for me it doesn't work. For me, you need "having ridden" or, if it's still happening, "riding".

 

[Hex]

"Having ridden" would be correct in this context, I agree.

 

[Boneman]

I'm a comma supporter. Because you've used present tense in 'lands' would her skirt rides up a bit, not work? Probably not, otherwise it might appear the whole thing is present tense...

 

[paranoid marvin]

I'm happy with the comma, but not with the 'a bit' which is unneccessary (in my opinion).


The second body lands on top of the first, the skirt ridden up exposing her ankles

 

[Hex]

You're right. That's a much tighter version. Thanks