Coast
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Jun 2, 2016
- Messages
- 239
We have a three way tie, here are the stories.
Conclusion of Jayne Krakov's Newscast: To Interview a Superhero
“Any regrets, Captain?”
“Look, we tried to help humanity. My Enhanco Ray wasn’t perfect. Instead of amplifying our inherent abilities – strength, intelligence, agility – it supercharged the individual’s prevailing dominant health characteristic—”
“With often appalling results. Watch this clip…”
“Phlagh...PHLAGH...”
*SPLEWSH*
“That was?”
“Phlegm...phlegming criminals.”
“Repulsive. What of national security concerns? You’ve one foreign teammate, the Norwegian superhero.”
“Sadly, Fjart passed while battling the traitorous Halitosis.”
“Condolences. But there's happier news – I hear you’re marrying?”
“I’m blushing! Yes, Blush and I are engaged.”
“Captain Incontinence – leader of The Unfortunates – thank you.”
“You’re welcome, Jayne. Uh...sorry about the couch.”
A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S COMEDY OF ERRORS, AS YOU LIKE IT
Phoolio:
Night’s sable cloak is thrown o’er heaven’s glory;
My sister, have you come with news or story?
Phoolia:
Fear not, my brother; yea, e’en more than brother,
Twins being, by nature’s whim, each other’s other.
Phoolio:
Speak, then, my mirror, swift as airy spirit!
If word has come of Psillia, let me hear it!
Phoolia:
To that fair maiden did I go, as bid,
Within a young lad’s guise, slyly hid,
To hunt, as hawk does sparrow,
And bring the truth to thee. Faithful arrow
Have I been, her affections to uncover.
Alas! She thinks me now her lover!
Hell is spelt D-M-V
First, they got my hair color wrong. When I waited in the hour-long line a second time to get my license fixed, they misspelled my name and listed my date of birth in the wrong month.
On the third try, they got my species wrong. I didn't even know that was possible. I didn't even know that dogs could drive cars.
On my fourth try, I was given a recipe book. On the fifth, I received nothing but a firm handshake.
I asked the clerk if he thought this was funny.
"No, ma'am. There's absolutely nothing funny about mistakes."
Conclusion of Jayne Krakov's Newscast: To Interview a Superhero
“Any regrets, Captain?”
“Look, we tried to help humanity. My Enhanco Ray wasn’t perfect. Instead of amplifying our inherent abilities – strength, intelligence, agility – it supercharged the individual’s prevailing dominant health characteristic—”
“With often appalling results. Watch this clip…”
“Phlagh...PHLAGH...”
*SPLEWSH*
“That was?”
“Phlegm...phlegming criminals.”
“Repulsive. What of national security concerns? You’ve one foreign teammate, the Norwegian superhero.”
“Sadly, Fjart passed while battling the traitorous Halitosis.”
“Condolences. But there's happier news – I hear you’re marrying?”
“I’m blushing! Yes, Blush and I are engaged.”
“Captain Incontinence – leader of The Unfortunates – thank you.”
“You’re welcome, Jayne. Uh...sorry about the couch.”
A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S COMEDY OF ERRORS, AS YOU LIKE IT
Phoolio:
Night’s sable cloak is thrown o’er heaven’s glory;
My sister, have you come with news or story?
Phoolia:
Fear not, my brother; yea, e’en more than brother,
Twins being, by nature’s whim, each other’s other.
Phoolio:
Speak, then, my mirror, swift as airy spirit!
If word has come of Psillia, let me hear it!
Phoolia:
To that fair maiden did I go, as bid,
Within a young lad’s guise, slyly hid,
To hunt, as hawk does sparrow,
And bring the truth to thee. Faithful arrow
Have I been, her affections to uncover.
Alas! She thinks me now her lover!
Hell is spelt D-M-V
First, they got my hair color wrong. When I waited in the hour-long line a second time to get my license fixed, they misspelled my name and listed my date of birth in the wrong month.
On the third try, they got my species wrong. I didn't even know that was possible. I didn't even know that dogs could drive cars.
On my fourth try, I was given a recipe book. On the fifth, I received nothing but a firm handshake.
I asked the clerk if he thought this was funny.
"No, ma'am. There's absolutely nothing funny about mistakes."
