BcRedneck
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Sep 23, 2021
- Messages
- 79
I'm now writing the third and last of a series, I guess. I self-published the second. (I think there are rules against me posting its name or link so I won't unless someone tells me differently) I plan to rewrite most of the first once the third is complete and release it last. I think my beginnings and ends need work, so I'm going to post the beginning of the third now to see what you all think.
Please note this was just written a half hour ago and may include a few typos.
1.
Alora awoke from another strange dream, she had many since the day Simon died back on her homeworld. She well understood them to have meaning. She knew until she destroyed Alan’s lab she would have more. Alora got out of bed and left the room. Dave was in the kitchen pouring a cup of coffee. She had been staying with Simon’s friend Dave and his wife Nara for four months. After Simon’s and Nara’s dad’s deaths in the canyon, Alora had gone to her hometown left her buggy with her uncle, and left her homeworld behind. She only half understood why the lab and it’s technology needed to be destroyed, but she had an almost instinctual drive to do it. It could be the minds held in the vast network. She had told them she was going to put an end to them herself and no argument was made. It would mean putting an end to Simon as well, this bothered her greatly, yet she needed it to be done.
After passing through the gateway into the center she had gone to Dave and Nara’s apartment and told the news. Dave and Nara had been shocked by the death of Simon, but indifferent to the news that Vacks Nara’s own father had been killed as well. Vacks was the leader of half his world. A man who believed power was only obtained through fear, he took great care of his own people but reacted with cruel brutality to anyone who he perceived to make him appear weak or threaten his rule. His actions in life had left millions dead and destroyed the lives of many including his own daughter Ashra. Her mind had come back to her after Simon’s mind had entered the network. It would appear Simon had accomplished his original goal, but it cost him his body, only his mind remained now trapped in a mass network of computers no living man understood.
The technology itself was a network of computers running the center and on some of the worlds linked to it. To many people, it was just another thing to make life easy, a way to control computers with thought. They used it for menial tasks such as ordering food, buying clothing, and controlling the simple electric carts to get around the center. Just another novelty. No one really cared about what it was really capable of, no known person understood how it worked Alen Aiken put as much effort into keeping the true nature of it, as creating it in the first place. As long as no one could control it and it kept doing the mundane tasks it now did no one cared.
Very few knew his mind or the minds of others still lived on inside of it. Very few knew it had the power no only to read, but modify a human mind. Very few even cared enough to find out exactly what it all was. And only one of them knew it needed to be stopped.
2.
Alora got herself a cup out of the shelf and poured some coffee. She didn’t much like the technological worlds beyond her’s, but she did love the food and drinks. Her worlds highest technology’s were tube radio’s and gas engines. The idea of living staring into glass was insane to her. She would be leaving it behind soon, she was heading to ER03 a world that was a mixture of both high and primitive technology’s depending on where you were.
She sat across from Dave and took a sip from her coffee.
“I’m leaving today. I’ll come back and tell you when it’s over”.
Dave looked up at her. She was a beautiful young woman 24 years old with bright blue eyes red hair ending just below her shoulders and about 4 foot 8 inches tall.
“You dont have to go Alora. You have money to start a new life, Simon made sure of that. Why go off to continue the task that killed him? So many people have lost their lives to this already”.
“It needs to end”.
“Why? You have never answered that question. Ya I know the network could be dangerous, but all it’s doing right now is small tasks for people too lazy to press buttons. Just leave it alone. It’s been running for two centuries, and nothing bad has happened other than what comes from looking for it. You can start a new life here, you’re sister has and she’s doing great”.
“People are going to find it eventually Dave. I saw how easy it is to control once they do. All Simon had to do was enter, and he knew everything it did and had as much control as anyone else inside did. Do you think Ashra getting better that same day was a coincidence?”
“No I don't, but that was a good thing Alora”.
“It was only a good thing because Simon and the rest of them are good people. The instant some asshole gets in all the power of it all will be used for whatever that person wants. I told them I was going to destroy it, and they didn’t even want to stop me”.
Dave lit a cigarette and passed one to Alora. She pulled out her lighter, it was made from a rifle case. She had found it in Simon’s gear after he died.
“You know once you do Simon and the rest will really be dead right?”
Alora nodded.
“Yes, but they are dead already. If they want me to stop they could tell me, or anyone. They could hear every thought we have right now if they want to, just because they don't doesn't mean they next person won't. One person could get in and know everything anyone to ever be exposed to it knows. If that one person wanted to take over the known universe all it would take is the will to do it. That’s what Vacks wanted to do. That’s what Simon gave his life to prevent, and that's why I have to put an end to it all”.
Dave took a deep drag from his cigarette before leaning back into his chair.
“Simon didn’t want you to be the one to do it. I know that”.
“You’re right, but who else knows? Who could be trusted to do it, knowing they could have all that power so easy? All that they would need is the will to take it”.
Nara stepped out of her room. She looked over at Dave and Alora noticing the look of concern on Dave’s face.
“I take it you’re leaving soon Alora?”
“Yes today”
“If you ever need to come back your welcome to our home. We won't be living here much longer anyway, as far as I’m concerned you can have it”.
Alora looked over at Nara.
“Thank you for the offer. Maybe once it’s over I’ll come back for a while”.
Please note this was just written a half hour ago and may include a few typos.
1.
Alora awoke from another strange dream, she had many since the day Simon died back on her homeworld. She well understood them to have meaning. She knew until she destroyed Alan’s lab she would have more. Alora got out of bed and left the room. Dave was in the kitchen pouring a cup of coffee. She had been staying with Simon’s friend Dave and his wife Nara for four months. After Simon’s and Nara’s dad’s deaths in the canyon, Alora had gone to her hometown left her buggy with her uncle, and left her homeworld behind. She only half understood why the lab and it’s technology needed to be destroyed, but she had an almost instinctual drive to do it. It could be the minds held in the vast network. She had told them she was going to put an end to them herself and no argument was made. It would mean putting an end to Simon as well, this bothered her greatly, yet she needed it to be done.
After passing through the gateway into the center she had gone to Dave and Nara’s apartment and told the news. Dave and Nara had been shocked by the death of Simon, but indifferent to the news that Vacks Nara’s own father had been killed as well. Vacks was the leader of half his world. A man who believed power was only obtained through fear, he took great care of his own people but reacted with cruel brutality to anyone who he perceived to make him appear weak or threaten his rule. His actions in life had left millions dead and destroyed the lives of many including his own daughter Ashra. Her mind had come back to her after Simon’s mind had entered the network. It would appear Simon had accomplished his original goal, but it cost him his body, only his mind remained now trapped in a mass network of computers no living man understood.
The technology itself was a network of computers running the center and on some of the worlds linked to it. To many people, it was just another thing to make life easy, a way to control computers with thought. They used it for menial tasks such as ordering food, buying clothing, and controlling the simple electric carts to get around the center. Just another novelty. No one really cared about what it was really capable of, no known person understood how it worked Alen Aiken put as much effort into keeping the true nature of it, as creating it in the first place. As long as no one could control it and it kept doing the mundane tasks it now did no one cared.
Very few knew his mind or the minds of others still lived on inside of it. Very few knew it had the power no only to read, but modify a human mind. Very few even cared enough to find out exactly what it all was. And only one of them knew it needed to be stopped.
2.
Alora got herself a cup out of the shelf and poured some coffee. She didn’t much like the technological worlds beyond her’s, but she did love the food and drinks. Her worlds highest technology’s were tube radio’s and gas engines. The idea of living staring into glass was insane to her. She would be leaving it behind soon, she was heading to ER03 a world that was a mixture of both high and primitive technology’s depending on where you were.
She sat across from Dave and took a sip from her coffee.
“I’m leaving today. I’ll come back and tell you when it’s over”.
Dave looked up at her. She was a beautiful young woman 24 years old with bright blue eyes red hair ending just below her shoulders and about 4 foot 8 inches tall.
“You dont have to go Alora. You have money to start a new life, Simon made sure of that. Why go off to continue the task that killed him? So many people have lost their lives to this already”.
“It needs to end”.
“Why? You have never answered that question. Ya I know the network could be dangerous, but all it’s doing right now is small tasks for people too lazy to press buttons. Just leave it alone. It’s been running for two centuries, and nothing bad has happened other than what comes from looking for it. You can start a new life here, you’re sister has and she’s doing great”.
“People are going to find it eventually Dave. I saw how easy it is to control once they do. All Simon had to do was enter, and he knew everything it did and had as much control as anyone else inside did. Do you think Ashra getting better that same day was a coincidence?”
“No I don't, but that was a good thing Alora”.
“It was only a good thing because Simon and the rest of them are good people. The instant some asshole gets in all the power of it all will be used for whatever that person wants. I told them I was going to destroy it, and they didn’t even want to stop me”.
Dave lit a cigarette and passed one to Alora. She pulled out her lighter, it was made from a rifle case. She had found it in Simon’s gear after he died.
“You know once you do Simon and the rest will really be dead right?”
Alora nodded.
“Yes, but they are dead already. If they want me to stop they could tell me, or anyone. They could hear every thought we have right now if they want to, just because they don't doesn't mean they next person won't. One person could get in and know everything anyone to ever be exposed to it knows. If that one person wanted to take over the known universe all it would take is the will to do it. That’s what Vacks wanted to do. That’s what Simon gave his life to prevent, and that's why I have to put an end to it all”.
Dave took a deep drag from his cigarette before leaning back into his chair.
“Simon didn’t want you to be the one to do it. I know that”.
“You’re right, but who else knows? Who could be trusted to do it, knowing they could have all that power so easy? All that they would need is the will to take it”.
Nara stepped out of her room. She looked over at Dave and Alora noticing the look of concern on Dave’s face.
“I take it you’re leaving soon Alora?”
“Yes today”
“If you ever need to come back your welcome to our home. We won't be living here much longer anyway, as far as I’m concerned you can have it”.
Alora looked over at Nara.
“Thank you for the offer. Maybe once it’s over I’ll come back for a while”.
