Zach777
Well-Known Member
Hi everyone.
Here's the opening of my sci-fi book, City of Glass. Please let me know if you think the beginning is too slow and if it needs to be spiced up. Also, please let me know if you spot any scientific inaccuracies.
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Chapter 1
Ion stumbled from a sharp jolt, the shaking ground frightening off the animals he studied. A second low rumble followed, disturbing a small layer of sand beneath his feet. Ion tapped his con device, deactivating the holographic computer screen he used to record notes. The seventh earthquake in four hours. He glanced at his com unit, the device wrapped snug around his arm. Numbers flickered across. One point five on the Richter Scale settled across the screen. Low, yes, but twice as powerful as those from last week. At least their frequency was low. Ion grimaced. Little comfort there.
He turned his head, climbing to his feet at the shadow falling over him. Wendell frowned. Ion wasn’t certain if the annoyance came from the quake, or from Ion’s propensity for zoology. Wendell studied him and turned his gaze toward Navadar’s sandy horizon. The first planet humans colonized outside the Sol System. To think Navadar might not be as stable as earlier generations of scientists led them to believe. A pretty planet, Ion couldn’t deny that. Shallow seas, vast deserts, and savannahs leading to tropical forests as one went toward the poles, Ion couldn’t help but be impressed by this world’s grandeur.
And now the damn earth started breaking apart. He let out a huff to focus his mind on the last animal he studied. A short-haired squirrel-like creature with saber teeth.
“You know why we were sent out here,” Wendell said. His voice carried comfort despite the sharp edge.
Oh, of course Ion knew. Investigate the shaking planet and try to determine why in Archanis’ name so many steam geysers erupted at once. So far, nothing. Only a fool wouldn’t understand the reason for trekking out here, but he and Wendell would never find the answers. Wendell was a renowned geologist. Not only the most accomplished in his native Zambia but also across the entirety of the tri-worlds. One would be hard pressed to find anyone more enthused by rocks on Earth, Mars, or the moon.
“I do,” Ion said, trying to keep the strain from his voice. He wished he didn’t understand the reason why. A bit contradictory? Maybe. “This isn’t the right place. Too many animals. If we were reaching the center of the seismic activity, there'd be far fewer.”
Wendell scratched at the stubble around his cheeks. “Maybe, but all my reports and studies say we are getting close. Besides, how many of those saber squirrels have we come across today?”
Few. In fact, Ion was certain the one he finished studying was the same creature stalking them in hopes for the occasional handout. Ion would have chastised Wendell for feeding wild animals. Since he did so himself, such words would have proven hypocritical. Ion’s fingers twitched as he forced himself not to drop a small handful of cactus meat.
“Not many,” Ion said. “Wouldn’t the earthquakes be getting stronger?”
“They have. If my calculations are correct, we should be experiencing three to four on the Richter Scale tomorrow.”
“What about St. Barlos?” Ion asked, referring to Navadar’s first and so far only settlement, established to the east some five months ago.
“One point five to two point five. Let’s just hope we find answers before it becomes worse.”
There’d be a plan to evacuate the settlers if things became worse. Problem was, Ion wasn’t entitled to know what such a plan might be. Sometimes he doubted there was a plan. Those higher up than himself acted as if this way a minor issue. Well, no surprise there. Most didn’t come to start a new life, explore an unknown world, or for some other noble reason. No, they came seeking riches, eyes blinded by the thought of filling themselves up on chips. Some of the higher up who became rich built elaborate mansions while many immigrants sat in tents waiting for the homes promised to them.
At least on his arrival in the second wave of colonists, Ion had enough chips to purchase himself a plot of land and a house. While he considered himself hopeless on fixing Navadar’s issues, he came so his wife and children had a safe place to live. None of them wanted to return home. Ion wouldn’t have minded. He loved his old life in Portland. Navadar proved a dry world, and he missed the near constant rain and the smell of wet grass.
“Ion, are you listening?” Wendell asked, snapping Ion from his thoughts.
“Sorry. Just distracted by other things.” He grimaced and tried to ignore the beeping of his com unit saying to adjust their position. Turns out they curved to the north. When corrected, the machine shut up.
“What’s wrong?”
“Thinking of Nat and the kids.”
“They’ll be fine once we fix whatever the issue is.”
Ion blinked. “Fix? How can we fix earthquakes?”
“I’m telling you, this isn’t natural. All scientists agreed Navadar would have fewer earthquakes than Earth, with most of them centering on the southern islands and western continent.”
“These are minor. Just more frequent than expected.”
“With a predictable increasing strength? No, this is not natural.”
“Then what? Aliens?” Ion asked, his tone harsher than he meant.
“Could be.”
“Not even the Jerrashu and Drakon have this level of technology.”
“Could be from a more advanced species.”
Well, he had a point there. Of the five known spacefaring species, humans were the newest to the galactic stage. Hell, five hundred years had passed since they first entered space and landed on the moon. Ion didn’t expect the galaxy to be a zoo, but he damn sure thought there’d be more aliens roaming about. Maybe there were. Some could have driven themselves into extinction. Humans came close a couple times.
Possible extinction was one of many good reasons to leave Earth and the Sol System behind. If humanity wanted to survive, they’d have to expand their little corner of the galaxy. Three planets and a moon. Miniscule. Well, it was a start, anyway.
How he missed his home back in Portland. His parents were too elderly to make the trip, and most of his friends remained in Ontario. As much as he wanted to return, it wasn’t possible. Natalie refused to go back for reasons she kept to herself, but he trusted his wife. For her, he’d remain put on this little dust ball of a planet.
Here's the opening of my sci-fi book, City of Glass. Please let me know if you think the beginning is too slow and if it needs to be spiced up. Also, please let me know if you spot any scientific inaccuracies.
************************************************************************************************
************************************************************************************************
*************************************************************************************************
Chapter 1
Ion stumbled from a sharp jolt, the shaking ground frightening off the animals he studied. A second low rumble followed, disturbing a small layer of sand beneath his feet. Ion tapped his con device, deactivating the holographic computer screen he used to record notes. The seventh earthquake in four hours. He glanced at his com unit, the device wrapped snug around his arm. Numbers flickered across. One point five on the Richter Scale settled across the screen. Low, yes, but twice as powerful as those from last week. At least their frequency was low. Ion grimaced. Little comfort there.
He turned his head, climbing to his feet at the shadow falling over him. Wendell frowned. Ion wasn’t certain if the annoyance came from the quake, or from Ion’s propensity for zoology. Wendell studied him and turned his gaze toward Navadar’s sandy horizon. The first planet humans colonized outside the Sol System. To think Navadar might not be as stable as earlier generations of scientists led them to believe. A pretty planet, Ion couldn’t deny that. Shallow seas, vast deserts, and savannahs leading to tropical forests as one went toward the poles, Ion couldn’t help but be impressed by this world’s grandeur.
And now the damn earth started breaking apart. He let out a huff to focus his mind on the last animal he studied. A short-haired squirrel-like creature with saber teeth.
“You know why we were sent out here,” Wendell said. His voice carried comfort despite the sharp edge.
Oh, of course Ion knew. Investigate the shaking planet and try to determine why in Archanis’ name so many steam geysers erupted at once. So far, nothing. Only a fool wouldn’t understand the reason for trekking out here, but he and Wendell would never find the answers. Wendell was a renowned geologist. Not only the most accomplished in his native Zambia but also across the entirety of the tri-worlds. One would be hard pressed to find anyone more enthused by rocks on Earth, Mars, or the moon.
“I do,” Ion said, trying to keep the strain from his voice. He wished he didn’t understand the reason why. A bit contradictory? Maybe. “This isn’t the right place. Too many animals. If we were reaching the center of the seismic activity, there'd be far fewer.”
Wendell scratched at the stubble around his cheeks. “Maybe, but all my reports and studies say we are getting close. Besides, how many of those saber squirrels have we come across today?”
Few. In fact, Ion was certain the one he finished studying was the same creature stalking them in hopes for the occasional handout. Ion would have chastised Wendell for feeding wild animals. Since he did so himself, such words would have proven hypocritical. Ion’s fingers twitched as he forced himself not to drop a small handful of cactus meat.
“Not many,” Ion said. “Wouldn’t the earthquakes be getting stronger?”
“They have. If my calculations are correct, we should be experiencing three to four on the Richter Scale tomorrow.”
“What about St. Barlos?” Ion asked, referring to Navadar’s first and so far only settlement, established to the east some five months ago.
“One point five to two point five. Let’s just hope we find answers before it becomes worse.”
There’d be a plan to evacuate the settlers if things became worse. Problem was, Ion wasn’t entitled to know what such a plan might be. Sometimes he doubted there was a plan. Those higher up than himself acted as if this way a minor issue. Well, no surprise there. Most didn’t come to start a new life, explore an unknown world, or for some other noble reason. No, they came seeking riches, eyes blinded by the thought of filling themselves up on chips. Some of the higher up who became rich built elaborate mansions while many immigrants sat in tents waiting for the homes promised to them.
At least on his arrival in the second wave of colonists, Ion had enough chips to purchase himself a plot of land and a house. While he considered himself hopeless on fixing Navadar’s issues, he came so his wife and children had a safe place to live. None of them wanted to return home. Ion wouldn’t have minded. He loved his old life in Portland. Navadar proved a dry world, and he missed the near constant rain and the smell of wet grass.
“Ion, are you listening?” Wendell asked, snapping Ion from his thoughts.
“Sorry. Just distracted by other things.” He grimaced and tried to ignore the beeping of his com unit saying to adjust their position. Turns out they curved to the north. When corrected, the machine shut up.
“What’s wrong?”
“Thinking of Nat and the kids.”
“They’ll be fine once we fix whatever the issue is.”
Ion blinked. “Fix? How can we fix earthquakes?”
“I’m telling you, this isn’t natural. All scientists agreed Navadar would have fewer earthquakes than Earth, with most of them centering on the southern islands and western continent.”
“These are minor. Just more frequent than expected.”
“With a predictable increasing strength? No, this is not natural.”
“Then what? Aliens?” Ion asked, his tone harsher than he meant.
“Could be.”
“Not even the Jerrashu and Drakon have this level of technology.”
“Could be from a more advanced species.”
Well, he had a point there. Of the five known spacefaring species, humans were the newest to the galactic stage. Hell, five hundred years had passed since they first entered space and landed on the moon. Ion didn’t expect the galaxy to be a zoo, but he damn sure thought there’d be more aliens roaming about. Maybe there were. Some could have driven themselves into extinction. Humans came close a couple times.
Possible extinction was one of many good reasons to leave Earth and the Sol System behind. If humanity wanted to survive, they’d have to expand their little corner of the galaxy. Three planets and a moon. Miniscule. Well, it was a start, anyway.
How he missed his home back in Portland. His parents were too elderly to make the trip, and most of his friends remained in Ontario. As much as he wanted to return, it wasn’t possible. Natalie refused to go back for reasons she kept to herself, but he trusted his wife. For her, he’d remain put on this little dust ball of a planet.
