Handling emotional scenes early on in the story

[RandomSimpEvent]

I was reading a story where the main character's family is killed by supernatural forces, forcing the character into that world. The family deaths served as a catalyst to kick off the rest of the plot and so had to happen early on, but as there was no time to develop an emotional connection, the main character's grief and subsequent emotional breakdowns felt hollow and melodramatic. However, not having any reaction at all would have been weirder. So that got me wondering. How do you handle emotionally charged moments like this early on when no proper emotional connection has been established, yet these moments are integral and need to occur?

 

[The Judge]

@RandomSimpEvent, are you asking how we handle it as readers, or as writers? If the former, I'll leave the thread here, but if you're thinking of it from a writing perspective, then I'll move it over to Writing Discussion.

 

[Bramandin]

I think I saw the first episode of an anime like that. Also, Supernatural.

On a philosophical level, this question is a little distressing. "Why should I care about X character?" Are we so worn-down by constant misery that we have to be emotionally invested in someone before we care that bad things are happening to them?

 

[RandomSimpEvent]

@RandomSimpEvent, are you asking how we handle it as readers, or as writers? If the former, I'll leave the thread here, but if you're thinking of it from a writing perspective, then I'll move it over to Writing Discussion.

Oh, my bad, I put this in the wrong thread. Yes, I did mean from a writer's perspective.

 

[Troyzan787]

It certainly depends on how sensitive the reader is. Some people do not need to be deeply connected to a character/person to empathize with. If the emotionally charged event is approachable enough it should trigger some memories and emotions.

From a writing standpoint, perhaps keep those emotions charged with the main character. That way as the reader does become more invested in the character those feelings will become pore powerful as well.

 

[Flaviosky]

I guess it depends on which style the book will follow or what topics is the plot based on. If the novel is more centered on action, events and such, then there's no need to give that weight to that event, since emotions are not that relevant, especially if characters are somewhat flat and don't need to develop that much for the plot to unfold.

 

[sknox]

My first reaction as reader is to drop the book. I don't care for cheap motivation.

So, as a writer, I would look for another way. There are lots of alternatives, but the key is always what does the character want and what stands in the way. Then I would work on why the reader would care what the MC wants.

 

[Toby Frost]

I'd feel much the same: it's too obvious. If I absolutely had to do this, I would show the character seeing smoke from his burning home and rushing back, then cut to him six months later, trying to hold himself together. I think a scene where a character stands in the ashes and cries "Noooo" (which I always read to rhyme with "moo") runs the risk of being tacky, especially where we hardly know the character.

 

[Wayne Mack]

One of the more common plot formats is to baseline a character and then provide a plot twist as a call to action. This call to action often has an emotional effect on the main character (see

video, about 1 hour total). In the initial set up, it helps to give the reader a feeling of 'normal,' about the character and environment. The initial twist breaks this normal and sets the character on the path towards the climax.

Though the initial twist may have an emotional effect on the main character, it is not likely to have an emotional effect on the reader. It just needs to provide justification in the reader's mind for the main character to shift paths. The pattern for the emotional scene is simply, establish a (perhaps boring) baseline and then have a jolt to force the character and the plot out of the baseline.

 

[therapist]

How do you handle emotionally charged moments like this early on when no proper emotional connection has been established, yet these moments are integral and need to occur?

This is a good question. And I agree with your instincts that the reader won't want to dwell on the grief because they won't care. The reader wants the character to get over their grief and get on with the story, but they need an excuse to do so (otherwise the MC seems emotionless and weird).

I think some time manipulation can do a good job of this. For example, 'The main character spent a full month in a profound state of grief. The memory of his dead family was intense and painful, but over the weeks, began to fade. It didn't fade all the way, and it likely never would, but it faded enough for him to get on with the rest of the story.'

But what if the family death happens during the inciting incident and we can't just skip over a month of grief in 3 sentences?

 

[Jo Zebedee]

I do think you need an attachment to really hook readers to high emotion, so I think I'd restructure the book to get that in. I've had to do that for a trilogy where there is the loss of two pivotal characters early on. Originally it was chapter 30, then I lopped about 70,000 words off so that it was chapter one - it ended up as chapter six in the final version. And it works much better I think.

 

[Swank]

Why depict the emotion at all? You've provided a traumatic event. Draw the reader in by letting them wonder what effect it exactly had.

 

[AnyaKimlin]

As a writer, I focus on giving the reader a reason to give a damn about the characters and also give them a clear idea of where my characters are, why they are there etc That can be done in relatively few words but there has to be something that allows that reader to empathise and to want to know more about the characters. At least that's what I like as a reader. There's nothing worse than a major event that I know I should care about the characters because it's horrific but I get to the end of it and think so what.

My absolute hero for creating clear characters with pathos is Dolly Parton (Shakespeare is a close second, mostly because he's more of an effort to study lol) - I mean what she does with a character and a few hundred words is absolutely stunning. It is too simplistic for a novel and does need tweaking but lets face it millions care about Jolene/Dolly, Joshua, Applejack, Little Andy, Backwoods Barbie etc I take her techniques and tweak them.

For worldbuilding I go to Ellis Peters and Cadfael - she drops us right into a mediaeval world straight away. I can clearly see, hear, smell etc (characters have five senses) what her characters are doing and I experience the opening scenes with them as a result. I feel her characters and stories long after I have stopped reading them.

And yes there are more modern examples (currently reading a gentleman called James Andrews that has done an amazing job).

 

[AllanR]

'When Gregor Samsa woke up one morning from unsettling dreams, he found himself changed in his bed into a monstrous vermin.' (Metamorphasis, Kafka)

Sometimes the first line should be it.

 

[Overread]

This is a good question. And I agree with your instincts that the reader won't want to dwell on the grief because they won't care. The reader wants the character to get over their grief and get on with the story, but they need an excuse to do so (otherwise the MC seems emotionless and weird).

I think some time manipulation can do a good job of this. For example, 'The main character spent a full month in a profound state of grief. The memory of his dead family was intense and painful, but over the weeks, began to fade. It didn't fade all the way, and it likely never would, but it faded enough for him to get on with the rest of the story.'

But what if the family death happens during the inciting incident and we can't just skip over a month of grief in 3 sentences?

This is a very interesting statement because in some ways its true and in some ways its not.
You say that the reader wants the character to get over the grief and move on and that sounds really cold. Detached, cold, cruel and harsh on the character. Yet its actually often what readers want - we want to see characters change and react to events, but we also want them to often be heroes or at least to rise to challenges they meet.

A character who doesn't, or who dwells on their failures too long is actually super hard to create, especially if the novel focuses on a single character point of view for the story (with multi-character stories like Game of Thrones and such, you've a lot more scope for a depressed character because they are balanced out by other characters). Robin Hobb I think encountered this with her Soldier's Son series where the lead character spends much of the story almost being swept along by the world around him and spends a lot of the 2nd book in a very depressed state. I find it very interesting because many find the story to not be one of her best, and yet I think she actually took on the challenge and achieved it really well in writing a character who, fundamentally, isn't much of a hero and who is rather depressed and crushed by the weight of many aspects of the world and events which happen to them.





As for emotional trauma early in a story, look at Disney and Pixar. They use early trauma a LOT in their story structure. Consider a story like UP or Frozen or Anastasia. In each of those stories the lead character experiences serious trauma/loss of a loved one very early in the story. In stories like UP its quite an emotional event for character and, honestly, viewer. In Frozen and Anastasia the event isn't glossed over, but it is sped past much more so. It becomes an event which shapes the characters, but we don't dwell on the immediate traumatic period after, but rather after a time advance.
The other approach is the Lion King style, where the trauma is much later and holds much greater impact on the audience. Interestingly even with that greater emotional contact they still use a time advance, though that's more for the practicality of aging the character up to fit the way the story evolves.

 

[therapist]

Robin Hobb I think encountered this with her Soldier's Son series where the lead character spends much of the story almost being swept along by the world around him and spends a lot of the 2nd book in a very depressed state. I find it very interesting because many find the story to not be one of her best, and yet I think she actually took on the challenge and achieved it really well in writing a character who, fundamentally, isn't much of a hero and who is rather depressed and crushed by the weight of many aspects of the world and events which happen to them.

I haven't read Soldier's Son. But I recently read her other 16 book long series. She is a great writer. I was going to use her as an example because there is a scene

Spoiler: MASSIVE SPOILER FOR FARSEER SERIES

(when Nighteyes dies)

which I found that to be the most emotional a book has ever made me. And I remember wanting the character to keep dwelling on the grief because I was grieving myself, and reading about the character going through his grief was carthartic and satisfying and beautiful.
But this was earned through a long and slow relationship that built over multiple books.

I remember one of Sanderson's lectures talks about the importance of creating empathy for character, and uses a character from Lost as an example. The character just wanted his son back, and it was all he thought about. A good recipe for empathy, but this character was polled as the most disliked character, because in his grief he was boring and one note.