The Magellan Galaxy Chronicles

[Whitestar]

I have something in the works in the form of an outline that I plan to eventually write it as a screenplay.

So far, I have a brief synopsis:

"The story line follows the life and adventures of Akillian, a Galactic trader of many cycles, who has lost his wife and children and is searching the known universe for other beings like himself. Special beings whose talents will be needed to survive the coming war with the Kabba. He is trying to band the remaining tribes of humans together to fight a common foe in an attempt to win their freedom and live their lives in peace."

I call it "The Magellan Galaxy Chronicles" and it is based on a concept by the late-Richard Hatch (of Battlestar Galactica fame) entitled, "The Great War of Magellan". I chose not to use the latter as a title for two reasons: First, it's right on the nose, and second, I wish to avoid any legal issues.

I just began writing the outline based on what I have seen from the trailer and the behind-the-scenes video from YouTube, and one of my goals is to honor his memory by keeping his vision alive in some form and yet, I feel somewhat torn between doing that or starting fresh. Am I better off adhering to his vision or should I start from the ground up? What does everybody else think? I would really appreciate some valuable feedback on this, thank you!

 

[Biskit]

I'd never heard of this, but it seemed to end up as an RPG, so presumably everything about it is copyrighted. Unless the copyright is up for grabs, I would have thought it had no future with any production company as a screenplay. If you are basing things on original work then you could still bump up against copyright issues, so I would have thought starting fresh would make most sense.

If you plan this as fanfic, then stick with the original.

 

[Whitestar]

Thank you for responding!

Actually, I was hoping to reignite interest in the project by contacting Global Star Productions since they co-own it with Hatch. In fact, I contacted them a few weeks ago on Instagram and I have yet to hear back from them, if at all. If they don't respond, I will automatically take it as a sign that they are not interested and want the project to stay dead. If that is the case, then I will do as you suggest and start over.

By the way, what do you think of my title, "The Magellan Galaxy Chronicles"? Is it too obvious or appropriate?

 

[Biskit]

Actually, I was hoping to reignite interest in the project by contacting Global Star Productions since they co-own it with Hatch. In fact, I contacted them a few weeks ago on Instagram and I have yet to hear back from them, if at all. If they don't respond, I will automatically take it as a sign that they are not interested and want the project to stay dead. If that is the case, then I will do as you suggest and start over.

By the way, what do you think of my title, "The Magellan Galaxy Chronicles"? Is it too obvious or appropriate?

It doesn't work for me but I have struggled to pin down why, so brace yourself for a stream-of-consciousness answer.

It feels a bit bland as titles go, certainly as compared to "The Great War of Magellan", which sort of tells you what to expect (in a cheesy sort of way) and follows some basic click- bait rules: in five words it promises something big (Great), action and adventure (War) and something historical or mystical (Magellan isn't exactly an everyday name at present).

Now seriously thinking with my fingers on the keyboard, putting "Magellan" early in the title is possibly the problem, and it sort of echoes a discussion I had with the Biskitetta a while back about titles for my current WIP. Five books, five titles and something nagged me about the first one not being right and we finally broke it down to the other four followed some simple patterns and number one didn't. Basically, the two patterns worked out as something like "(The) X of/with/from the ADJECTIVE Y", which immediately makes me think of books like RA MacAvoy's "Tea with the Black Dragon", or my other title pattern was the (startling/odd) name of a major character, but the first book was basically an "X of the Y" pattern and really needed that ADJECTIVE before the Y to feel right.

I think the point that I'm scrabbling towards is that titles like these need to have a good rhythm to them. Now that I'm thinking about it, the two titles I had as character names both started with a two-syllable name. It seems nit-picky as I'm writing, but somehow something like "Suzi Deathfiend" feels better than "Sue Deathfiend". Even just in my head, the rhythm is better with the first version.

Thinking a bit further, "The Magellan Galaxy Chronicles" is fine as a working title, but it's got the wrong number of words in it.
"The Magellan Chronicles" works as a rhythm but I'm not sure it conveys the right feel.
"The Galaxy Chronicles" is OK for rhythm, but again it's not right
"Chronicles of the Magellan Galaxy" is OK, but a but cumbersome.
"Chronicles of the Magellan Conflict/War/Anarchy" hmmm.
"Chronicles of the Magellan Apocalypse" my favourite so far in this ramble because the rhythm feels OK and it's prime clickbait, but it still feels cumbersome.
"Magellan's Apocalypse" completely fails to fit any of my patterns etc, but I sort of like it.

And now my head has gone significantly sideways to a book I haven't read in a few decades which has a longish title that just flows, Doris Lessing's "The Sentimental Agents in the Volyen Empire", which interestingly is yet another pattern like my "(The) X of/with/from the ADJECTIVE Y", has a sneaky clickbait feel to it and and nice rolling rhythm. So, as a quick and dirty, you could adapt that to something like "The Coming of The War to the Magellan Galaxy." The rhythm isn't right, but it's a start. Galaxy has too many syllables.
Something like "The Coming of The War to the Magellanic Cloud" (which you could just about sing to "Glory, Glory Hallelujah").

I shall now leave you with the stream of gibberish and go attend to a sick sheep.

(Why does Chrons not have a sheep emoji?)

 

[Whitestar]

Hmmm.... I have some thinking to do. Thanks for the suggestions!