"Not a lot of people get me and Zoe" I had to agree, but the more I see how they interact, the more I get it. Kind of an "opposites attract" kind of thing.
Definintely. Not only is Wash's line, "I am a leaf on the wind" describe his style of flying through chaos... it describes his lifestyle.
In
Out of Gas, we learn that many captains consider Wash a superb pilot. And yet, he signs on with Mal. Wash goes with the wind. He does not fight against it. He thrives on disorder. He does not mind changes in plans. Zoe gives him stability. Her regimen and discipline provide a refuge for him. Zoe, on the other hand, benefits from Wash's intentional carefree lifestyle. He allows her to safely explore her desires to be spontaneous. Tracey confirms our suspicions, in
The Message, that no one from Zoe's past will believe that she could ever loosen up enough to get married.
More often than not, opposites eventually drive each other crazy. The very qualities that seem so wonderful and seductive finally become repulsive when the other person cannot turn it off during a crisis. We can see tension in Wash's and Zoe's marriage. In
War Stories, Wash has had enough of Zoe's entrenched patterns. When she refuses to embrace his new idea for financial freedom, he loses it. And Zoe has enough of Wash's flexible lifestyle when he persists in his excuses to not father a child during
Heart of Gold.
We saw less than two years of their marriage, so I cannot say if they'd have lasted another twenty. But it seems that their marriage, despite the tension, had real communication. That they were able to argue and discuss their deepest frustrations and still love each other speaks volumes. None of the other two couples on board were even close to opening up, let alone accepting the other person fully. Kaylee let Simon know she was interested, but she never got very far with him. Simon's confession near the end of
Serenity hardly gets to the heart of the matter... yet it's enough to get Kaylee naked... and it was a thousand times better than his confession next to the cow fetus. And neither Inara nor Mal will ever make the first move to open themselves. They're both too guarded.