but I'm dreading the time when I'll have to work full time--I know I am not going to like that!
I was just like you when I was your age - or when you're my age or if I'm not already, but you are.
Point is, I didn't think I'd be able to handle full-time work because of terminal shyness, but the fact is you get to know one or two, get to like some of them and they're the ones you stick around with most. I currently manage a staff of 20 and feel fine with each of them because I like most of them. Which is what makes me a bad manager, I suppose. Anyway, change of subject ...
I came to the conclusion, relatively recently, that with strangers I'm fine if I have a role to play. If I don't know what my character is, I freeze like a frozen jellyfish. So in a large group, if I have a camera in my hand or notes to read from, I can do just fine. I can teach, I can publicly speak, but I can't introduce myself to people at parties, which is why I never go to parties and get really embarrassed when I'm invited - the person might actually like me to be there, after all.
I don't know if writing and self-esteem issues are that closely linked (I know plenty of people with low self esteem who never wrote a word in their lives, but probably have some other release valve) but with writing being such a solitary passtime, and Fitzgerald and Hemingway notwithstanding, it must appeal greatly to people who only like getting really close to vast castlists of people in their imaginations.
I suppose, just to stay on-topic, a lot of aspiring writers just don't leave the building in the first place?