Random Challenge 2

Space Monkey

Science fiction fantasy
Joined
Dec 1, 2004
Messages
142
I know the random challenge is Knivesout's gig, but I've always loved the work of Beksinski and would really like to see what stories this pic might conjure.
Same again, 500 words or less...
I'm not treading on your toes or screwing up your master plan, am I JP?
Linked from http://morpheusgallery.com/

E99C3AA41E87FE9988256E0E007251E7_Image.jpg
 
Hah! Far from it! Great choice of pic too - I like Beksinki's work a lot too (and can never remember how to spell his name).

[EDIT: My 15-mnt piece has been accepted for publication by these good folk: http://www.absurdistjournal.com/index.htm , so I've had to remove it from here. Cheers, and thanks to Space Monkey for nudging me towards what may be my first fiction publication. :) )
 
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lmao that was great. Here's a shot at it too:

I wish I’d never taken the assignment.

I can picture my boss now, the fat bald *******, screwing up his face and pleading with his eyes, the way he always does when he dishes out the crappy jobs. He squints and grimaces and snivels and hunches over, as though he’s the one doing the dirty work.

And it’s never just a favour. It’s always a tiny favour, and he only calls you Mate whenever a mess needs cleaning up.

“Billy, Mate, Mrs Black’s turbo vacuum cleaner exploded; she didn’t realise you had to empty it every few months, and it’s quite a mess down there apparently. Would you take a look at it for me?”

I’ve been riding round this town for the last five hours. This map is useless; everything looks the same, like a nuclear fog, and I can barely breathe. I thought he was joking when he said “Take your goggles”.

I don’t know what she’s been Hoovering, but evidently it fosters growth. You should see the size of the bugs here. I’ve just ridden through a money-spider cobweb, and nearly had my nuts ripped off by a midge.
I’m going to rip his off when I get back, if I ever find my way out of here.

Uh-oh, better get going. It sounds like the dust-mites are doing their rounds again.

Remember me next time you procrastinate on the cleaning.
And for Christ’s sake, empty the bag.
 
:) Thanks!
A midge is, umm, a gnat?
I dunno, tiny, tiny little flies, you see millions of them in little clusters in summer and when you try to swat them, they're too quick - they just dissipate, laugh at you then torment you further. Except when you're mountain biking - then they deliberately go down your throat and make you fall off.
 
I like these things, though it has technically ceased to be random.

Also, sorry if this is too long, as I don't have word count and forgot about the limit, and sorry that it took a little longer than 15 minutes. And the ending is aweful because I felt it had to go somewhere.

_________________________________

The roadways out past the Cut were clouded with dust and stone. Winds howling in over the desert, churned by the vast thermal generation of the sand, coiled into whirlwinds, wily-willies and sandstorms. Banks of dust and shale and parched botanica rolled over the world like waves.
The woman dropped the kickstand on her bike and let it idle. The filters were beginning to choke and she had to strain with one leg to keep balance. She looked out through the face plate down the gradual slope that vanished into burnt umber, then black.

'Like bees,' she thought. 'Or snow.' She had never seen snow outside of a theatre, and her memories took-on a harch cast when linked with this.

She decided to make camp. In her saddle bags were a few things, mostly useful, amongst them a tent. She took it out and stapled it to the compacted earth, pulling the dun awning over the bike and curling next to it. Inside the small chamber, six feet to a side, the air was close and musty and dust still swirled. The walls reverberated as the sandstorm tried to tear the tent away.

She twisted at her helmet and it came off. Cropped premature grey and a face that, given time and care, would be beautiful. Her arm screeched and she removed the cover and oiled the joints.

Some time later, when the storm had died in intensity and might restrict itself to skinning beasts alive, the woman woke up.

The was a sharp, cracking sound.

She snapped her helmet on and reached for her pistol. The worn old combustion-affair was loaded with shatter rounds. Unzipping the airlock and passing through the antechamber, she stuck her head out into the storm.

There was nothing to be seen. Absolute darkness. But in the darkness the cracking sounded again.

She waited.

Several quick snaps, a click, all faint yet audible beneath the scream of the wind. She flicked her thermal filter on and got nothing. The dust was too hot. She bipassed ultra-sound, found the electromagnetoscope hopelessly-distorted, and in the endsettled on waiting.

A crack opened in the wall of sand and through it there moved a chain of figures, dark silhouettes clicking and screeching, an endless troupe of hexapods swinging madibled heads from side to side.

Curiosity bloomed. She set her inertial compass and followed after them. Her chitinous exoskeleton withstood the grinding atmosphere but her legs had trouble supporting her. She made her way through the desert, questing after the ants. Her feet sunk through the malleable earth and she began to sweat.

The ants vanished. The woman, incautious, stumbled and fell down into the pit. She tumbled behind a boulder and looked around her at the sand-strewn mouth of a tunnel leading into the darkness. She switched to low-light and watched the last of the ants vanish around a bend. She rose and followed, eyes open, chemoreceptors in forewarning of ambush.

Around the bend was a chamber, walls smooth and grey like concrete and ridged with pathways and empty sockets gaping, awaiting lights. She praised her luck and continued into the tunnel, searching for a side passage. Narrow chutes opened on every side and the faint traces of chemical trails were evident everywhere.

She turned a corner and walked up a ramp. Away on every side opened-up a chamber larger than any cathedral, a roof of square plates undulating and held-up by iron girders. Here or there a plate had broken and spilled a mountain of sand into the the chamber. In the distance the excreted cement of the ants had consumed a web of girders, and dozens of workers went to and fro bearing scraps of flesh and vegetation to their queen. In the depressions where the rails had once run, hexagonal cells held pupa squirming under translucent wax lids, nymphs tending them and bearing new eggs to their wombs. And through it all crawled fungi, trimemd and tended and consumed, occupying vast patches of the walls and floor and ceiling.

Looking around, desperate, ecstatic at her find, the woman crept the length of the platform, tore-down a cracked and useless sign, and ran. Several nymphs, espying her, began to screeched and chitter. A number of soldiers, ludicrous jaws gaping, squirted acid at her and tried to sever her in two. She shot one in the space behind the head and split another's abdomen with the edge of her arm. The joint creaked as she hefted the sign and sprinted. She did not stop as she retraced her steps and tossed a beacon ramdomly into a crevice. Climbing up out of the pit with her treasure in hand, she knew that she would definitely be coming back.

 
And a fellow cartoonist as well. Such talents brewing behind the curtain of this little community. :D
 
Here's my go:

Death was please with himself.

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d managed to take a holiday; not for several millennia at least. But now at last he had managed to secure himself a two week cycling holiday in Cornwall.

The best part of the whole holiday was that he had arranged it specifically so that no one knew where he was going; after all if he himself didn’t know where he was going how could anyone else? And if no one knew how to find him they couldn’t make him do any work.

The cycling was tiring him out, he wasn’t used to exercising; thousands of years of teleporting from place to place had made his joints stiffen up. He was also thirsty.

Several miles in the distance he could spy a farm.

It was a very pretty little farm with chickens and ducks and geese running around loose in the farm yard; there was even a goat nibbling the laundry hung out on the washing line.

It was only a matter of moments before Death pulled up in the farm yard and walked up to the large wooden front door.

He gave a knock but there was no answer.

”Coo-ee” he called through the door.

This time he though he heard a sound so made his way through the door and down the hall to the room that was obviously the kitchen; the big give away here was the imposing stove and evidence of bread making on the enormous wooded table in the centre of the room.

The noise had apparently come from the rocking chair by the stove; where a very wizened old man sat wrapped in a patchwork quilt.

Death had a sudden feeling of foreboding as he looked down at the old man; a general feeling of inevitability. He went over to the old man and placed his hand over his forehead.

“Feeling better?” Death asked

“Wonderful” the young man standing next to the rocker replied

“Good, well the white lights over there” Death said indicating the backdoor

“Righty-ho” said the young man and made his way over to the door

After he had gone Death had a quick look around the kitchen. In a cold storage cupboard he found a jug of milk which he drank in one draft. He also found a cake tin with a large fruit cake in it, which he decided to take in case he felt peckish later.

Back out in the farm yard he remounted his bike and pointed it out across the fields.

He had decided that in order to properly enjoy his holiday he should try to stay away from the kind of places where he might run into people; they had a nasty habit of reminding him he hadn’t arranged a substitute before he went away.

Ridding off in the distance he muttered to himself “At least now I can take off this bloody mask, it boiling in here”
 
Here's my quick effort. I couldn't bring myself to write any more... it was too bad!


Mrs Death ground her teeth in frustration as she studied the instruction manual through her borrowed set of riding goggles. ‘Bloody newfangled technology!’ she swore, slamming the manual against the handlebars so hard that she inadvertently impaled it there.

‘“Take the bike, dear,” he says. “It’ll save you time,” he says,’ she muttered with venom, as she tried in vain to decipher the meaningless language of the manual. ‘When I get home to that good-for-nothing, mean-faced, maggot-eaten husband of mine, I’ll give him hell to pay for this! If I didn’t know better, I’d say he was trying to get me out of the way. If I find that there’s been an earthquake, plane crash, volcanic eruption, or anything else that’s allowed him to go and swing his scythe with abandon whilst I’ve been stuck out here on this damned contraption, then I’ll… Ah! Wait a minute. Lower the stand. That might be it. Lower the stand it says.’

Mrs Death kicked the bike back off the stand and twisted the accelerator. Leaping forward, the throaty engine’s growl deepened for a moment before picking up rapidly into a whining screech as she raced out of the car park.

‘Death on a bike!’ exclaimed the supermarket manager, looking out of the window. ‘Did you see that?’

‘See what?’ asked the checkout girl, staring vacantly at her brightly painted nails.

‘Death on a… oh, never mind!’



:)
 
LMAO those last 2 were ace.
Silk - are you a Pratchett fan, and have you by any chance read Reaper Man?:D
 
I was gonna say the same thing---sounds like Pratchett with Death taking a holiday and whatnot.
 
Ergh... Here's another one.

"I hate these maps." 67 sat on his bike, tremendously overdue. "I can never figure them out." The nuclear holocaust had filled up his schedule for weeks now. The dust clouds were still flying, reducing visibility to nil, making landmarks useless, and the radiation kept throwing off his sense of direction. That was a side effect he hadn't been expecting.

He was sitting along I-95, shortly after spotting a road sign. Although, road signs couldn't be trusted either. Most of them had blown miles away from their original placement, but a few remained upright afterward. This one looked as though it had stood its ground, so he was probably where he wanted to be.

He'd found the bike somewhere in northeast Pennsylvania, shortly after the Winnebago he'd picked up in New York gave out. Before that, he'd been driving a BMW, and before that, flying a Cessna. He noticed that more and more electrical devices were falling prey to the radiation. The bike was the most reliable method of travel he had now. He could no longer rely on his former method of traveling, the sub-dimensional jumping that served him for generations beforehand. His first jump into an irradiated area threw him off by five-hundred miles. A few more bad jumps told him that it wasn't a fluke. He stuck to areas that weren't irradiated until he decided to try using the Cessna. He'd hung around pilots long enough on his days off, just out of sheer curiosity, that he had learned enough to be useful as a pilot.

Of course, days off weren't something the original Death could enjoy before he'd started this little venture. Death had decided after a few centuries of non-stop work that he'd try to recruit a soul that had attached itself to a loved one, and left itself stranded in the corporeal realm. Not only was he successful, he'd recruited seventy three more before the end of the decade. Of course, as populations grew, so did the demand on Death, and before long, he was recruiting thousands. Eventually, there were so many subordinates doing his work that he could retire and relax. But rumor had it that this holocaust even had him out, helping with the backlog.

67 had heard the rumors from 817 and 473,295. Each recruit was referred to by his or her number after recruitment, and their old gender was inevitably replaced with male, as everyone expected Death to be male when he came. No one understood why. Not even Death himself. 67 had actually been a woman in life. 817 had stuck with 67 for a while in upstate New York, working on some small time cases, but when the summons began coming in for D.C., they split up. 817 wouldn't get any D.C. cases any time soon. High profile cases were usually reserved for those among the original seventy three. 473,295 had been puttering around eastern Pennsylvania when 67 had passed through. He said that 3,428 told him of the rumor. 67 hadn’t actually heard anything official, but he wouldn’t doubt that the old guy was out to help.

As 67 rode along, more and more landmarks became visible closer together. He was heading towards the Mall. He could barely make it out, but the Washington Monument was still standing. The capitol building was a jumble of wreckage, but somehow the dome had stayed in one piece. He took out the updated list, and checked the first name. It wasn’t one he recognized, but then again, he tried to stay out of recent news. The last time he had checked up on the United States, Grant was president. Time passed awfully fast though, and Death had told 67 about how nuclear weapons would one day give them the most work they’d ever seen, and probably end their venture entirely afterward. 67 hadn’t believed it, but they’d never been this busy before, and before the end of it all, they may very well take every life on Earth.

It was the location next to the name that clued 67 in on who the name could be. There weren’t too many people who made their home at the White House. 67 had heard about some Middle East conflict caused by the United States president, but he’d been taking an extended vacation for the past century. It was only this holocaust that had brought him back.

He sighed, and began his trek toward the jumble of broken beams and glass to find this “George W. Bush.”
 
My Very Lame Attempt at 15 Minutes of Fame

"There are all kinds of Hells. Sure, there is the all too infamous Hell where you towel off your blistering body with a tattered set of rags. You could chip away at inferno’s rocks while the Diablo busts your balls: that is the deal. Perhaps demons flush with the type of sanguine found vibrant in emergency exit signs will be pointing and laughing at your sweat. Maybe they will dance. Maybe you will cry. Either way, this type of Hell is a Hell in onto itself simply for being so damned unoriginal.

"Maybe instead of working onto eternity, you could relive your greatest fears over and over again until the Groundhog Day effect drives you insane. There could be whipping, involved. Hell, there could be outright torture in Hell.

"There were some horrible heart breaks in my life. The Sirens of humiliation could throw a green captain’s hat upon my head and trick me into breaking the bones of my spirit against the jagged points of memories I would have rather forgotten.

"There could be a type of Hell that berated you with bad puns, but I am not a joking man.

"I am sure of it, I tell you. Hell spits itself up in many forms. Sometimes it is in the partially digested forms of our own sins. Sometimes it’s the stomach acid that froths from kindred souls who would not like being reminded where they ended up by your very presence beside them. The carnage is crueller on the other side of the fence. That sort of thing.

"My point is, officer," Herbert said while failing to rub away the soot from his bifocals, "out of all the Hells you could put your mind to, could you ever imagine this?"

Herbert, who had decided that an ash tainted vision is better than a Monet one, put his bifocals back on his shy self and pointed one stubby finger at the museum engulfed in flames, which were eager to taunt the night sky.

"Could you imagine a Hell where a caretaker who had all the world’s history and treasures before him and under his care, only managed to save this—" he motioned to an artifact comprised of a skeleton melted onto a motorbike "—vulgar sculpture from a fire?"
 
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Space Monkey said:
LMAO those last 2 were ace.
Silk - are you a Pratchett fan, and have you by any chance read Reaper Man?:D

I am a bit, that was the inspiration anyway ;) that and the Famous Five

Edit - I Like your take on things NSMike, very chioce!
 
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This pic has inspired some really cool pieces of imagination. I really like the last 2 too, McMurphy and NSMike (I especially like the ending...!).

Where would I have ended up today if it wasn't for the famous five babysitting me throughout childhood?
We recently had a few beers and had a reminiscathon, looking all the Famous Five books up online - I had no idea how many books Enid Blyton wrote in her lifetime! I also had no idea the series was so old. It was ace.
 
My own take--another "death" personification. Nice and short, since my three year old needs some attention!

"Unemployment," Death mumbled as he searched the want ads. How could he be jobless? There was war in Iraq, and countless shouls to harvest in Darfur. His employer should be beating down his door with assignments! But no, they had requested he turn in his pale horse, and his scythe. At least they had given him back the bike--the one he'd had a penchant for in the 70s.

Death shook his head, and sighed. He was being 'phased out'. He had a limited 'skill set'. Younger, more eager 'Deaths' were swooping in and gaining all the coveted assignments. The ones with high visibility. His manager thought he could no longer cut it. Well, he would show them. He would show them all. He was going to go get a job in one of those specialty stores in the mall--
sharpening knives.
 
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