A Terrible Secret

[Culhwch]

Actually I can easily see how children would make great spies.

I was working on the children not making great spies thing due to the fact that with everything Arya hears, she forgets half of it, muddles the rest, and understands zip. Of course, these other children may be highly trained (for instance to quickly write everything they hear), but I still think they have some other use.

And, yeah, I was going with the Tywin marrying a cousin thing to explain Tyrion, or just plain bad luck in genetics.

 

[hodor]

Hmmm, unless there is a better theory on Tyrion I am sticking with him having them mother Martin tells us. As I recall she died while giving birth to him.

 

[Culhwch]

There's no debate on who his mother was. (Although that would make an interesting argument...) Just whether Tywin or the Mad King sired the Imp. And I'm for Tywin.

 

[jnr_turtle]

There's no debate on who his mother was. (Although that would make an interesting argument...) Just whether Tywin or the Mad King sired the Imp. And I'm for Tywin.

Yeah. I doubt Tywin would hesitate to kill Tyrion if there was any doubt on who sired him, especially if he loved her as much as he seemed to have. Kinda makes me wonder what kind of person Lady Joanna was...

 

[Fitz]

There's no debate on who his mother was. (Although that would make an interesting argument...) Just whether Tywin or the Mad King sired the Imp. And I'm for Tywin.

sorry, i must have missed some hint when i read the books. was there something said about the Mad King being Tywin's father?

 

[hodor]

Um no... lol. Or did you mean Tyrion? We were just contemplating reasons for Tyrion's deformity. However, it is not a conversation I like to put to theories. I put stock in the idea that what you see is what you get when it comes to this. Not EVERYTHING in the book can be a "more than meets the eye" (jeez I love saying that it brings me back to the Transformer days) thing. Interesting to see all the ideas and theories out there though.

 

[Fitz]

ahh!!! yes sorry, i did mean Tyrion... =P

 

[red_temple]

I'd tell you, but then I'd have to cut out your tongue.

That one earned a serious Diet Coke thru the nose LOL!!! Thanks... Now everyone here at work is staring at me.

 

[AryaUnderfoot]

Haha glad to be of service, red_temple. I did that on purpose so that everyone at your work could see your true colors.

I hope your nose heals.

 

[red_temple]

Still a bit fizzy when I inhale, but I'll survive....

 

[Boaz]

I rather like the idea of Tyrion Targaryen.

Aerys, wounded that people thought Tywin was the ruler (remember Stannis' story) and filled with lust for Joanna, took Joanna by force while Tywin's attention was elsewhere. And as for the deformity, mayhaps (now I'm Lord of the crossing!) Joanna was given some "medicine" by her maester to terminate the pregnancy, but the "medicine" failed. Hoster Tully's maester definitely knew about this "medicine."

 

[Niolani]

I'm wondering what terrible secret Ilyn Payne would know that he can't simply communicate via writing, just like Varys' little birds? I think he just had a big mouth at the wrong time.

Well now thanks to aFfC we know that Ilyn is illiterate, so if he did know a secret he can't tell anyone through speech or writing. I think maybe he was made mute because of his remark.

 

[Boaz]

I think I read, in ASOIAF of course, since my last post on this thread that Ilyn's tongue was taken for a jest he made that suggested that Tywin was the real ruler of the Seven Kingdoms. If I am correct, then Payne was not mutilated over a secret but over Aery's fragile ego.

But I still like my theory (I admit it has no basis in fact whatsoever... it's pure speculation) that Aerys was incensed over Payne's comment and decided to prove that he was more of a king than Tywin... so Aerys tried to cuckold Tywin, but Joanna would have none of it... so Aerys took her by force... Joanna, knowing that if Tywin knew of her rape, decided to terminate the pregnancy herbally rather than plunge the realm into war... but the "seed is strong" with the Targaryens and the fetus was not aborted, but malformed... so Joanna is the one with the terrible secret... and I think that Varys would have known this.

 

[AryaUnderfoot]

I think I read, in ASOIAF of course, since my last post on this thread that Ilyn's tongue was taken for a jest he made that suggested that Tywin was the real ruler of the Seven Kingdoms. If I am correct, then Payne was not mutilated over a secret but over Aery's fragile ego.

Yeah, I realized that after posting... still, I'll be Ilyn's seen quite a bit that could end with some heads rolling, etc.

Joanna, knowing that if Tywin knew of her rape, decided to terminate the pregnancy herbally rather than plunge the realm into war... but the "seed is strong" with the Targaryens and the fetus was not aborted, but malformed... so Joanna is the one with the terrible secret... and I think that Varys would have known this.

Huh, I never knew that abortion medicines resulted in "little people..." Sorry, couldn't pass that up. It is quite a theory.

By the way, was it ever confirmed whether or not Tyrion was born with a tail?

 

[Boaz]

First, it's a crackpot theory. Second, I know nothing about conception. Well, I do remember one thing... it's what Jon told Arya.

As for the tail, the Maester of Casterly Rock lopped it off and sent it to the Citadel for study. Rumor has it that the tail was placed in a jar of dragon embryonic fluid... the current whereabouts of the jar are unknown.

If you find this post humorous, good. If not, then I'll suffer the flames.

 

[Tyranus]

Could be that generations of Tagaryen incest resulted in the deformities present in Tyrion (if indeed Joanna was raped by Aerys), not any sort of abortional "medicine". I would venture to guess that any sort of abortion attempt would have worked, unless the Maester intentionally gave Joanna something that would not work. Inbreeding would prove a better suggestion, though it seems strange that the deformities would manifest it a non-incestuous coupling, but not in incestuous coupling (besides the whole madness bit.)

 

[YOSSARIAN]

Stop being "humorous"-people are trying to have a serious discussion about a fictional dwarf.

(You just got Flam'd!)