Quick Fire Questions (A Place to Ask and Answer)

[TheDustyZebra]

Don't tell Bob!

 

[Culhwch]

What's the proper punctuation to use when a character picks up something and reads it both aloud and in their head? Double quotation marks, single, italics? Currently I'm using double quotation marks in normal dialogue and italics for thoughts.

Great prices on spotted elephants, he read.

'Great prices on spotted elephants', he read.

"Great prices on spotted elephants", he read.

If he is reading it aloud, treat it as any other piece of dialogue - therefore, either the second or the third, depending on whether you've used single or double quotes throughout. Also, the comma always always always goes inside the quotes:

'Great prices on spotted elephants,' he read.

 

[alchemist]

Just to confuse the issue, I don't like no. 2 at all, but maybe that's because I don't like single quotation marks. I say no. 1 for thinking and no. 3 for reading aloud.

 

[David Evil Overlord]

Don't tell Bob!

'As you know, Bob,' he said, raising his phone to read from the screen, '"Great prices on spotted elephants"'.

I see your double quotation marks, and raise you one.

 

[Ursa major]

If the character is reading the words out loud, it should be punctuated like any dialogue. (Note that in the following examples, I'm assuming that double quotes (" ") are used for dialogue and single quotes (' ') are used for quoted dialogue and quotes. Some authors use them, quite properly, the other way round.)


It would perhaps be clear if the character says that he's reading it:

"It reads, 'Great prices on spotted elephants,'" he said.

He read it out loud. "Great prices on spotted elephants."

In the first example, he's quoting within dialogue, hence the two levels of quotation mark. In the second example, he's just saying the words, so the second level isn't needed.


By the way, I'm not entirely sure about this, so don't quote me....

 

[Arthur_Connelly]

Thanks. But what happens when he's just reading it to himself, but not aloud?

I could just write:

He read the flyer advertising great prices on spotted elephants at the local loxodontal emporium.

 

[Warren_Paul]

If he is not reading out loud then the normal way would be to go with italics, no quote marks.

Great prices on spotted elephants, he read.

or as you just suggested, no internal thoughts at all. - Internal thoughts seems to be a topic of the day.

 

[David Evil Overlord]

Alas, I cannot have a spotted elephant in my room. It would clash horribly with the striped wallpaper.

 

[David Evil Overlord]

A question for the ladies -- if you were waiting for your new boyfriend to say "I love you" for the first time, would you be very, very mad if he said it by text?

 

[HareBrain]

A question for the ladies -- if you were waiting for your new boyfriend to say "I love you" for the first time, would you be very, very mad if he said it by text?

Ah, these questions used to start "I have a friend ...", now it's "In my novel ..."

 

[Warren_Paul]

A question for the ladies -- if you were waiting for your new boyfriend to say "I love you" for the first time, would you be very, very mad if he said it by text?

hmm, you really have to ask?

 

[Hex]

Assuming you're not asking for Other Reasons, DEO (in which case I'd advise a face to face declaration with lots of eye contact), I don't think I'd have a problem with it, especially if I was a teenager.

It kind of depends on the stage of the relationship but that early stage when everything is wonderful and he's perfect and you're walking into door frames just thinking about the way he chews the end of a pen (or whatever) and absolutely knowing that he's much much too good for you and there's no way he could really like you as much as you like him etc etc. then I think he could pretty much get away with anything.

And a text is a modern equivalent of a love letter. It's there and it's written down and you can look at it again and again (and again).

If you're a bit annoyed with him and inclined to be irritated at anything he does (in which case, I don't hold out much hope for the relationship) then I suppose a declaration of love by text would be potentially irritating.

If he wrote 'i luv u' or some horrible equivalent, though, then I would be appalled at the idea that someone I liked could bring himself to use that sort of language (but that might be just me).

 

[The Judge]

It would surely depend on the woman involved. A 16 year old who lives her life on Twitter and FaceBook would probably be delighted at receiving any declaration of love, and no doubt would immediately send a copy of the text to all her friends (?if that is that possible?) hoping it would go viral. A 50 year old who is just embarking on a relationship after several years of widowhood/post-divorce depression might be somewhat less thrilled. A plain girl who has never had a boyfriend will be more easily pleased than a stunning girl who has played the field since she was 14. A stay-at-home mother might react differently to a professional woman used to getting what she wants when she wants it.

 

[subtletylost]

I've been reading Wizard's First Rule and I noticed something. Terry didn't edit his book very well. There are blatant errors everywhere. In spelling and grammar and in how he addresses his characters. Literally in one section I read (it was about three paragraphs) he addressed the villain ten different ways, and it wasn't in dialogue either. The editing or lack thereof has made me have to go back and read the passages I just read over like three times because I am confused by them. I like the story but should I give up trying to read it until I have more time?

In my story I have a character who is normally quiet and I want her to have a sudden outburst because an author didn't edit good enough. Has this ever happened to you? (Reading a book that wasn't edited very good and you either wanted to or did throw it against a wall?)

A question for the ladies -- if you were waiting for your new boyfriend to say "I love you" for the first time, would you be very, very mad if he said it by text?

YES​

excuse that but I am a 16 year old girl and I would literally throw either my phone or a sizable book at the guy I like if he admitted he loved my via text message. That might just be me but I'd rather he said it in person much more personal.

 

[alchemist]

Ah, these questions used to start "I have a friend ...", now it's "In my novel ..."

I laughed out loud.

Sorry...ROFLMAO.


@fishii: I have no personal experience of someone editing my work but if I pay someone to do something and it turns out that I'd have been better doing it myself, I would be entitled to be angry. You just need to make sure the anger is "in-character" enough for your character.

 

[Abernovo]

Not a girl, David, but perhaps it depends upon whether this is the modern equivalent of the love note/letter, in which you (sorry, your character) might just get away with it in some circumstances. I still think it should be more personal, though, but I'm a little old-fashioned that way. It is not under any circumstances to be used as a Valentine's card substitute, though. Such use may result in impaired walking capabilities, with justification.

fishii, I have thrown a book at a wall before, although not for poor editing. I've felt like it a couple of times, though. Normally, it makes me consider giving up reading the darned thing, although I have occasionally vocalised my feelings (in a calm way, of course, ahem). An angry outburst about the poor quality sounds believable to me.

 

[Warren_Paul]

In my story I have a character who is normally quiet and I want her to have a sudden outburst because an author didn't edit good enough. Has this ever happened to you? (Reading a book that wasn't edited very good and you either wanted to or did throw it against a wall?)

As writers, mistakes become more apparent to us. It leads to not being able to enjoy the piece as much as if we were average readers who generally don't know any better.

I personally don't get angry over it, but I've heard of others who get very frustrated with mistakes in the books they are reading, to the point that they just can't read it.

As a proof of point, I don't remember seeing spelling mistakes or grammatical errors in Wizard's First Rule, but I read it years ago. I'd probably notice them if I was to read it again now.

*Goes away to pull Wizard's First Rule off his bookshelf*

 

[Mouse]

A question for the ladies -- if you were waiting for your new boyfriend to say "I love you" for the first time, would you be very, very mad if he said it by text?

My sort-of (but currently not) partner of three years text me Christmas eve just gone with an 'I love you.' First time he'd said it. And it was after a week of being a complete arse so it was proceeded by 'I know I've been an arse but.'

My response was 'don't say that in a text.'

So not mad, exactly, but not very impressed.

Fishii, I read a book recently where the dialogue wasn't punctuated correctly. Drove me mad. I didn't throw the book, but I did shake it angrily.

 

[David Evil Overlord]

Thanks, guys. The characters in question are in love, but the relationship has...a few hurdles for them to overcome. At this point, they are both being arses.

I thought it was reasonable to have her want to throw something at him for not saying it face to face with plenty of eye contact. Nice to know that at least one real sixteen year old girl agrees with my fictional sixteen year old girl.

 

[Mouse]

What does it feel like when you faint? I've never fainted. If a character was about to faint, how would it happen? I know the whole light-headed, dizziness thing. But could they try to speak, for example, then just pass out?