I'm with Judge, this is a very, very good early draft - I wish my first drafts were this good. Some more smoothing and editing at the start to ease me into the scene more, but when the action starts you had me. This is very good. I like the back story you described in your later posts, this is a promising idea so keep at it.
Well done on your 2,000th, its a good one. Hope your feeling better too.
Well done on your 2,000th, its a good one. Hope your feeling better too.
