I have to agree about the immersive quality of fantasy but I don't think that's a bad thing.
I don't either, and I'm not sure anyone has said it is. I can still get immersed in a fantasy novel -- maybe not as often or as deep as when I was younger, but I still feel it when I get it, and often hunger for it when I don't. Nor, speaking only for myself, am I criticising anyone's reaction to a book or their right to have it.
All I was saying (I think) is that we have a way of rating books -- the five/ten-star system -- that is too crude to differentiate between the various ways different types of readers use it, or the different types of things they might be expressing with it.
Don't worry about your post, by the way. It was well-expressed and (as far as I'm concerned) a valid part of the discussion, though it's probably just as well it wasn't any more heated. You should generally be fine, though, as long as you take issue with someone's argument rather than the member him/herself.