I let a little boy live in my book and now he has killed my story!

[Ajid]

But what if the younger brother walks in and say, "I noticed that the Emporor can't breathe very well if you fill his air intakes with Legos and gummy bears. Here, I have a bunch in my pocket."

That's why you don't get to come to the storm troopers ball. Comments like that.

 

[ErikB]

It seems to me that having a younger sibling that he is responsible for adds to the tension that the protagonist faces. Trying perhaps unsuccessfully to stash the siblings away while he fights only to learn that they have made their way to where he is against his wishes. Also allows for the siblings to be leveraged against him by the antagonist forces he is facing.

The little brother could greatly enhance tension and suffering for your protagonist and the more that a protagonist suffers, the greater their triumph when they at last overcome their antagonist or achieve their goal.

 

[Ajid]

Couldn't agree more there is a real opportunity to add depth here.

 

[Hex]

Nine year olds aren't babies. They're pretty fast and strong and capable. Your older characters might underestimate him but the little brother could make himself useful and be a source of tension as well.

 

[Toby Frost]

If he's going to be nothing more than an impediment, I'd cut him. But if he stays and he's done well, he will lend a great amount to the story and make it more than just a revenge drama. He could well be a useful helper as well as the conscience of the story instead of (or as well as) an impediment that needs to be rescued. If I remember rightly, there's an old film about a deadly samurai who has to protect a small child (in a pram?). Something like that was done in The Walking Dead and the computer game The Last of Us.

But, if you can't make it work, or it isn't the story you want to tell, I'd suggest cutting him, as he'll only be a nuisance otherwise (depending on the circumstances of the story).

 

[Vladd67]

 

[Toby Frost]

Baby Cart to Hades is truly an epic title. Those are words I would never have put together.

 

[paranoid marvin]

Can't he just go off to live with an aunt or uncle? Being a minor he has no choice, whilst a 17 year old has.

 

[RX-79G]

Is there not a sitter available?

 

[Steven Sorrels]

Is it bad that I'd probably kill him off, thus adding fuel to the MC's motivations for revenge?

 

[Phyrebrat]

Whenever I see a show or read a book where someone has to guard or look after a helpless babe I get immediately turned off.

It seems to me such an unoriginal set up, predictable and unrealistic. It's like when you're playing an outstanding video game and then you get an 'escort the freighter out of the region' mission. You know that freighter's gonna burn...

If you've handled the kid and situations well so that it's an interesting set up, I'd say stick with it, but I sense that's unlikely bearing in mind this thread title.

Pack him off somewhere... he could make a meaningful return later - even as a vengeful nemesis.

pH

 

[Ursa major]

and, the thought of my main character fighting while his little brother is is just gnawing at me

And it may (should?) be gnawing at your MC and at the readers. And there is nothing wrong with this at all; quite the opposite.

Oh, and if the little guy is 'waiting back on some world for him to come home', there's not much chance of him suddenly appearing in the middle of the battle, is there?


Look at some successful TV crime series. Often relatives appear out of nowhere to give greater emotional intensity to, or to create some or other moral dilemma in, the episode and then disappear. They may or may not be seen again (depending on how useful they've been to the plot of the episode or emotional arc of the season/series).

 

[newstar33]

"This kid has no place on the battle field and, the thought of my main character fighting while his little brother is waiting back on some world for him to come home is just gnawing at me."

How about making your MC fight for brother?
Little brother is with the opponent of the MC. He can end up with the opponent willingly or unwillingly:
willingly(coz he wanna prove himself too, doesn't believe in what the MC is fighting for and all that kind of stuff) OR
unwillingly(kidnapping, mind-control, manipulation, deceit anything can be used)
Maybe this will give your MC another motive to win the battle.

 

[hopewrites]

I wouldn't hesitate to have the li'l bro tag along. 9yr olds are whiley and if the world is that crazy boarding school might be worse.

Is there a reason he can't stay with his sister? you mentioned she's not involved in the dangerous aspects of world saving...

I remember being a kid and finding stories like The Boxcar Children more believable than Nancy Drew. Because! the siblings stuck together and had to balance each others strengths and weaknesses.

 

[RX-79G]

OP, have you considered making the brother not real? There, but not really there solves many of your problems, adds a psychological or mystical element and excuses the brother appearing almost anywhere without real concerns about safety. Not that the main character will feel or act that way, until later when he understands the boy is either dead or never existed.

 

[Steven Sorrels]

OP, have you considered making the brother not real?

If done well, that could be a fantastic twist. If not, it could kill the entire story. Tread carefully.

 

[VKALFIERI]

But how old were the characters in The Lion, the witch and the wardrobe? These youngsters did many great things. Sure, not straightaway, but they did eventually do some pretty great things.

Why not send your 9 y.o away for a while and have him come back later in your story or at a certain juncture when he has more to do?

 

[JDaly]

The kid is an Achilles heel, your nemesis kidnaps him thus strengthening the main character's resolve, he's lost four family members and darned if he will lose another. It could further the story by coinciding with his original intent but beware could also result in his focus shifting from the plot to his brother.

 

[Brian G Turner]

I decided to let his sister and small brother live. The parents and 2 older siblings perish.

You mention a futuristic setting, so I'm wondering where their equivalent of social services are with regards to these minors.

 

[StuartBurchell]

Or the kid could unintentionally betray his older brother? Or the main character is given a choice towards the end, save his kid brother or his girlfriend (presuming he has one) but the one he doesn't save dies, preferably horribly. If he saves his bro but girlfriend dies, he becomes resentful of his brother which drives a wedge between the brothers that isn't resolved. If he saves girlfriend, extra motivation for defeating bad guy.

Or the kid could turn to the dark side....