DISCUSSION THREAD -- December 2016 75-word Writing Challenge

[Phyrebrat]

Well I think you should be ashamed of your potty mouth. And everyone who voted for your filthy literature should be banned. As should everyone else for not even giving me one vote. My worst month.

Abernovo and HB are excluded of my banning request for their kind mentions

pH

Ps. Congratu-bl***y-lations

 

[Peter V]

Wrong.

ETA: and I'll explain why, now I've thought about it. The NSS line is deflationary, if that's the right word, after the longer, formal line from Holmes. And that's where the comedy lies. If you'd had them the other way round, it would have worked to some degree, but the deflation thingy would have been sandwiched between two more formal lines, and part of its effect would have been lost, I think.

I agree with HareBrain. Imo whilst Alimentary would have been a fitting last line and as such better than the "no sh*t" if used in isolation, the two together work perfectly and are definitely greater than the sum of their parts.

 

[Vaz]

Congrats, TJ!

 

[Ursa major]

I think the last lines were the right way round, TJ.

I haven't got a well-worked out reason like HB's. It's just my gut feeling....

 

[Parson]

Congratulations @The Judge --- Your last line reminded me of high school days, but we were rather reticence to use course language ---- I suppose that will mark me as coming from fundamentalist evangelical stock, --- But we would say after some ungraceful move "Nice play Shakespeare." The line you used I first heard in college.

 

[Cory Swanson]

Congrats to the Judge. Note to self: think of more puns

In all seriousness, this month had me stumped. Though I like my idea, I totally see why it only garnered one vote (thanks Hoppy). It is a direct reference to Dan Simmon's novel, The Terror, about the failed Franklin expedition to the North Pole and his fantastical ideas about its demise. I combined that with a dream I had years ago about a giant monster made of light that was searching the city (Denver) that I could see from my bedroom window as a kid.

Clearly, it doesn't have legs for a 75, but a living aurora borealis? What do you guys think? Does it merit expansion?

By the way, the Dan Simmons novel is a masterwork. I highly recommend it.

 

[Ursa major]

Your last line reminded me of high school days, but we were rather reticence to use course language

That must have made passing the exams difficult... which would likely cause some, on seeing their results, to use coarse language....

 

[nixie]

congratulations TJ

 

[TheDustyZebra]

Yeah, I think those lines were the right way around. Obviously, since it worked.

Mine came from the idea that Rudolph's nose was a pixie light -- I gave up actually having it be Rudolph, because that seemed odd, and instead had him kidnapped and replaced by a pixie, so the sleigh could be "pixie-led" off course for nefarious purposes. It took a while to figure out who, in the right time frame, would do that, although why seemed easy enough -- to get the goods.

I don't know if the character I chose is actually that well-known in British history, or if he just shows up in the offbeat sorts of places where I encountered him. Judge Blackborough was apparently a fellow who discovered that he could line his pockets nicely if he simply jailed innocent people as well as guilty ones, because he collected bail money on all of them. So he seemed like a guy who would steal Santa's bag.

My characters were one of Santa's elves and a pixie, who the judge forced to cooperate in the heist by jailing their wives. The elf had to kidnap Rudolph, and then the pixie took his place to light the way, so as to run the sleigh to the judge's house.

It only occurred to me later that Rudolph wasn't a character in literature until much later than this time frame, but that doesn't necessarily mean he hadn't been around all that time and we just didn't know about him until the song. Right? Right. Sure.

 

[Ihe]

Aaahgh, didn't vote this month. Soooorrryyy. Too busy. Promise to do better this month.