May 2019: 75-Word Story Challenge—READ FIRST POST

[Teresa Edgerton]

RULES:

Write a story inspired by the chosen theme and genre in no more than 75 words, not including the title.

ONE entry per person.

NO links, commentary or extraneous material in the posts, please -- the stories must stand on their own.

WHEN WRITING YOUR STORY, PLEASE REMEMBER THIS IS A FAMILY-FRIENDLY FORUM.

All stories Copyright 2019 by their respective authors who grant the Chronicles Network the non-exclusive right to publish them here.

The complete rules can be found at RULES FOR THE WRITING CHALLENGES.
Contest ends at 11:59 pm GMT, May 23, 2019
Voting ends at 11:59 pm GMT, May 28, 2019

You do not have to submit a story in order to vote -- in fact, we encourage all Chrons members to take part in choosing a winner.

The Magnificent Prize:

The Dignified Congratulations/Grovelling Admiration of Your Peers and the challenge of choosing next month's theme and genre.

Theme:

Animals


Genre:

Tall Tales


This thread to be used for entries only. Please keep all comments to the DISCUSSION THREAD.

We invite (and indeed hope for) lively discussion and speculation about the stories as they are posted, as long as it doesn't involve the author explaining the plot.

** Please do not use the "Like" button in this thread! **​

 

[Ashleyne]

MUM THE UNDEFEATED

Spider's twenty times the size of her head. Foam froths up to her belly, spilling from his mandible.

With every beat, her heart bulges large enough to bash her own chin.

Her shout hammers, a pneumatic drill: “SPIIIIIDEEEEER!”

Mum bounces into the room, boxing gloves melded from diamonds. She gives a left, then a right. Spider's got no chance.

Mum won't kill him, though. The spider paramedics are already here, strapping him to a stretcher.

 

[Cathbad]

Our Hero


“Thirteen, you say?”

Frido nodded. “Three with a bat, two by knife, seven with just my teeth!”

There was something amiss with that. “And you didn’t get a scratch?”

“Pffft! No feline ever got the best of me!”

“Yeah, but thirteen kills in one day?”

“Sorry, Spot – I hear my owner calling.” Frido turned and ran home.

I was left to ponder whether Frido was the Greatest Hero in Dog History… or just a fibber.

 

[Pedro Del Mar]

The Animals Went In Two By Two

"First I saw two horses go by, then I saw two ducks, followed by two pigs and two cows!"
"What, just walking side by side?"
"Yes, exactly like that. Two by two, down to that monstrosity of a ship Noah's building! Look, there's two sheep heading across just now."
"That's strange, I myself saw two elephants going in!"
"Elephants? You're just making that up. Is that a spot of rain? I think I'll go indoors."

 

[HareBrain]

THE HEIGHT OF VANITY


Giraffe was king because no one could reach his crown to take it.

Cunning Fox plotted. To Giraffe he proclaimed, ‘What lovely lashes!’

Giraffe sighed with pleasure.

Softer, Fox said, ‘What beautiful horns.’

Giraffe bent to hear Fox properly, nodding.

Fox whispered, ‘What exquisite reticulation,’ so quietly Giraffe had to bend right down to hear. The crown fell from his head —

— and squashed Fox dead!

So Lion ate them both and took the crown himself.

 

[Danny McG]

Outback Override.

Thud! His powerful tail slammed into his prey’s unaware back and sent it screaming into deep, dark water.

Hunkering down to gloat and savour the drowning he moaned in frustration as yet again ‘The Moral Expectations Compulsion' overrode his body.

Through the red dust and swarms of flies he bounded resignedly to the campsite and started clicking loudly.

“What’s that Skippy? Joey’s trapped down the well? Okay Cobber, we’re coming, good on yer, Mate!”

 

[Cat's Cradle]

Destiny’s Banquet

The parents of Manifred Destiny fed him 20 oxen daily; ‘twas never enough.
His people spread westward, hunting and butchering to sustain him.

He was always ravenous. Crossing the Plains, Destiny devoured every buffalo. The Black Hills’ elks were spitted and roasted, and for fun, he clove those Hills with his battleaxe Freedom, gilding prospectors’ sluices.

Destiny ended his days rassling grizzlies beside the Pacific, having tamed the continent, and liberated Eden from its occupiers.

 

[Victoria Silverwolf]

The Escape

An old medicine wagon carried Professor Nocturne and Peter the Dwarf one step ahead of the angry residents of the last town they visited.

“Did I ever tell you how I was captured by an eagle?” The little man lit his cigar. “Crazy bird carried me off to her nest. Thought I was her baby. Spent a month there before I got out.”

“Why so long?”

“Took her a while to teach me to fly.”

 

[Calliopenjo]

Royalty

Look at her, as she pushes away her bowl. She screamed before the refrigerator opened to reveal a succulent piece of fish. She jumped inside and began eating it. A queen amongst us as she demanded her food raw and untouched.

Spit, hissed, and stabbed anyone or anything that dared to come close to her prize. Only she had a right to it as if she believed herself to be the queen.

 

[Daysman]

Glasshouse

Midsummer, we'd raid the end cap orchards.

The cider maker's drones could never fly fast enough to catch us all.

One year, we found a glasshouse packed with acacia and apricot trees.

And a giraffe.

Above a gargantuan pot, its trunk branched three times, each neck supporting a narrow triangular head with bulbous black eyes and a sinuous grasping tongue.

It grazed on nearby fruit and leaves.

Closest thing to an animal I've ever seen.

 

[elvet]

An Imagined Conversation Between a Wolf and a Pug


“So what are you exactly?”

“I’m a dog ...... a relative of yours, actually.”

“No way! How do you hunt?”

“I don’t. Food is left in my bowl, and I’m fed treats for being cute.”

“Get out! That’s crazy talk. Where’s your nose? What about your breathing?”

“I am bred to look like this.”

“Now you’re just being silly.”

“It highlights my big, brown, adorable eyes.”

“But you can’t even look straight ahead!”

“Everyone’s a critic.”

 

[L.L.Lotte]

A Mouse's Grand Ruse

“Just a bite, please?” Angus eyed the peanuts with envy. “I’ll tell you where there’s cheese the size of a house!”

“Then why don’t you go eat that then?

“It’s guarded by ten cats.”

“Hah! No cats can catch me!” Merle left in search of the treasure.

Minutes later... “There was no cheese, and there weren’t no ten cats either!”

“Oh, there wasn’t?” Angus patted his bloated stomach.

There was no trace of the peanuts…

 

[nixie]

New Addition
​

Rover noticed Captain had some nasty scratches.

“What happened?”

“A monster has come to stay, it’s horrible, never seen one so big"

They ran around together, chasing the ball the hooman threw. Captain told Rover all about the monstrous creature bigger than Samson who’d taking up residence in his house, stealing his basket.

“C'mon Captain home time"

“See you tomorrow if I’m still alive"

The tiny kitten looked out window.

“Oh good dog’s back".

 

[reiver33]

How I Met Your Mother

“A giraffe? What the hell, Ursula?”

Huge eyes gazed down from behind flared nostrils. “And you’re a lion. Talk about wish fulfilment.”

We were in Savanna, an ‘immersive virtual reality experience’. Not your traditional first date, I grant you, but she’d vetoed every other suggestion.

“I’m in love with you.” It just came out.

“You’re an idiot.”

“I can be both.”

Ursula looked at me for a long moment, then laughed.

“You’ll need a ladder.”

 

[Alex The G and T]

Almost True Story

In our Peaceable Kingdom, we're accustomed to watching Cougars lie down with Brush Bunnies, Dog playing tag with Bears and 'Coons; and Skunks holding their "water" with a cheery, "Hello."

Never gave credence to Sasquatch, until he pulled up a chair, one evening, out on the patio.
We poured him a glass of wine.

He said that we're pretty good neighbors; but could we, please, not drop trees onto his nest when we're cutting firewood?

 

[Peter V]

Post Apocalypse

"Since Sissarosk returned from her travels, she's been saying disconcerting things."

"Ignore your egg-sister. She's always been prone to flights of fancy." Brrrurghsaa casually cleaned an antenna.

"She says there were creatures before us that built great things. That they ruined the world with fire."

"Not so great that they are still here!" Brrrurghsaa rattled his abdominal plates in irritation. "Just a tale to scare nymphs. Roachkind has always been and always will be."

 

[Artoriarius]

Solely Written for the Porpoise of Punning

"Dude, I'm floating along, you know?" Steve Sunfish said. "And then I see an awesome worm! I eat it, and suddenly I'm getting pulled up way fast, and there's no water, and there's this giant alien looking at me! It looks at me and says something, and it throws me back. Can you believe it, dude?"

Marcie Minnow thought for a moment, then said, "That's a crappie story, dude."

 

[Marvin]

Hiding in plain sight

Joyfully I rummage through Grandfathers stuff.

“Pops, what’s this?”
He turns, adjusting his glasses.
“Ah! Careful with that, it’s devilishly sharp.”
In the fading light it shimmers with a mesmerising iridescence.
Still lost in its depths, “Breathtaking! Wherever did you find it?”

“Long ago, far from here, I watched a mother tear it from her new born foal and toss it angrily away. The others in the herd then trampled it deep into the earth.”

 

[Shyrka]

Tall Animals, Taller Stories

“...and there it was, a Giraffe!”

“It was clearly in some distress. Poor animal had contrived to get itself stuck – attempting to feast on Farnworthy’s wisteria, no doubt.”

“Pushing was of no avail, so I quickly scaled the beast’s neck and began to push. After much groaning and straining it broke free. I, naturally, fell backward, through the open window.”

“And that, Lord Montague, is how I came to be in your daughter’s bedchamber.”

 

[Luiglin]

How the cat got his meow

At the dawn, when Man was young, he asked the animals to do his bidding. Horse, agreed to carry. Dog, agreed to hunt.

Man spoke to Cat. “Will you not kill Rat who steals my food?”

Cat, the most erudite of the animals, licked a paw as he considered Man, gave a yawn as he considered his future.

“Meow,” he said, thence smugly content for life.

Which, my Beloved, as you well know, means ‘whatever’.