May 2019: 75-Word Story Challenge—READ FIRST POST

[Dr_R_Dizzle]

Well I'll be a...

"... and by the time you realise they're here, it's too late. The fruit trees disappear, and the water of the great river turns to poison. Slowly, the forest dies."

"We'll fight them off, Uncle!", cried the little chimps.

"Oh, you'll try", whispered the old orangutan. "But they have magic sticks. They point at you and then... BANG!"

Uncle chuckled as his startled audience fled.

"Stop scaring them, dear", sighed Auntie. "Everyone knows hoo-muns aren't real".

 

[Hummus]

Beatrice Beast and the Scar Crusades

How I got my scars?

Ankles - alligator, the Amazons, ’74. (The flip side of hiking barefoot.)
Stomach - some bloke with machete, ’80s Mexico. (******* surprised me!)
Lip - lion, Kenya, ’72. (Fist-fight of the decade century.)
Right wrist - anaconda, ’68. (Made better boots than it bit, that snake.)
Left wrist - self-inflicted ...

Oh, sweet irony. The huntress hunted by her own instincts.
'Guess they don’t call me the Beast for nothing…

 

[Hugh]

Raven-Home

This is a story of when I was young and the world was younger still.

I didn’t see the raven land beside me, but I could hear its message as clearly as I hear you.

It was a summons to Raven-Home.

That’s where I met the Raven King

And those two feathers on the mantel are symbols of the peace agreed between our families for now and forever.

That’s why ravens guard our souls.

 

[Vaz]

The Gift of Man

The animals of Great Wood were saddened by the demise of man. He was too weak. At a meeting beneath Stone Council they decided to help by each giving him a gift.

Owl gave him knowledge.
Fox gave him cunning.
Panther gave him stealth.
Tiger taught him how to hunt.

The animals are almost all gone, now. Man rules in the wood and he has given the animals a great gift of his own.

Fear.

 

[Starbeast]

Wamakhaskan: A Lakota Monster Legend​

Summer 1975

Trekking deep in an Illinois forest, alone, I saw...Wamakhaskan, the Bear Killer. It caught my scent, I was too afraid to move. It had blazing brown eyes, spotted dirty fur...yellow dagger teeth. With a deep growl, it crept patiently toward me....then leaped. Spears and arrows struck it. As it died, my grandfather scolded me, I cried hugging him. Later I learned, that creature, was one of the last, American Lions.

 

[chrispenycate]

Fox Hunt

Fox, stalking military training field
Twixt unexploded ordinance on tippy toes
Seeks poacher's now discarded snare
Explosive butchered pre-disjointed hare
Not even yet polluted by crows

When, transporting his lifeless prey
Another 'unexploded' triggers.
Pebbly, dusty golf-links spray
Immaculate red coat disfigures.
Wash and brush-up Reynard's pride entails
Fur clean, ears pointed, the tallest of tails.

Hightails to vixen nursing squirming brood.
Delivering survival food.

​

 

[jackwinabox56]

A "Little" Adventure

Age 6, Wandering the woods, fearless
Suddenly, Dragonflies dive-bombed me
Clueless, I assumed "Monsters"
Ran terrified, tripped, landed hard
Awoke to Sunset, bruised
Sobbing " I wanna go home"
Ladybug landed on my nose
She whispered " I'll help you"
She took flight, was joined by a Firefly
Ladybug, Firefly guided me
Slalom-like thru the trees
I leaped happily onto my porch
They alighted the bannister, smiled
Bounding inside, I hollered
" Hi Mom! What's for dinner?"

 

[Ian Fortytwo]

Ham and Bacon.

Ham and Bacon sat comfortably in their seats acclimatizing to the surroundings. They were going to be famous forever if the experiment went smoothly. At this moment the speed was well within normal conditions, however soon the automated procedure would takeover and a new experience awaited.

They had left the Solar System behind and now the automated procedure kicked in. Within minutes they were travelling faster than light.

They became the most famous chimpanzees ever.

 

[Stable]

Panroachia​

“I know you love my stories really.”

“I know you love rambling about the space rangers.”

“Okay. One time, we went to a planet that had too much water. By the time the inhabitants had industrialised they’d melted aaaaaall their ice and flooded everything. The only things left were huge floating plastic clumps, covered in cockroaches. Because-“

His grandsprout chorused the familiar last words.

“No matter how far you go, the roaches got there first.”

 

[Tywin]

We All Knew They Could Play Poker

Blue was a good dog, but that damn fox kept getting into the henhouse. Smarts was what he needed.

So Farmer Riley borrowed Judge Smith’s chess set and taught that hound some strateegery.

A week later Blue nabbed that fox; lured him right in.

When the man from the bank came calling the next week, Riley knew what to do.

“Come on, Blue. Gonna go borrow us another game. Learn you to play some monopoly.”

 

[The Judge]

FELINE GREAT (or Cat-a-Strophe revisited)


Titanic paws, gigantic claws,
A tail to reach the moon.
With mien so proud, miaows so loud,
It’s like a sonic boom.

Tremendous fur, stupendous purr,
Thick whiskers twelve miles long,
And gem-bright eyes of wondrous size,
And teeth to dwarf King Kong.

I tell you plain, no doubts remain.
The nonpareil, that’s that!
The tallest tale – it’s off the scale!
A hyperbolic

Categoric​

Cataclysmic​

Catamount.​

The one, the true​

Magnifi-Cat!​

 

[Culhwch]

Fig. 1 - Songbirds of the Australian Rainforest

Currawong was surprised to find a little brown bird with extravagant tail feathers in the clearing. From the call, he’d expected a mate.

‘It wasn’t me,’ said the bird.

Whipbird was likewise surprised. No mate - just the little brown bird.

‘Not me.’

Butcherbird could barely contain his anger.

The little brown bird just shrugged.

Wise old Kookaburra sat above, watching it all. ‘Don’t you guys get it?’ he said, laughing. ‘He’s a Lyrebird!’

 

[M. Robert Gibson]

Gordan the Flatulent Barber Dragon

Having breakfasted on beans and sprouts, Gordan had just commenced his morning constitutional when his backside erupted with such ferocity that he escaped Earth's gravitational pull.

He orbited the galaxy awhile, eventually landing on Elipter, a planet inhabited with bewhiskered reptiles.

"Who're you?" they asked.

"I come to free you from facial hair tyranny. Behold! The Razor of Rebrab! Let the shaving begin!"

* * *

And that's why you never see an alien lizard with a moustache.

 

[MikeAnderson]

Shaolin Sloth

Shaolin Sloth fooled Slaying Mantis into pouncing hastily, using his un-deceptively slow movement to test the patience of the murderous Mantodea.

It worked.

Slaying Mantis flailed wildly, and was pummeled by the slowest 10 hit combo in recorded history.

“FINISH HIM!” Sensei Iron Toad croaked.

An uppercut that took 4 minutes to deploy sent Slaying Mantis plummeting into a moat of boiling Raid insecticide.

“SHAOLIN SLOTH WINS!”

“FATALITY!”

 

[Karn's Return]

Why Snakes Crawl On Their Bellies​

Long ago, Snake used to have wings. But he was mean to the other creatures of the forest, so old wise Rabbit decided to teach him a lesson, so he invited Snake to lunch.

“Where is the food?” Snake asked.

Rabbit pointed to a hole in the wall. So Snake removed his wings and crawled in. Rabbit threw the wings into the fire, and that is why snakes crawl on the ground.

 

[Nicole J. LeBoeuf]

New Neighbors

"What was all that hammering and sawing last night, Sister Wolf?"

"Three little pigs built a house next door. Took them eight hours to finish."

"Slow builders. What materials did they use?"

"Brick, Brother Wolf. And I know what you're thinking, so don't."

"Drat. I'd hoped for bacon. Well, we can still pay a neighborly visit."

But first they huffed and they puffed and they blew the breakfast dishes clean.

 

[drmatteri]

Blue

“I never should’ve cut them all down,” Paul said.

He watched the country from Pike’s Peak like Zeus on Olympus, scratching Babe’s big blue ears.

“We cleared the way for all them cities and farms, but now the planet’s dying.” He sighed. “We need to fix this before it’s too late.”

Babe mooed in agreement.

“Come on, old Blue.” Paul picked up his giant, double-bladed axe. “We got a lot of work to do.”

 

[Parson]

Pecos Parson, Visitation, the Wonder Horse, and the Big Snow
​

When the West needed saving; Pecos Parson brought grace.

Once, an 8-day blizzard blew across the plains. Nothing was moving. Pecos Parson saddled up Visitation to call on Widow Jones. They found her without food or firewood. She needed help.

Pecos and Visitation braved the blizzard again, pulled down a tree, killed a bear, and hauled it all in while singing “Amazing Grace.”

Everyone was saved; including all the animals for 10 miles around.

 

[Heijan Xavier]

New Bird Order

“What troubles you Novus?” Ordo asked.

Novus sighed. “Redbirds and Bluebirds kill each other over scraps rotting on the ground. Yet up here...”

Ordo placed his wing around Novus. “As long as they fight down there, our canopy is free and our bellies are full.” Licking his beak Ordo continued. “Speaking of which, what shall we have for dinner, Redbird or Bluebird?”

Seclorum, swept in silently behind them and whispered, “Can’t we have both?”

 

[mosaix]

The One That Got Away...

“He was a giant of a man. This big! And ferocious. Came right at me with his sword...” Tick-tock, tick-tock.

“You sure?” snigger

“…but nothing scares me. I was too quick for him. I lunged and bit his hand right off.” Tick-tock, tick-tock.

“We'd heard that young kid cut it off and fed it to you.” more sniggering

“Young kid?! Anyway, he won't escape me again. This big I tell you! You'll see.” Tick-tock, tick-tock.