Is This Better?

[Swank]

How's this for an idea. The two men start out drunk (the tall one drunker) and as they watch events they don't like unfolding from the hoverball they become more sober?

Drunk people can have serious discussions, if that's what is on their minds. You don't need to scrap everything - just make them sound drunk.

 

[Yozh]

Maybe you and I have hung around different drunks, Swank. There can be lively discussion amount the pleasantly buzzed, perhaps, but sloppy drunk? They might try, but if they do get into anything deep they won’t remember the next day.

 

[Lafayette]

Drunk people can have serious discussions, if that's what is on their minds. You don't need to scrap everything - just make them sound drunk.

Are you sure? Can you give some examples?

 

[Swank]

Are you sure? Can you give some examples?

Do you mean write your scene for you, or find and provide the book and page number where other authors have successfully done it?

I think you should try to write your scene with the faltering, distracted, spoonerism filled speech of drunks, but with a large part of the content circling around a serious topic. After you have written that dialogue, then you can decide if it is realistic or not.

But you have to actually do the work of writing it.