# As an alien would you visit Earth?



## DragonAether (Nov 18, 2017)

Pretend to be an alien of your choice. You can go to Earth within a blink, would you visit Earth or would you be aware of those humans and avoid Earth like you would avoid a bear in the forest? (or you would just nuke the planet)
In case you choose to land, what would you do? You know, kidnapping people, brainwash, control governments or other things.

Personally I would just nuke the planet.


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## mosaix (Nov 18, 2017)

99% of the planet is beautiful. 100% from space. Inhabitants of all kinds - fascinating. 

Technology advanced enough to get here would allow undetected visiting. 

Visit? Try stopping me.


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## Harpo (Nov 18, 2017)

I'd stay in the deep oceans where I feel most at home, and I'd lay eggs


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## HanaBi (Nov 18, 2017)

Either of the Poles for me. Seems like the simplest, safest and quietest option

Of course if I crash-landed and was buried under ice and subsequently dug up by a Norwegian science team after 100,000 years, I may feel slightly aggrieved.


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## chrispenycate (Nov 18, 2017)

You need to ask? I'm here, aren't I, and haven't bombed, vivisected, exterminated or otherwise annoyed any of the inhabitants yet. Certainly you're a touch primitive, and lack some empathy with other neighbouring species, but that's par for those few biotopes that generate sentient races - nobody can get ahead without a good dose of agressivity, and unless you destroy yourselves and your environment - unfortunately, quite a high probability - you're a fascinating study in contradictions.


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## TWErvin2 (Nov 18, 2017)

No reason not to visit, unless there are many more interesting planets to visit instead.


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## DragonAether (Nov 18, 2017)

TWErvin2 said:


> No reason not to visit, unless there are many more interesting planets to visit instead.


What about a planet made of spaghetti, or a planet with rivers and seas of coffee, or maybe a planet made of dreams.

Or a planet with free Netflix.


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## logan_run (Nov 18, 2017)

I would visit


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## nixie (Nov 18, 2017)

Like Chrispy I'm here and have only caused moderate chaos. Although I'm from an alternate reality not another planet.


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## DragonAether (Nov 18, 2017)

chrispenycate said:


> You need to ask? I'm here, aren't I, and haven't bombed, vivisected, exterminated or otherwise annoyed any of the inhabitants yet. Certainly you're a touch primitive, and lack some empathy with other neighbouring species, but that's par for those few biotopes that generate sentient races - nobody can get ahead without a good dose of agressivity, and unless you destroy yourselves and your environment - unfortunately, quite a high probability - you're a fascinating study in contradictions.





nixie said:


> Like Chrispy I'm here and have only caused moderate chaos. Although I'm from an alternate reality not another planet.


I smell some interdimensional alien conspiracy here.... You won't have my brain(there isn't that much either)!!!


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## Talysia (Nov 19, 2017)

I think I'd visit, but I'd definitely want to stay away from humans and their major settlements. There's so much beauty in the lands, seas and wildlife here that I'd just want to look at it all, like an alien David Attenborough.


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## Vertigo (Nov 19, 2017)

Funny how people focus on the bad in humans. Imagine we discovered an inhabited planet what would interest us the most? The beautiful pastoral scenes, the fascinating grazing herds of animals, the even more fascinating animals preying on them or the rather destructive but sentient dominant species. Of course we'd want to see it all but I guarantee study of the dominant sentient creatures would get the most funding, earn the most scientific awards and attract the most researchers.

It would be no contest, the aliens would want to study us; everything else as well, but us as the dominant sentient species would be the biggest draw.


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## farntfar (Nov 19, 2017)

We checked on the electoral register, before we bought the house.
There are no cylons for at least a hundred parsecs.


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## DragonAether (Nov 19, 2017)

farntfar said:


> We checked on the electoral register, before we bought the house.
> There are no cylons for at least a hundred parsecs.


I watched a couple of episodes of battlesta4 galactica, I really enjoyed ships' designs, but the overall plot didn't caught me very much.


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## BAYLOR (Nov 19, 2017)

No,  because I would know better then to visit a place weirder then me.


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## Cathbad (Nov 19, 2017)

Of course not!

I would _never_ visit for the sole purpose to recon the planet for invasion, thus adding this tiny blue planet to our Galactic Empire!

I mean.... Um.... maybe.


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## DragonAether (Nov 19, 2017)

Cathbad said:


> Of course not!
> 
> I would _never_ visit for the sole purpose to recon the planet for invasion, thus adding this tiny blue planet to our Galactic Empire!
> 
> I mean.... Um.... maybe.



Gods of Nibiru, sentient beings creators of mankind, I please you as one of the few believers of the Nibiru Precursors order. 
I'm here to speak at you as one of your child, that believes only in the truth. 
We, humans, your product, your sons, we failed, we didn't respected your willing, we are ready to be punished for our sins.

But I pray you to save those few people that seek the truth in your superior mind.


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## BAYLOR (Nov 19, 2017)

An Alien invasion Armada would have no chance against the Earth's great weapon Social Media.


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## Cathbad (Nov 19, 2017)

DragonAether said:


> But I pray you to save those few people that seek the truth in your superior mind.



Oh.... okay!!

sheesh


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## DragonAether (Nov 19, 2017)

Once I composed some prayers to lord Nibiru.


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## Toby Frost (Nov 19, 2017)

I think it depends on the sort of alien I was. If I was the sort that want to bring love and understanding to the galaxy, I'd stop on Earth just long enough to collect the dolphins and head right back home. On the other hand, if I was more inclined towards violence, hunting and skull-collection, I'd be sharpening my blades and practising my dirty laugh.


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## The Big Peat (Nov 21, 2017)

Toby Frost said:


> I think it depends on the sort of alien I was. If I was the sort that want to bring love and understanding to the galaxy, I'd stop on Earth just long enough to collect the dolphins and head right back home. On the other hand, if I was more inclined towards violence, hunting and skull-collection, I'd be sharpening my blades and practising my dirty laugh.



From what I understand dolphins are kinda nasty.


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## Danny McG (Nov 21, 2017)

I think I'd have to greedily devour a large number of the population while transmitting the location of this new restaurant to me friends


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## DragonAether (Nov 21, 2017)

Eat Cathbad first


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## Cathbad (Nov 22, 2017)

What did _I_ do wrong??


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## BAYLOR (Nov 22, 2017)

The Big Peat said:


> From what I understand dolphins are kinda nasty.



Friendly as Flipper they're not.


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## crystal haven (Nov 22, 2017)

Oh, I think I would definitely visit. But I'd make sure I had a towel with me, just in case.


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## Harpo (Nov 22, 2017)

Suzanne Jackson said:


> Oh, I think I would definitely visit. But I'd make sure I had a towel with me, just in case.


In case humans are Ravenous Bugblatter Beasts?


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## aThenian (Nov 22, 2017)

Harpo said:


> In case humans are Ravenous Bugblatter Beasts?



But we know Earth is "harmless"...well, "mostly harmless". So absolutely no reason not to visit


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## Harpo (Nov 22, 2017)

Some of us are ravenous, some of us are blatters of bugs, some of us are indeed beasts. Some of us are more than one of these things.


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## Mouse (Nov 23, 2017)

Nope. Heard the place is crawling with humans and I can't stand those things.


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## HanaBi (Nov 23, 2017)

"On Earth no one can hear you scream!"


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## BAYLOR (Nov 23, 2017)

The Aliens after seeing our reality television shows, observing out politics and pop culture . Would conclude that there is no evidence of intelligent life on Earth.


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## HanaBi (Nov 23, 2017)

Quite frankly most of humanity would be too busy checking out their phones to notice an alien presence hovering over their heads. Probably wouldn't even believe it still until it appeared on Fb or Twitter.


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## Cathbad (Nov 23, 2017)

HanaBi said:


> Quite frankly most of humanity would be too busy checking out their phones to notice an alien presence hovering over their heads. Probably wouldn't even believe it still until it appeared on Fb or Twitter.



If our President says aliens aren't real, they're not real - don't believe your own eyes!!


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## Harpo (Nov 23, 2017)

We're not real


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## Cathbad (Nov 23, 2017)

Harpo said:


> We're not real



I _knew_ it!!


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## DragonAether (Nov 23, 2017)

Aliens are non real because we live in a flat earth, there is no space, just a dome.


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## Cathbad (Nov 23, 2017)

But the dome is melting!!


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## Harpo (Nov 23, 2017)




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## DragonAether (Nov 23, 2017)

We will burn under the melting glass!!


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## HanaBi (Nov 23, 2017)

if in doubt ...


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## BAYLOR (Nov 23, 2017)

Cathbad said:


> If our President says aliens aren't real, they're not real - don't believe your own eyes!!



Cathbad you do realize that Hollywood is completely controlled by space aliens. That’s why it’s the bizarre and otherworldly place that it is.


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## DelActivisto (Nov 24, 2017)

DragonAether said:


> Pretend to be an alien of your choice. You can go to Earth within a blink, would you visit Earth or would you be aware of those humans and avoid Earth like you would avoid a bear in the forest? (or you would just nuke the planet)
> In case you choose to land, what would you do? You know, kidnapping people, brainwash, control governments or other things.
> 
> Personally I would just nuke the planet.



Umm there has to be something out there more interesting. There has to be.


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## DelActivisto (Nov 24, 2017)

DragonAether said:


> Gods of Nibiru, sentient beings creators of mankind, I please you as one of the few believers of the Nibiru Precursors order.
> I'm here to speak at you as one of your child, that believes only in the truth.
> We, humans, your product, your sons, we failed, we didn't respected your willing, we are ready to be punished for our sins.
> 
> But I pray you to save those few people that seek the truth in your superior mind.



Everyone knows the human race actually came from little green men who used the pyramids as landing pads. Duh.


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## Cathbad (Nov 24, 2017)

You know, the truth is, we don't get much intergalactic tourism because we haven't got a proper name for our planet!

I mean, "earth" is just another way of saying "planet"!  Can you imagine the brochures?  "Come to the planet Planet!"

So, if we want more extraterrestrial visitation, I strongly suggest we get ourselves a proper name!!


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## Harpo (Nov 24, 2017)

Aliens would call it something like "Sol III"


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## Dave (Nov 24, 2017)

Probably, "Sol 3a" given that the Moon is so large and would be "3b."

And that strap-line should be "Come to planet Dirt!" The others would be, "We have the best Earth!" and "Grow your own! Only on planet Dirt!"


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## DragonAether (Nov 24, 2017)

Cathbad said:


> You know, the truth is, we don't get much intergalactic tourism because we haven't got a proper name for our planet!
> 
> I mean, "earth" is just another way of saying "planet"!  Can you imagine the brochures?  "Come to the planet Planet!"
> 
> So, if we want more extraterrestrial visitation, I strongly suggest we get ourselves a proper name!!



What about calling it, Manrania


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## Cathbad (Nov 24, 2017)

DragonAether said:


> What about calling it, Manrania



Actually, I know how we can get a billionaires support for naming our planet!

We'll call it Trumpland!


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## HanaBi (Nov 24, 2017)

How about Planet Gaia? (Asimov would approve)


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## Harpo (Nov 24, 2017)

Visiting aliens would only call it Earth if they'd been listening to our old broadcasts, or possibly the Voyager golden record. Either way, they'd want to hear more Chuck Berry


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## DelActivisto (Nov 24, 2017)

If they listened to anything by Eiffel 65, especially I'm Blue, they'd probably vaporize the planet.


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## DragonAether (Nov 24, 2017)

DelActivisto said:


> If they listened to anything by Eiffel 65, especially I'm Blue, they'd probably vaporize the planet.


Are you insulting the best song ever created on Earth?


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## Dave (Nov 24, 2017)

Why not come visit Earth?

About 71 percent of the Earth's surface is water-covered.

Earth offers water-sports for everyone from age egg+, including kayaking taster sessions and beginners’ courses.

What better place to cool off than in a white water rapid? Earth offers white water kayaking for those that have some kayaking experience in a previous larval stage. 

Earth also offers placid open canoe journeys – a great way to get a different perspective on this local planet, and try your hand at a new water-sport whilst you’re taking in the scenery.

Or try sailing the high seas. Earth's oceans hold about 96.5 percent of all Earth's water. Whether you Jet Ski or attempt at Mast Walk or Keel Walk, Earth has everything for the adventure seeking visitor to the Sol System.


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## DragonAether (Nov 24, 2017)

What does Earth offers for aliens with domination or killing hobbies?


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## Dave (Nov 24, 2017)

I don't know about that, we do okay ourselves. 

Here is something that I copied years ago. I don't know who the author is as it wasn't given. 2008 Virgin Galactic Flights were a bit premature.



> *How to Leave the Planet*
> 
> You can now save your air miles earned on Virgin Atlantic Airways flights to redeem them for Virgin Galactic flights. You will need to wait until 2008.
> 
> ...


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## Lumens (Nov 25, 2017)

Coming from a nearby star, I hardly qualify as an alien, but - of course I would visit Earth! More than happy to meet humans too, all sorts of them. They aren't as bad as you may think. It's just as a whole they are a bit unfocused and not very unified. That's OK though, because as individuals they more than make up for it.


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## DragonAether (Nov 25, 2017)

Lumens said:


> Coming from a nearby star, I hardly qualify as an alien, but - of course I would visit Earth! More than happy to meet humans too, all sorts of them. They aren't as bad as you may think. It's just as a whole they are a bit unfocused and not very unified. That's OK though, because as individuals they more than make up for it.


You know that we will tear you apart, vivisect you and other bad things. Right?


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## Cathbad (Nov 25, 2017)

DragonAether said:


> You know that we will tear you apart, vivisect you and other bad things. Right?



How rude!

Come visit me... I promise to only cut you up into strips, perfect for the bbq!


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## Lumens (Nov 25, 2017)

Heheheheheh, oh, stop tickling me!


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## DelActivisto (Nov 25, 2017)

DragonAether said:


> Are you insulting the best song ever created on Earth?



*listens to it 10 times in a row* Yes! I can't figure out why I like it - I've clearly been given alien mind control drugs.


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