# So... if Tolkien characters were cakes...



## GrownUp (Feb 22, 2005)

Then Sauron would, obviously, be Devil's Food Cake, and Gandalf some sort of Coconut 
Dream.


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## Tsujigiri (Feb 23, 2005)

If Tolkein characters were cakes....dude....the shrooms are warping your mind 

But...on that note...Who do we think would be the cookies baked with weed?

????

Tom Bombadil??


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## dwndrgn (Feb 23, 2005)

Y'all are silly!  However, I'd probably have to say that Galadriel would be Angel Food Cake and Bilbo a Short Cake.  Now you've made me silly


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## GrownUp (Feb 23, 2005)

No wait, I've changed my mind. Sauron would be a large cherry pie with half a peach in the middle.

Now Tsujigiri, no. No one bakes cookies with weed. It burns the weed and makes the cookies stringy.
Now a nice moist zuccini cake with added weed...
                                                        would surely be Galdalf the Grey


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## shaggydog (Feb 23, 2005)

now grownup, you can bake cookies with weed. actually, it's pretty good. I have a recipe book in barcelona, very educative, that shows lots of different ways to cook weed . My sister likes to try different things, and she does cookies quite well! But my favourites are the big cakes hahaha plenty of that around.

gollum could be the apple/banana cake... my precioussss


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## GrownUp (Feb 23, 2005)

Very well Shaggydog, I bow to your superior knowledge.

I'd always thought of Gollum as a banana-walnut loaf. Alright, well, I hadn't. I just thought of it know. But then, I've never tried an apple/banana cake. I can see what you mean, though. The apple part would be Smeagol. Very logical.

See how logical the dicussion is now, everyone? Not silly. Not silly at all.


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## lester (Feb 27, 2005)

i like pecan pie
if i was a cake, thats the one i would be


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## Teresa Edgerton (Feb 27, 2005)

Oh, you people, this is a very silly discussion indeed!

_Obviously_ Gandalf, as an incarnated Maiar spirit, would be the angel cake.  Galadriel would be a wedding cake:  tall, beautiful, and covered in white icing.

And if we weren't limited to baked goods, Strider would be Trail Mix.


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## Tsujigiri (Feb 27, 2005)

And if GrownUp were in LOTR....he'd be a fruitcake


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## Neon (Feb 28, 2005)

Tsujigiri said:
			
		

> And if GrownUp were in LOTR....he'd be a fruitcake


 
LoL Tsuji.

I'm making all the hobbits cupcakes cuz they're so small.


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## dwndrgn (Feb 28, 2005)

Kelpie said:
			
		

> And if we weren't limited to baked goods, Strider would be Trail Mix.


Hah!  Good one!  

Merry would have to be a birthday cake - always ready for a party!


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## Teresa Edgerton (Feb 28, 2005)

I'm tempted to say that Pippin should be Gooseberry Fool, but I know that's not a cake (even if it is a dessert).  I will restrain myself and suggest Trifle instead (which at least includes cake among its ingredients).


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## GrownUp (Feb 28, 2005)

Boromir? Black Forest Gateaux?


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## Mark Robson (Mar 3, 2005)

Gimli, I suppose, would be shortcake.  But I kind of imagine that Denethor would be a custard slice - with a big wide yellow streak in the middle.


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## dwndrgn (Mar 3, 2005)

No, the Ents would have to be Black Forest...

Orcs...Devil's Food

Wormtongue...mud pie with gummi worms in


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## mzarynn (Mar 18, 2005)

I like her character, but Eowyn would have to be Cheesecake.  She gets herself all worked up over a guy who's already spoken for, and doesn't snap out of it until she finds herself _another _guy.  *sigh*


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## Rane Longfox (Mar 19, 2005)

Sauron would, of course, be a doughnut.


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## GrownUp (Mar 27, 2005)

caladanbrood said:
			
		

> Sauron would, of course, be a doughnut.



The Ring itself would have to be the doughnut.


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## GrownUp (Mar 27, 2005)

SUMMARY...

The story, in cake, so far...

Sauron - A large cherry pie with half a peach in the middle (GrownUp)
Tom Bombadil- Cookies baked with weed  (Tsujigiri)
Bilbo - Short Cake 		(Dwndrgn)
Galdalf the Grey - Zuccini cake with added weed (GrownUp)
Gandalf the White - Angel cake ("as an incarnated Maiar spirit" - Kelpie)
Galadriel - A wedding cake ("tall, beautiful, and covered in white icing" - Kelpie)
Strider- Trail Mix ("if we weren't limited to baked goods" - Kelpie)
Merry - A birthday cake ("always ready for a party!" - Dwndrgn)
Denethor - A custard slice ("with a big wide yellow streak in the middle" - Mark Urpen)
Pippin - Gooseberry Fool/Trifle  	(Kelpie)
Ents - Black Forest Gateaux 	(Dwndrgn)
Orcs - Devil's Food Cake 	(Dwndrgn)
Wormtongue - Mud pie with gummi worms in   (Dwndrgn)
Eowyn - Cheesecake (Mzarynn)
The Ring - A doughnut (Caladanbrood/GrownUp)


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## LancerSr (Mar 29, 2005)

Well, let us not forget ol' Sam Gamgee, who would have to be a crab cake - all crusty on the outside surrounding pure goodness inside... or a twinkie for almost the same reasons...

And I guess Saruman (spelling?) would be a plate with five ladyfingers...get it?


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## Winters_Sorrow (Mar 29, 2005)

what about Orlando Batten-berg? 

but as it seems to be the actual characters & not the actors then;

Legolas = fairy cake (enuff said)
Gimli = rock cake (not sure if anyone outside Scotland has had this - basically a small coconut cake with an incredibly hard shell)
Denethor = maderia cake ('cos he's bananas of course! Geddit?)


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## GrownUp (Mar 29, 2005)

LancerSr said:
			
		

> Well, let us not forget ol' Sam Gamgee, who would have to be a crab cake - all crusty on the outside surrounding pure goodness inside...



Ooooh. A savoury cake. Risque.


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## GrownUp (Nov 2, 2005)

HONESTLY. I stop paying attention for 5 minutes and everyone forgets about cakes.


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## Carnifexticles (Nov 2, 2005)

to even consider discussing such serious matters without including a savoury alternative is crazy! personally i think of them more as party food in general, an assortment of snacky treats for us to devour. eg gimli is most definitely the scotch egg of middle earth, for obvious reasons, whilst samwoise has got to be a wagon wheel because of his rotund shape with its sturdy veneer juxtaposed with the gooey soft middle


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## GrownUp (Nov 2, 2005)

Lovely ideas but I can't help but feel that the definition of "cake" is being stretched a little.


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## FelineEyes (Nov 5, 2005)

Gollum would have to be something like a dump cake...all mixed up in the same pan and sometimes you get pineapple tidbits and cherries and other times you just get plain burned floury cake mix.


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## Teir (Nov 6, 2005)

If they were cakes?........
..........
..........um right, thats cool, you guys have fun....

*teir backs up slowly towards door*


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## Jason_Taverner (Nov 7, 2005)

Winters_Sorrow said:
			
		

> Gimli = rock cake (not sure if anyone outside Scotland has had this - basically a small coconut cake with an incredibly hard shell)


 
werid thats what I thought he would be or a battered mars bar true not a cake but you know... and thanks for this thread GrownUp its the best on the forum


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## moviefan (Nov 7, 2005)

A big chocolate cake would be middle earth !! yum with the ring on top .


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## Treikayan (Nov 8, 2005)

Gollum - Fish Cake or Crab Cakes (well, it is fish preciousss.  He didn't know what taters were)
Saruman - Carrot, Raisin Cake (Raisins are rich in iron and so was Saruman)
Beorn - Bee Keeper's Honey Spice Cake (He kept bees, so it suits).


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## Anfeidrol (Nov 8, 2005)

......hmmm....you guys have just brought a new meaning to random lmao ;P 

*tries to pinch the ring and eat it*


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## GrownUp (Mar 29, 2006)

I'm reviving this thread. Not enough cake discussion about.


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## Marky Lazer (Mar 29, 2006)

Any cookie with a bite out of it would be Frodo of the Nine Fingers


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## Teir (Mar 30, 2006)

GrownUp said:
			
		

> I'm reviving this thread. Not enough cake discussion about.


 
Oh dear lord 
Shouldnt have mentioned it


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## Thunderchild (Mar 30, 2006)

Hmmm...

Denethor would be a Fruit Cake

and Gimli a Mud Cake - just impossible to finish off


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## Remillard (Mar 30, 2006)

Oh.. it's gotta be Yoda anyday..  The only thing i've seen Gandalf do is make the end his staff glow.  You know the staff I mean, it's got a knob on the end.

And he's a wizard.. 

<wonders how many people don't know that song>


Anway.. Gandalf.. good at making fireworks.. Yoda..real dangerous with tubes of light, a total wiz jumping around and just too darned small to hit.

Oh.. sure... Gandalf can see off a big red winged demon while plummeting towards certain death, but he just got lucky that One time.  The demon was having a bad hair day anyway.


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## Jason_Taverner (Mar 31, 2006)

not one mention of cake obvious mistake there but it made me laugh so thanks and for the record gandalf would win


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## hypocriticHarkonnen (Apr 2, 2006)

Arwen....tiramisu? (not sure if tiramisu is a cake, though)


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## GrownUp (Apr 5, 2006)

Because of the coffee or because of the sponge?


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## hypocriticHarkonnen (Apr 5, 2006)

both. gentle and delicate like sponge, but strong, like coffee, in resolve. haha, someone hit me on the head with a rock....


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## GrownUp (Apr 6, 2006)

No rock hitting. I'm getting into this now.
I suppose the mascarpone would represent her creamy pallor.


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## Paige Turner (Apr 6, 2006)

That horrible, dry Almond-Apple Cake Thing my sister-in-law made?

100% Shagrat


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## GrownUp (Apr 10, 2006)

*Update*

Saruman - Five ladyfingers on a plate (LancerSr)
Legolas - Fairy cake (Winters Sorrow)
Gimli - Scotch egg (Carnifexticles)
Gollum - Fish Cake (Treikayan)
Beorn - Bee Keeper's Honey Spice Cake (Treikayan)
Samwise Gamgee - Wagonwheel ("because of his rotund shape with its sturdy veneer juxtaposed with the gooey soft middle" - Carnifexticles)
Frodo of the Nine Fingers  - A cookie with a bite out of it (Marky Lazer)
Arwen - Tiramisu ("gentle and delicate like sponge, but strong, like coffee, in resolve" - hypocriticHarkonnen)
Shagrat - Horrible, dry Almond-Apple Cake Thing (" ...my sister-in-law made" - Paige Turner)
Middle Earth -  A big chocolate cake ("yum" - moviefan)

_Heh heh heh_



			
				GrownUp said:
			
		

> SUMMARY...
> 
> The story, in cake, so far...
> 
> ...


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## Jason_Taverner (Apr 10, 2006)

I so hungry now


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## cornelius (Apr 10, 2006)

is this thread also about " the hobbit"? started reading it in english this time


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## GrownUp (Apr 11, 2006)

People have been taking wild liberties with foodstuffs. It's just that sort of sidestepping, barely-connected thread.


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## An8el (Apr 20, 2006)

We can't forget Shelob - the almost smart enough giant spider. 
Shelob could be a baked Alaska. Once you get through the crust, all oozy in the middle.


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## hypocriticHarkonnen (Apr 27, 2006)

eww. hehe. i second that XD


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## CarlottaVonUberwald (May 1, 2006)

This thread made me hungry...... although can bad guys be something as sweet as cakes


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## alicebandassassin (May 1, 2006)

whos to say they might all have gooey centers


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## chrispenycate (May 2, 2006)

I suspect Smaug of being a carrot cake; a very big carrot cake, of course.
And I've actually seen the cakes for the ringwraiths, at the back of a shelf in a supermarket, vastly past their sell by dates and preserved in plastic, evil almost visibly oozing out of them. But perhaps those were barrow wight cakes.


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## Paige Turner (May 2, 2006)

Actually, I could go for a big mug of tea and a couple Goldberries right now. Mmm.


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## weaveworld (May 2, 2006)

Aragorn...Fudge Cake


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## chrispenycate (May 2, 2006)

Relative to more recent perpetrators of the genre, Tolkien has a noticeable shortage of tarts.


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## alicebandassassin (May 2, 2006)

yes far more like muffins than tarts


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## iratebeaver (May 27, 2006)

legolas- if you go by who plays him in the movies a fruit cake definately, but if you go by the book he would be a pound cake because he was beastly.


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## tiny99 (May 29, 2006)

sauron is a battenberg


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## GrownUp (Mar 14, 2007)

iratebeaver said:


> legolas- if you go by who plays him in the movies a fruit cake



Not a cheesecake?


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## Talysia (Mar 16, 2007)

Reading through some of these entries...  I'm a bit surprised.  Tolkien characters as cakes?


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## isacked (Mar 17, 2007)

When I saw the thread, I straight away thought of the hobbits as sponge cakes (you know they sponge on everybody and keep eating). But short cakes are betteer!!

I think sauron should be some kind of sponge cake also. Or a doughnut. You know they have an eye in the middle...


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