# Kingdom of Heaven (2005)



## Traveller (Jan 27, 2005)

To be released May 2005 about the Crusades seen the previews and the trailer it looks like it could be good and its directed by Ridley Scott  who I say did a pretty fine job with Gladiator.

Starring Liam Neeson, Jeremy Irons and Orlando Bloom


http://www.kingdomofheavenmovie.com/


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## Brian G Turner (Jan 28, 2005)

Yay! A film about the crusades!

 Aw shigite - it's got Orlando Bloom in it!!


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## The Master™ (Jan 28, 2005)

And is there any information about which part of the Crusades??? And I'm surprised the Islamic community hasn't risen up against this being made... Since the Moors were fairly badly treated!!!

Is it The Brits or The Knights Templar or someone else that is being portrayed???


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## Traveller (Jan 28, 2005)

About the Knights Templar 

There is going to be a bit of romance in it by the looks of the write ups



> Set in the 12th century, the film focuses on a young blacksmith who becomes a knight and helps defend Jerusalem against the Crusaders. There is also a love story, as the young knight falls in love with a princess.


Yes Orlando is in it but in the pics ive seen he looks very different


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## LadyFel (Jan 28, 2005)

Traveller said:
			
		

> Set in the 12th century, the film focuses on a young blacksmith who becomes a knight and helps defend Jerusalem against the Crusaders. There is also a love story, as the young knight falls in love with a princess.


As opposed to the young blacksmith who falls in love with the governor's daughter and becomes a pirate in order to save her... 

A cup of typecasting, anyone?


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## Brian G Turner (Jan 28, 2005)

Test: Stand rigid and stiff, lower your voice to a patronising resonance, then speak like you're reading lines aloud. 

   There you go - Orlando Bloom. 

 Will probably spoil this one with his appalling reciting-of-lines-with-patronising-resonance, but I'm very glad to hear that he's standing against the Crusaders.

 There were some great moments with the crusades - Saladin is a great character from (I think the third) crusades. But I figure we should be very careful not to expect any real history in this one, other than a bunch of guys invade the Middle East, and there are Arabs there - historical references _fin_.

   My crikey - I sound very dour for that.


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## Circus Cranium (Jan 28, 2005)

Ridley Scott----cool, this sounds really interesting. 


(Aw shigite - it's got Orlando Bloom in it!!)
Yeah. He's gross. We HATE looking at him. Honest. Really. yuck.


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## The Master™ (Jan 28, 2005)

Orlando Bloom, playing someone who falls in love with someone he shouldn't, but gets away with it... Oooo, sounds like LotR (I'm sure Legolas and Gimli were upto something), and Pirates of the Caribbean AND TROY!!! Jeez... Change the record, guys!!!

One knight will save Jeruselem from the Knights Templar??? BWAHAHAHA!!! Yeah, right... Carrying an Uzi 9mm???

Think they might throw in Richard The Lionheart for a bit of historical messing about???


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## Brian G Turner (Jan 29, 2005)

Circus Cranium said:
			
		

> Yeah. He's gross. We HATE looking at him. Honest. Really. yuck.


 He's fine to look at - but wouldn't it be adorable if he played a mute in his next big role? 

 I don't think he'll be expected to save Jerusalem any more than he could save Troy. I doubt Scott could trash history _that_ much. What would be great if he actually gives credit at the end to what actually happens to the crusaders _after_ they take the city.


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## The Master™ (Jan 29, 2005)

I said:
			
		

> He's fine to look at - but wouldn't it be adorable if he played a mute in his next big role?


I vote for dismembered or rotting corpse as his next role... 



			
				I said:
			
		

> I don't think he'll be expected to save Jerusalem any more than he could save Troy. I doubt Scott could trash history _that_ much. What would be great if he actually gives credit at the end to what actually happens to the crusaders _after_ they take the city.


You are expecting CREDIT in hollywood??? You actually expect them to show the truth and not some weird chimera of the truth??? They will take whatever will attract the lowest common denominator!!! Everything will be perfect, the Knights Templar will not rob Jeruselem of it wealth and hide it away somewhere in central Europe... Or kill indescriminately!!!


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## Brian G Turner (Jan 29, 2005)

Actually, got some more details up here:
Kingdom of Heaven


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## rune (Jan 31, 2005)

It must be a girl thing when it comes to Bloom, coz personally I think he's lovely


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## The Master™ (Jan 31, 2005)

Must be... 

Now, Kiera Knightley... *DROOL*


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## erickad71 (Jan 31, 2005)

rune said:
			
		

> It must be a girl thing when it comes to Bloom, coz personally I think he's lovely


Am I still a girl then, cause he doesn't do a whole lot for me. I can certainly name a few other male actors that do though.


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## The Master™ (Feb 1, 2005)

Better be careful, if you start naming them, you'll start drooling AGAIN, then pass out from dehydration...  *coughbradpittcoughjonbonjovicough*

You can jump in there to help Brad through this bad time...


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## Leto (Feb 1, 2005)

rune said:
			
		

> It must be a girl thing when it comes to Bloom, coz personally I think he's lovely


Same as Ericka, not too bad but not the best. In LOTR Viggo Mortensen was far more attractive (and the one playing Faramir too), and in Pirates of Carribean, well there's Johnny Depp (a bit too skinny but lovely).

For the records, I'm the one female who thinks Brad Pitt is everything but attractive.


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## The Master™ (Feb 1, 2005)

Quick Leto, DUCK!!!  ehehe

What about Joaquim Phoenix???  My wife gets a far-away look in her eyes when she's watching him... Personally, I think she chose the wrong brother... Should have chosen River...


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## Leto (Feb 1, 2005)

I'm on your wife side. At least this one is alive, and full of manhood. The other one was gorgeous but looked like a pre-reaphaelite angel.


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## The Master™ (Feb 1, 2005)

You have a "thing" for Joaquim??? Bet you enjoyed his portrayal of Commidus in Gladiator, didn't you???


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## Leto (Feb 1, 2005)

Except for the historical mistakes you mean ? 
No, he was just a pleasant sight as Russel Crowe and both played very well. I don't thing I had a thing for a actor since I was 14 or so... Then I discovered real boys (then men) were much better than celluloids ones.


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## polymorphikos (Feb 1, 2005)

"Rome will be a republic"

This film seems to conform to the implications of what is one of the funniest lines in cinematic history.


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## rune (Feb 1, 2005)

I get a that dreamy look for a few actors actually    But bless Bloom's cotton socks, he's got a lovely face and nice manners


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## The Master™ (Feb 1, 2005)

Have you got time to be watching movies, rune??? You got books to read and recommend, girl!!!


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## Brian G Turner (Feb 1, 2005)

Joaquim is a Phoenix?! Well, I never realised he was one of the brothers. 

 Whatever happened to Leaf, anyway??


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## rune (Feb 2, 2005)

The Master™ said:
			
		

> Have you got time to be watching movies, rune??? You got books to read and recommend, girl!!!


I have to be very organised and manage to squeeze in the odd movie    I sometimes resent working, eating and sleeping because of the other things I want to do.  
I've got to find time to study too  , why isnt there 48 hour days


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## The Master™ (Feb 2, 2005)

rune said:
			
		

> I have to be very organised and manage to squeeze in the odd movie  I sometimes resent working, eating and sleeping because of the other things I want to do.
> I've got to find time to study too  , why isnt there 48 hour days


 
Terrible when your pasttimes are so time consuming and you have to try and fit them all in in one day!!!  

You need synchronized clones... One to do each fun thing, and then download the experience into the original!!


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## erickad71 (Feb 3, 2005)

Leto said:
			
		

> For the records, I'm the one female who thinks Brad Pitt is everything but attractive.


 
Blasphemy!!! ...hehehe...everyone is intitled to their own opinion of course.


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## Alysheba (Feb 6, 2005)

This actually looks rather good. Granted, I like Bloom, but I must say, his role as Paris in Troy was not my favorite performance. In fact I found the character rather dull and cowardly.


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## The Master™ (Feb 6, 2005)

Of course, hollywood seems to find a lovely way of missing out some of the important parts of myth/legend or even fact from their movies...


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## Culhwch (Feb 7, 2005)

I said:
			
		

> Joaquim is a Phoenix?! Well, I never realised he was one of the brothers.
> 
> Whatever happened to Leaf, anyway??


 
I think Joaquin is Leaf - just changed his name. To be more mainstream, I guess.

Kingdom of Heaven does look cool, though - going beyond young Master Bloom, a top-notch cast - Liam Neeson, Jeremy Irons, David Thewlis, Brendan Gleeson etc. And Ridley Scott knows a thing or two about film-making. Should be brilliant, or, at the very least, better than the appallingly dire Troy.


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## Silk (Feb 7, 2005)

Culhwch said:
			
		

> I think Joaquin is Leaf - just changed his name. To be more mainstream, I guess.


 
That explaines a lot!  I read the River Phoenix biography a few years back and i could have sworn he didn't have a brother called Joaquin.

Mystery solved


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## Brian G Turner (Feb 7, 2005)

Thanks for the heads up on Leaf > Joaquim. 

Great - thread now back on track.


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## Winters_Sorrow (Feb 7, 2005)

well, and I HATE to admit this, I'm looking forward to this movie *ducks!*

Troy and Alexander both made me want to march round Oliver Stone's & Wolfgang Peterson and shove Helm's Deep & Braveheart down their throats!! (see films DO cause violence )

At least Ridley Scott has made some good movies - not a great Gladiator fan but at least it's watchable.

Anyhoo - any movies which involves swords & armour have got my vote! (I even liked Ivanhoe! )

p.s. I already mentioned this but Alexander really, *really* sucked!!


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## Alexa (Feb 8, 2005)

Some scenes from the trailer remind me a lot of Gladiator. I'll go to the cimema, just to be sure it's worth watching it. I loved Gladiator, so I hope Kingdom of Heaven won't disappoint me as Troy and Alexander.


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## The Master™ (Feb 8, 2005)

I'll lay money on the table, and say that there will be a scene in the movie where a principal character move up and down along a line of massed warriors...

Just like: Mummy Returns, RotK (x2) and King Arthur... No doubt it happened in Alexander, and may even have happened in Troy (but I can't quite remember)


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## Leto (Feb 8, 2005)

it happened in Alexander, several times


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## The Master™ (Feb 8, 2005)

Seems to be the latest way of wasting time and extoling the virtues to the massed hordes of warriors...  BORING!!!


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## Winters_Sorrow (Feb 8, 2005)

To me it would be a lovely way of saying, see that bloke on the horse riding up & down? He's the one you kill first...got it? 

And all the guys standing slightly in front with the little plumes on their helmets? They get it second!


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## Leto (Feb 8, 2005)

No, Alexander's helmet was the worst of all.

BTW, I want to see Orlando Broom in a prehistorical epic next time.


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## The Master™ (Feb 8, 2005)

Being a T-Rex's appetiser???

Cavemen should be burly and not skinny little things...


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## Lacedaemonian (Feb 8, 2005)

Ridley Scott usually makes good movies, and from all accounts he made an accurate portrayal of Black Hawk Down.  What's more he is a geordie, and so is naturally too cool for shoes.  This film sounds great.


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## Lacedaemonian (Feb 8, 2005)

David Thewlis is also a high quality actor, and did a sterling job as Lupus in Harry Potter.  Take Orlando Bloom out of the cast and it would be perfect.  The producers clearly wanted him in the movie to draw thick little girls who otherwise would have no interest in the crusades.


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## Leto (Feb 8, 2005)

The Master™ said:
			
		

> Being a T-Rex's appetiser???
> 
> Cavemen should be burly and not skinny little things...



You can have a mix of both... To satisfy all tastes.  But no Brad Pitt nor Adam Sandler (sp?)

Lace, I didn't find Lupus well cast in last Harry Potter. Maybe David Thewlis is a good actor, but he wasn't lupine enough for me. Strangely as I usually like most of the cast choices of the film (especially Alan Rickman - wonderful actor)


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## The Master™ (Feb 8, 2005)

Why no Brad Pitt??? He attracts a certain _type_ of woman... *Points and stares at Ericka* 

David Thewlis has played some strange parts over the years, and as a Yorkshireman, he is of course too cool to hang around with shoeless geordies!!!


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## Lacedaemonian (Feb 8, 2005)

Alexander actually did do that though.


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## The Master™ (Feb 8, 2005)

What??? Hang around with shoeless geordies??? Weird!!!


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## Winters_Sorrow (Feb 8, 2005)

The Master™ said:
			
		

> David Thewlis has played some strange parts over the years


 
yeah, what the hell was up with his accent in Dragonheart?

nearly as bad as Tony Curtis (the lies the castle of my fadda )


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## erickad71 (Feb 8, 2005)

Well, I agree with Leto about Alan Rickman anyway.


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## Culhwch (Feb 11, 2005)

But what's an epic without the big stir-the-troops-into-a-frenzy speech? What are they gonna say- 'Well, fellas, most of you are probably going to die. Very painfully, no doubt.  Now excuse me while I go and watch from that nice protected hill over there.'?


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## Winters_Sorrow (Feb 11, 2005)

just get them roaring drunk as say the other army fancies their sister

worked for the celts!


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## The Master™ (Feb 11, 2005)

I forgot the rabble rousing speech in Braveheart...

Although to be fair, there wasn't the speech in the Mummy Returns... All the Majai lined up, knew their duty and were gonna fight to the last man to defend humanity against the army of Anubis!!! Worked much better!! IMNSHO!!!


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## rune (May 15, 2005)

Anyone actually got to see this yet?  I did, had good points and not so good points.  Personally it was OK, I think I'll need to watch it again to understand what's going on though (lots put into the movie, too much really)


Not sure about the scruffy look for all the guys  I much prefer a clean shaved face.


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## Eradius Lore (May 15, 2005)

Looks a good film. I always had an interest in the knights templar and stuff like that around those periods


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## Brian G Turner (Jan 9, 2007)

*Kingdon of Heaven*

Oh, lordy - had the misfortune to watch this one last week.


*****SPOILERS******
(Not that there's any real plot anyway...)







The opening sets up a pretty confused set of moralities - Orlando Bloom murders a priest, then Liam Neeson murders the law authorities when they come by.

It's also at this point we see the Viking and Saracen in his party - could have been great characters for the film - but instead are simply killed off, leaving just the Anglos.

And then after - Orlando Bloom will shag the Princess of Jerusalem, but refuses to marry her, knowing that she'll be gifted to the "villain" of the piece - who himself does little but wander around sneering.

Also - when Saladdin makes the first attack, Orlando decides to set his men to fight, in order to "protect" the civilians outside of the walls. Since when does Saladdin ever give the impression that this is normal for him to murder pilgrims and Arabs?

We see great-looking actors in the film - all of which wander on, then wander off without really doing anything. Jeremy Irons is utterly wasted, as is the rest of the support cast.

Later the crusaders - having lived in the Middle East for decades - go out to fight Saladdin. Orlando Bloom suddenly becomes the only person of European descent to realise you need to be near water courses to keep the army at strenght? Come on...

And then - the great finale - the glorious surrender of Jerusalem!!!!

Saladdin approaches, and suddenly Orlando thinks he's going to massacre the population of Jerusalem? Say, what? So he organises the city defences, Ridley Scott gives us fireworks, then Orlando Bloom rides out, finds Saladdin is fine to allow civilians to leave - so Orlando surrenders the city. Say, what? Where's the heroic accomplishment in that??!

What a crock this film was - lovely sets and scenery, but the scripting seems improvised on the spot, probably by an adolescent who didn;t really have any idea about what he was writing about.

This film is a waste of everything from start to finish - no story, no character, and just a plain insult to viewers.

You would have thought Ridley Scott and co could have done better than this, but all it looks like is that people took the cash, then whipped out something quick after a bored afternoon of planning.

Too harsh?


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## chump (Jan 9, 2007)

*Re: Kingdon of Heaven*

I see what you are saying I was pretty disapointed when I saw this film as well.  However I have heard that the director's cut is much better as they cut many key scenes out of the orignal.


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## mosaix (Jan 10, 2007)

*Re: Kingdon of Heaven*

"Jeremy Irons is utterly wasted, as is the rest of the support cast."

What? They were drunk all the time?


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## Winters_Sorrow (Jan 10, 2007)

*Re: Kingdon of Heaven*

The ride out of the crusaders to their massacre and the surrender of Jerusalem were historical events so I guess he couldn't help himself. The crusaders didn't realise the strength of Saladin's forces or how close they were otherwise they probably wouldn't have left their fortifications but it was a stupid move and showed their disdain for their enemy.

It was a completely pointless movie however, populated with unlikeable characters and tacked on unnecessary elements like the Orlando Bloom love interest.
For me the script was poor, the acting terrible and the action sequences seemed to be there as trailer fodder to attract unlucky punters.
El Cid is 10 times the movie of this drek.


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## roddglenn (Jan 10, 2007)

*Re: Kingdon of Heaven*

Hallo, WS, how's life treating ya?

Well, I actually liked the film.  I'm a big fan of Ridley Scott anyway, but I didn't see half the problems with it that others seemed to.  RS did try to stick to historical fact as much as possible, so he did have those restrictions.  

The Christian army moving away from water to attack Saladin is fact - they believed that because they were an army of God that they were unbeatable.

Also, the Christians had murdered every man, woman and child when they took Jerusalem, so Baleon was understandably worried that Saladin might do the same (there were dozens of other nationalities within the city walls, not just arabs), so he fought to gain terms, not to win.  He knew he could not possibly win, so he was fighting for more favourable terms for the people - pretty just, IMHO.


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## Winters_Sorrow (Jan 10, 2007)

*Re: Kingdon of Heaven*

Hi Rod, not bad thanks. Just settling back into the "work routine" after being off during xmas & new year. How's yourself?
I agree that RS did try and maintain some historical focus, for which he should be applauded, it's just that the non-historical sections feel so much worse by comparison. The daft intro, the romance element and basically any scene with Orlando Bloom in, is frankly awful cinema. I have the same complaints about James Cameron's Titanic in many ways.


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## roddglenn (Jan 10, 2007)

*Re: Kingdon of Heaven*

I'm tickety boo, ta.  The second book is out with a publisher at the mo and waiting to hear back from them (fingers crossed).

Ooo yeah, Titanic...yikes.  And I so love Cameron's Aliens.


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## Saolta Oiche (Jan 10, 2007)

*Re: Kingdon of Heaven*

It was not one of the greatest films, could have been done better and you would have thought so seeing as the director was one of the greats.

Saying that it was not tooooo bad, sure a lacking in a little depth and missing a few things but it is watchable.

I suppose the best way to look at it is is to accept it for what it is, not an epic but okay.

As I said I find it watchable but it is not up in my top lot, not by a long shot really. The whole concept may just have been tooooo big for Scott.


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## why me why now (Feb 26, 2007)

*Re: Kingdon of Heaven*



mosaix said:


> "Jeremy Irons is utterly wasted, as is the rest of the support cast."
> 
> What? They were drunk all the time?



i LOLd


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