Character Creation Chain

[Memnoch]

Lagger the Blagger

Following his annoyingly grating appearance on big brother, he and his entourage of gay hangers on, spent every evening trawling the clubs of London milking his 15 minutes.

Following a night of passion with the husband of a famous TV couple, he wrote his Autobiography and it was even more entertaining that Jordans (Not difficult) Sold 6 copies and was recycled for toilet roll.

Gerald Adam Jones

 

[Interference]

Gerald Adam Jones

Internationally famous toilet roll salesman. Also keeps budgies in a sack. Hates blues music but enjoys feeling blue. You gotta admire him. Unlike ...

Crispin Von Doom

 

[Memnoch]

Crispin Von Doom

knowns as the "geek" at school, this scholar of comic books and all things uncool, lost his heart and mind when watching the adaption of the fantastic four to a certain jessica!! "Von Doom" now theres a guy to which a man should aspire, with that he did retire, his tired surname of Dawson.

Unfortunatley this creeped everyone out ,and he promptly took his own life upon seeing Rise of the Silver Surfer, and being unable to control his jealous rage at the love of the stretchy one and his beau . . .

alas poor Crispin you did not even know yourself . . . unlike

Dimmock Dorlean

 

[Interference]

Dimmock Dorlean

Victim of a terrible smear campaign which villified him for "knowing" himself a little too often than was strictly necessary for a healthy lifestyle.

Dimmock's political career was thus shattered and his self confidence took such a savage beating that he only recovered after years of therapy with the world reknowned Dr Headwrecksalvageman, who had a beautiful secretary named ...

Donna Cello

 

[Memnoch]

Donna Cello


a former lap dancer in her student years, she caught the eye of the Dr on a "business" lunch!! Was promptly offered a job following a . . . erm fallacious dance . . .

Giving up her psychology degree for her new six figure annual salary prayed on her mind over the years and the Dr's interest waned after ten years of working together and moved to a work placement young, young lady.

In a fit of jealousy and creeping middle agedom Donna promptly, took photo's of the Dr and his new concubine and informed the Dr's loving and trusting wife. Leading to a divorce and an arrest for underage copulation.

Donna finished her degree and took all the Dr's former clients on. She started a franchise of pschological practices leading to wealth fame and in later years plastic surgery. At 62 her 22 year old fiancee mysteriously found her dead at the bottom of her stairs a week after leaving her entire wealth to him! He was called . . .

Leroy Schlong

 

[Interference]

Leroy Schlong

... and he couldn't count. This was the clue that led to his arrest and trial for wilfull murder, as when, in an identification line-up, 'number five' was asked to 'step forward please', his quivering guilt made him break down and admit the crime.

He was number six.

This was, coincidentally, the number on the menu of a chinese meal ordered by his trial lawyer,

Acroyd "Hopeless" McBeal

 

[Memnoch]

Acroyd "Hopeless" McBeal

Following his the defence of his previous client collapsing so spectacularly, his client was on trial for a first offence of shop lifting and following Acroyd's impassioned plea on his behalf, he got the death sentence without appeal, an unprecedented punishment as it was in England and this had been outlawed many years ago.

On the verge of quitting, Acroyd nearly packed it all in, 42 cases all ending in defeat he was a laughing stock!! But a man never quit he learns and moves on, as his father used to preach.

So with this philosophy in mind he decided under no cicumstance would Leroy be convicted of this obviously mistaken crime. . . a week into the trial it wasn't looking good!! Determined to see his client proved innocent Acroyd did what he felt any good lawyer would do!!!

He held his hands up and confessed to the murder of Madam Cello . . . this cleared Mr Schlong and got him the result he desired victory for his client.

He happily excepted the triple life sentence for murder and was lead to jail with a satisfued smile on his face much to the bemusment of . . .

Judge Archibald Touchnfeel

 

[HardScienceFan]

Acroyd "Hopeless" McBeal
who got his degree in Law from Stoke- on -Trent University,was a master of manipulating juries.
When he was younger he aspired to be an actor,quoting Lionel Blair and Peter Cushing among his favourites.
After his marriage to page 3 girl Belinda Coahblimy broke up,he took to reading the collected works of 'Stephen Fry ,Martin Amis,and John Grisham',a very famous writers' collaboration.
He once defended famous criminal
'Greasy Bob' Tuppens

 

[Interference]

'Greasy Bob' Tuppens

... was a two-bit forger, not generally thought to be the full shilling, who worked as a tanner in a tanning shop. He earned the crown of Underworld King, but had to share it, so it was only a half crown, really. He was, as contemporary copper parlance has it, bent as a nine bob note, but not as bent as the owner of the other half of his criminal crown,

"Long Stretch" Larry, the Lanky Yanky

SORRY, MISSED ONE ... (is this allowed??)

Judge Archibald Touchnfeel

A popular Jazz musician of the 1940s, he, like his noble fellows, Duke Ellington, King Cole and Count Basey, played at many a celebrity gig. Unlike these others, though, he was the only one to be mistakenly identified with his boogie-woogie nickname and discovered that he was being asked to release more criminals than records. He sat his bar exam at Sun Studios in Tennessee with The Colonel.

The Colonel was the former manager of The King (Elvis somebodyorother) and, later, the scoundrel ...

"Long Stretch" Larry, the Lanky Yanky

 

[tangaloomababe]

"Long Stretch" Larry, the Lanky Yank

was infact unbeknown to either of them a half brother to Miss Cumbria, Its seems that Miss Cumbria's father had a rather romantic interlude with and American actress and the result of which was Larry.

Larry's nick name was obvious once you had meet him. He stood almost 2mtrs, but sadly lacked the cordination to play basketball. His mother told him his father had died, in the war however he was about to meet a women who knew the truth about his background and she was prepared to tell for a price.....

Madeline Sherry

 

[Interference]

Madeline Sherry

... is the brand of sherry they all drank at a birthday party held for the enigmatic ...

Marcel Dirk

 

[Culhwch]

Bucking the trend to follow on...

Marcel Dirk knew very little about his early years. An orphan abandoned on the streets of Honesty, he learnt to fight and he learnt to steal at an early age. 'Dirk' was a nikname that stuck, and 'Marcel' was adopted for a con, and he took a shine to it. He lived on his wits and a ruthless streak a mile wide for years until, at the age of thirty-eight, Dirk found religion. How hadn't he found this, the greatest con of all, years earlier?

Thane Ulrik Oenessen [Who has absolutely no relation to Marcel Dirk. At all.]

 

[Interference]

Thane Ulrik Oenessen

... also known as Thane The Trend Bucker, he polishes Odin's glass eye when there's a party on. Thane is a mortal, of course, though he has some godlike powers that allow him to eat unmentionable goo and excrete Uranium. Gods, having no use for Uranium, consider him pretty damned nearly unnecessary.

The Party Thrower (Monsieur Arkwright)

 

[Talysia]

The Party Thrower (Monsieur Arkwright)

Famous throughout the land as a man of great taste, Monsieur Arkwright throws only the best of parties. He can be hired to arrange any form of party, no function too small (as is written on his calling card), and any tastes can be catered for, no matter how odd they may be. Discretion (again, or so it says on his calling card) is guaranteed.

Or at least, it would usually. But then, he had never had a request like this before.

The High Lady Winter

 

[Thessaly]

The High Lady Winter

She knows what they all mutter about her, whenever she appears alongside Lord Winter at a reception or a ball. The "High" Lady Winter, they titter, cruelly mimicking the foreigner's pronunciation, but Lady Winter does not care; she has never cared. She is as much a representative of the English crown to the Florentine Republic as her Lord husband, and the jibes are so far beneath her contempt, they barely hurt her at all. It takes more than a handful of clucking matrons and painted courtesans to break the spirits of Lady Winter. She nods dutifully at the Papal legate whilst Lord Winter speaks to Venice about that matter with the blockade. The other women chatter genially amongst themselves, but the High Lady Winter has no time for such trivialities.

Dagger Tremandis

 

[tangaloomababe]

Dagger Tremandis

Dagger hates his name, hates his parents and pretty much hates the world in general. He is after all a teenager and nobody understands him.

His parents are into alternative names with four children including Dagger called Spirit, Horizon and Fountain. Dagger thinks they are just a bit loopy and has no time for anyone in his life except for....

Sarah Pitman

 

[mirinda]

Sarah Pitman

Is one of those exceptionally beautiful people. She has that air about her that makes people comfortable no matter where they are or what they're doing. She not blind to the fact that people fawn over her, she just chooses to ignore it. She's into more real people like Dagger, despite his name. She also couldn't live without her one true blue confidant,

Jesse Trumain

 

[Interference]

Jesse Trumain

Cheerful about everything, even death, Jesse is generally regarded as someone who says what's on her mind and means what she says. She is blessed with having nothing much in her mind worth saying, anyway, and so is widely loved, admired and respected. Hence her election to the High Tribunal of Binding Marshes, where she has been mentor and advisor to the ruler ...

Mighty Les

 

[Talysia]

Mighty Les

Dubbed "Mighty Les" by the local paper, Les is as far from heroic as they come. Fond of cigarettes, beer and chips, not to mention being rather out of shape, he could almost be a stereotypical slob, but he became a hero when he saved a child from a burning car. Now he is reevaluating his life, and sees this as a chance to change his life.

Joanna Selkirk

 

[Erin99]

Joanna Selkirk is one of the most popular women of her age. When she goes to high-class parties and dines with the rich and famous, she knows she's admired by all. However, few know that, before she changed her name, she was actually called Joe Selkirk. Yes, the popular Miss Selkirk used to be the one and only Mr Selkirk.


Manwel "lynx" Garbetter