Writing Challenge Discussion -- January 2011

[Perpetual Man]

A quick question, i have a story ready to post, I've tried tinkering with it and can't improve it, although i'm sure to ask at the end of the month for suggestions. And I tried other things to get another story but keep coming back to this one. So it's the one i'm posting. However, I don't want to give the story away too easily because you're not supposed to know what you're reading till the last word. I'm not saying people jump straight to the end of stories but you know what it's like when you scan something. Do you think I should make it a light colour then people would have to highlight it to read it at the end?

That's an interesting idea Allanon, something a bit different, I'd have no problem with it. I know when the stories are so short it's sometimes hard not to catch a glimpse of the last word.

 

[Allanon]

Well, it's up! Perp, do I get a biscuit for this one?

 

[HoopyFrood]

Hah, I like that, Allanon! And a good move, hiding the last word (I know sometimes there's something in my brain that's just immediately attracted to the final word or line) and once you read it, completely changes the perspective of the story!

 

[Perpetual Man]

I did not know where it was going, and I think seeing the last word definitely would have ruined it.

Once revealed it made me smirk big time. The only downside it is another one to add to my far too large short list.

Not just worth of a biscuit, have two.

 

[Allanon]

Thank you, it's much appreciated!! didn't know if it'd work but definatley didn't want the end given away.

Glad you like it, I've felt the same about quite a few stories in here this month too. Some really good stuff here!!

 

[mosaix]

A quick question, i have a story ready to post, I've tried tinkering with it and can't improve it, although i'm sure to ask at the end of the month for suggestions. And I tried other things to get another story but keep coming back to this one. So it's the one i'm posting. However, I don't want to give the story away too easily because you're not supposed to know what you're reading till the last word. I'm not saying people jump straight to the end of stories but you know what it's like when you scan something. Do you think I should make it a light colour then people would have to highlight it to read it at the end?

I have exactly the same problem, except with mine it's the last line. I think you just have to trust people to read the story from start to finish and accept it as it is.

 

[GreenKidx]

Very nice Judge. I like your story.

 

[The Judge]

Well, I don't know if I'm psychic, but since I'd come here first and knew summat was up, as soon as I saw the word "trucks" I guessed -- too many Christmases spent watching that damn advert I suppose...


Thanks, GreenKidx! Glad you liked it.

 

[Ursa major]

I finally thought of something. Thank goodness this month's entry didn't have to be a genre piece. (Thanks, SF!)


* Wipes brow in relief. *


By the way, all the hyphenated words are recognised forms. However, the story's only seventy-four words long, so I can afford to lose one of the hyphens....

 

[chrispenycate]

As for the stories themselves, too many good ones to mention. I'm not sure about the historical accuracy of Chris's Agrarian Revolution, though... (led by one William Till?!) And it looks to me as if poor HareBrain is working too hard...

Historical accuracy? No vun said anyzink about historical accuracy. The dialectic spits upon history, eczept ven history says vot ve vant it to.

Hidden somezink? Aber Chrispy neffer hides … ja, der is a hidden somezink, as a refolutionary change, so zere!

Unt Wilhelm show, not Tell, unt definitely not Till his plot. His lot off land. So.

 

[TheDustyZebra]

Hah, I like that, Allanon! And a good move, hiding the last word (I know sometimes there's something in my brain that's just immediately attracted to the final word or line) and once you read it, completely changes the perspective of the story!

Yeah, my brain does the same thing -- jump to the end first, and spoil the whole thing. Good move, making it impossible for me to do that without some effort!

 

[Wannabewriter]

Yay! first piece entered!
I think its ok, didn't take me long to write. Maybe is should have waited to post it at the end so its fresh in people's minds when voting opens... oh well

 

[GreenKidx]

You're welcome judge. And I was considering the same thing wannabe . But I just posted it when it came to me.

 

[chrispenycate]

Yay! first piece entered!
I think its ok, didn't take me long to write. Maybe is should have waited to post it at the end so its fresh in people's minds when voting opens... oh well

No, I think people read early pieces more times, and get to know them. And if someone else has a similar idea (can happen, even with this diverse mob) it's that one that looks derivative, not yours.

On the other hand, you don't get to size up your opposition as much, and those last little retouches (which you only see when you've posted, nach') don't get the same attention…

 

[digs]

I think some of yours went over my head, Wannabe, but it has a really nice flow! I got swept up.

 

[Wannabewriter]

yeah digs, Jack kicks Jill off the hill (the hill represents the people of a nation)
Jack thinks he is in control now, being able to order the beast around.
Jill shatters his belief explaining how the beast (being the evil in people that helped Jack take the hill in the first place) is really there to make sure jack has the hill's needs met. So Jack has no real power just the idea of power, and he'll live a lie till he dies

But I hope in next month's topic I can do better, no, I will!

 

[Moonbat]

Ursa, yours was great, made me chuckle. I should have known to expect something of that ilk, but I think that is a serious (or should that be silly) contender.

I have mine nearly ready to post, but I'm just re-editing it, not sure if I like it now I've read so many of the others!

 

[Allanon]

Dammit Ursa!! That's GOOD!

 

[Parson]

Ursa -- Hilarious!!

Mag -- That story had a "1984" feel to it.

 

[Karn Maeshalanadae]

Ursa did indeed come up with a good one, and dare I say, I can see how it could be the downfall of a society that relies on transport.