What was the WORST movie you've ever seen?

[Shane Enochs]

Super Mario Bros was really awful, as I recall. That one probably wins this.

Maybe if we collectively decide that that movie never happened, it'll disappear from existence.

 

[Anathem]

I can't remember which one it was, but it was either The Transporter or one of it's sequels. It is the only movie where I couldn't make it to the end, and actually walked out of theater 1/2 way through it was so bad.

 

[psychotick]

Hi,

Highlander II. On its own this would simply have been a bad movie, but as a sequel to what is one of my favourite movies of all time, it really has to be flushed down a toilet, along with whoever wrote it, directed it, and produced it.

It does though illustrate the answer to an important question, how do you make a bad sequel. The answer or at least the first step is to throw away the script.

Cheers, Greg.

 

[EricWard]

Let it be known that I generally love garbage movies (Troll 2 , Robot Monster, and The Room are some of my favorites). Bad horror/sci-fi typically make for at least passable comedies. But the worst, worst, worst thing that I have ever seen in my life is Black Devil Doll from Hell.

A movie shot in the mid-80s, on a VHS camera in the director's house, where a devil-possessed ventriloquist dummy repeatedly rapes a woman for about 60 minutes. And then the movie ends. That is literally 80% of the movie.

The biggest shock? That the movie was actually released. Not even so-bad-it's-good. Far worse than Manos, Eegah! or anything MST3K ever did.

There is not enough liquor in the world to make that seem like a good idea.

 

[JunkMonkey]

Black Devil Doll from Hell is lurking on my hard drive somewhere. I've never been desperate enough for a bad movie fix to watch it.

Last night I thoroughly enjoyed the awfulness of Jess Franco's Kiss Me Monster. I may have to watch it again tonight to see if I can make any sense of it at all.

 

[Kylara]

Hmm has to be a seriously weird Dante's Inferno animation. Putting aside the weirdly sexual representations of the 'bosses' (it was made and based on the game) each section was designed by a different house, so the colouring, shape, size, look in fact the entire thing changed everytime we moved on a level, so much so that we were constantly checking with each other who was who and whether we were going mad or is his guide now a massive 6ft+ axe weilding scary person...very strange and far too weirdly disjointed to make much sense...basically they made a movie of the game very badly without any of the drawing houses talking to each other and with a different storyline to the game...fairly decent animation but waaaay too weird...here it is http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dante%27s_Inferno:_An_Animated_Epic

 

[Cayal]

Twilight...followed by Hunger Games.

Yes I said it.

 

[Kylara]

Hmm Snakes on a Plane, whilst funny was just too much suspension of disbelief. Reptiles in the hold will not be able to move about like that it is faaaaarrrr too cold. Also I never understood how that barricade they made on the stairs would work. They are snakes -_-
Also the Land of the Lost was terrible. I tend to love awful films, purely for their awfulness...but these were just terrible.
And Cayal, totally agree and wish to add the remake of Inglorious Basterds to the list of horrificness...actually everything that Tarantino has ever made or directed.

 

[kshRox]

Batman Rises is right up there near the top.
Anything after The Highlander with Christopher Lambert.
Just about anything with Will Ferrel with the exception of his Nascar Spoof and Stranger than Fiction.

 

[biodroid]

kshRox - do you mean Dark Knight Rises? Why was it so bad. I thought it was brilliant, and the profits it generated also suggest the same.

 

[JunkMonkey]

kshRox - do you mean Dark Knight Rises? Why was it so bad. I thought it was brilliant, and the profits it generated also suggest the same.

Hmmmm the good old Hollywood 'If it makes instant sh*tloads of money it must be good, if it doesn't make instant sh*tloads of money it must be bad' logic.

 

[kshRox]

kshRox - do you mean Dark Knight Rises? Why was it so bad. I thought it was brilliant, and the profits it generated also suggest the same.

I know a lot of people liked it, but I couldn't stand it.
The villain was pathetic, the plot too diffused, the relationships made no sense. The first scene struck me as absolutely ridiculous and unworkable. (I thought the reboot was all about getting away from the cartoony aspects and portraying a more realistic story)

. . . and from there it went downhill.

I agree with this review completely.

 

[CyBeR]

Sorry, I stopped reading that review at the point in which it starts calling people that have enjoyed the film simple minded idiots from his great, lofty reviewer heights.
...
Actually wait, let's soldier on. A great problem of his is that the movie didn't feature Batman enough for his tastes, because God forbid a super hero movie did anything different from the norm.
And the review ends in babble about concepts he willfully ignores from the film (or plain did not get), and assumptions about the creators of the film. As he says, classy.

I don't have anything against people not enjoying something I did, it's only natural. Des gustibus non disputandum and all that. I just got a bone to pick with the entire film review media for all their inconsistencies, grand standing and elitistic ********.

 

[JunkMonkey]

Cyber, that reviewer doesn't call anyone an idiot, simple minded or otherwise. He does say:

There will be people who like this film. I will submit that mostly they’re bamboozled by some combination of: ...

Which is not the same thing.

And as it had occurred to me (as I was watching it) that:

if The Dark Knight had not had the hypnotically intense presence of Heath Ledger, it would’ve just been a too-long, too-loud mess?

...I doubt if I will bother going to see Dark Knight Rises anyway.

 

[Stephen4444]

Star Wars Episode I,II and III were a travesty.

 

[CyBeR]

Cyber, that reviewer doesn't call anyone an idiot, simple minded or otherwise. He does say:

Which is not the same thing.

And as it had occurred to me (as I was watching it) that:



...I doubt if I will bother going to see Dark Knight Rises anyway.

That may be as you say, but I choose to feel insulted by his list, and by his review.
You do not feel that it's insulting for someone to interpret you liking a film to you just being "bamboozled" by a sexy woman in tight clothes.
I however, do feel it's insulting and will have none of it.

 

[JunkMonkey]

That may be as you say, but I choose to feel insulted by his list, and by his review.
You do not feel that it's insulting for someone to interpret you liking a film to you just being "bamboozled" by a sexy woman in tight clothes.
I however, do feel it's insulting and will have none of it.

That's your right. Though I just want in on record that if Anne Hathaway wants to come round to my house and try bamboozle the hell out of me I wouldn't complain.

 

[kshRox]

I do think people waited so long and wanted to like the movie so bad that they may have turned a bit of a blind eye on many of its flaws.

 

[CyBeR]

In my case I did not expect the return of the Joker honestly. That, and I am incredibly flexible when it comes to liking things. I do not go into a lot of movies expecting to see Moon or Cidade de deus or Lord of war, or whatever "smarter" film that I've ever seen. I go in for a good time and will come out feeling disappointed if I did not have a good time, if there was NOTHING in the film worth the time and effort of watching it (case in point, something like the Resident Evil: Afterlife...I could honestly not enjoy a moment of it because of how ludicrous EVERYTHING was, from visuals, to a plane that keeps on flying, to an organization turning more people into zombies AFTER the freaking Zombie Apocalypse).

As for Batman, I quite enjoyed it on what it had.
Bane as a villain to me was a great choice, he felt like someone that could take on Batman in a fist fight and actually conquer him. I liked the muzzle concept as it made him impervious to any show of emotion, thus getting him characterized on a pure verbal level (which I enjoyed as I got a handle on the character quite well).
The breaking of the bat was a well executed moment in which an overconfident Batman is brought to his knees by the very elements that were his usual safe spots.
The rise of the bat was again well made. I've seen enough such exposition in comics to not be bothered by it one bit (as I've seen most people were). If he would've been told the story or not, the outcome would have been the very same, just that someone else would have had to enlighten him as to why his lady love suddenly stabbed him.

And there are other elements because of which I liked the film. There are FAR worse superhero movies out there (The fantastic four anyone?), and there are better (Spider Man 2 - with the single most ridiculous scene in the whole genre -, The dark knight), but this I wouldn't drop down to the bottom of the list.

I will echo what kshRox said: Some people may have waited so long for this film, and wanted it so bad to be as good as the previous one, that they may have inflated some of its flaws. The reverse can be as equally justified.

 

[Action Avenue]

Cabin Boy (from 1994 starring Chris Elliott)