Discussion -- March 2015 75-word Writing Challenge

[johnnyjet]

Thanks, Perp, for the great review!

 

[Dan Jones]

...aaaaaand I've caught up!

@Starbeast - Lord Vader Visits The New Death Star - Unless I'm very much mistaken, this is the first time the phrase 'Death Star' has been used to describe someone's, um, someone's, er...you know what I mean. Beast really plumbs the bowels of toilet humour in this sphincter-centric snigger-fest complete with anal onomatopaeia. There can't be many times we all feel sorry for the Emp, but we've all been in those situations where the loo feels like a galaxy far, far away...

@johnnyjet - The Epic Adventures of Art and Cal - if you're looking for a Kevin Smith-esque retelling of Arthurian legend for the slacker generation set in space, then look no further. It's easy to snipe and laugh at Art's cynical thoughts upon securing the legendary trinket, but who among us could say we'd set aside our own cynicism upon being lobbed the aforementioned bibelot in favour of more noble inclinations? I'd be on Ebay before you could say Camelot.

@martin321 - Staying Alive After A Rush Job? - Forget space opera. It's all about space DISCO, baby! Meko would be proud of this reimagining, and I think deep down Vader would have been, too. In fact, I reckon Vader's minions aren't just inadvertently undercutting their masters' austere annihilative goals with a dab of colour, they're making an unconscious effort to unite the galaxy through funk and disco! Come to think of it, if Senator Palpatine (he of the rumbling rectum) had indulged in a bit more Stylistics and a bit less Sidious-tics then everyone might have been a great deal happier, eh?

@mosaix - Set Phasers to Stunning - it took a re-read of the first lines to get where this was going, but I absolutely loved the sex-reversals. This is pure fun, especially with Kirk (or whichever 'poor' chap it is down there) getting a taste of his own, um, torpedos! Great, laugh-out-loud last line; I mean, talk about a Bird of Prey...

 

[Parson]

@Phyrebrat -- That was hilarious! And if there is ever a question about the nerdiest of this forum your joke should serve is proof positive that this is the place for nerds.

 

[Kerrybuchanan]

@David Doherty-Jebb. Great first challenge entry. I nearly choked on my scampi!

 

[David Doherty-Jebb]

@David Doherty-Jebb. Great first challenge entry. I nearly choked on my scampi!

Thanks, Kerry! I shall post scampi alerts in future challenges, hehe

 

[johnnyjet]

Thanks, DG, for the cool review.

 

[Phyrebrat]

Parson! Thank you. I was not going to even enter this month as all my ideas were so derivative and not funny. I think I'll stick to horror; comedy's not exactly my strong suit. (BTW springs, this isn't a grumble on the theme or genre, which I think is great, just my skills )

pH

 

[Xenosia]

I've never done anything like this before, but I threw something out there anyway. *Curses the sky wondering where Karn could be* "I did it for you!" *Screaming loudly as if to attract attention* Phew. Well, I'm no writer, but it'll do.

 

[Phyrebrat]

There don't seem to be many entries this month - am I mis-remembering previous months?

Come on people, make me laugh!

pH

 

[chrispenycate]

There don't seem to be many entries this month - am I mis-remembering previous months?

Come on people, make me laugh!

pH

So, 44 is not a record breaker, by any means - but it's not catastrophic, either, and we still have Culhwch, David Evil Overlord, jastius, J.L.Borstlap, Karn Maeshalanadae, reiver33, Robert Mackay, Teresa Edgerton, The Judge and TheDustyZebra who generally submit something, and haven't yet, some of whom consider it unseemly not to wait until the last possible instant (that list looks oddly incomplete without Ursa). Indeed, it has occurred that we've not been into the forties by this point, and still finished comfortably beyond life, the universe and everything.

Or it could just be that some or all have atrophied senses of humour?

 

[Hex]

I did! I have! Have mercy with your list or Bowler will be along to zap me with his ray gun.

 

[Phyrebrat]

A-haaaa. Well that makes sense, I think the early Ursa-post threw my expectations somewhat ...

pH

 

[Bowler1]

I did! I have! Have mercy with your list or Bowler will be along to zap me with his ray gun.

Not till midnight, so you have until then to hide.

Now I know life can seem very unfair sometimes Hex, and I do know you have already posted, but I'd never dream of questioning Chrispy - king of the lists (a minor GOD too, which puts Chrispy second only to Google in my world)(Its a small world, population 1). I promise not to search too hard or look in the usual spots (and if you believe that!), so you have a good sporting chance of not being zapped.

 

[Ursa major]

DON'T PANIC!​

 

[Juliana]

DON'T PANIC!​

In large and friendly letters...

 

[Ursa major]

I think the (automatic) italics make it look a bit panicky....

 

[ratsy]

The green color calmed me Ursa...now had it been red, I would have jumped out of my window!

 

[Moonbat]

Aww I'm no longer considered a regular entrant

I figured waiting until the last minute to write something would add to the urgency.

 

[The Judge]

I'm in, but I'm not sure whether with all the current TV allusions it's comprehensible to anyone outside the UK. Actually, the way I've mangled it, it's probably not comprehensible to anyone inside the UK...

I do wonder whether I should have had a beheading or two in there, though. Just to up the urgency stakes.

 

[chrispenycate]

Sorry Hex - among the characteristics I share with the Greek pantheon is a shortage of infallibility. But Bowler can't see the error any more (and I've been - perfecting - his RAYGUNs).

But please, Moonbat, do feel free to squeeze in your submission at the last minute. You've still got hours - no ungency yet.