Discussion Thread -- March 2016 75-word Writing Challenge

[Bob Senior]

HOWDY,
This month is gonna be a rough one for me.
I was sittin' around with Paw and Maw discussin' what I might rite for a space story.
Paw said, "Them damn young people don't know what the hell there talkin' about, space crap stuff, what about all them people in China,?
specially the old ones!"
Maw said, "Paw's always rite, I'm gonna kill a chicken."

Sorry folks, Paw 'n' Maw are gittin old an cranky.

Bob

 

[Starbeast]

@Bob Senior Howdy-hey-there Bob. Nice to see you again. I hope you change your mind and join us.


As usual, paranoia made me skim through the stories to see if any was close to my tale, before I posted. My idea struck me while I was shoveling snow this morning. I refined it in my mind as I took care of business today, then I wrote it out when I returned.

Enough of the boring details. I'm in.

I noticed we have two reviewers remarking on the tales already. Cool.

Now to read everyone's story before mine.

 

[Shyrka]

Pentagon – A patient muses on the true cost of the transformation he’s about to undergo.

Robert Mackay – The author brings new meaning to the term ‘Space Opera’ with this soaring tale of a virtuoso pilot.

Starbeast – The crew of a transport vessel let greed override their better judgement. It can't possibly end well...

Tim Murray – An astronaut explorer is welcomed to a new world in this dream-like story of discovery.

 

[Ajid]

It is very easy when cutting text that short to produce something incomprehensible, without the author (who saw all the intermediate stages) recognising the loss. At a guess, before I started exploring verse forms, my 'yer wot?' enties were about thirty percent. Now, of course, that's risen considerably - but nobody expects to understand poetry, so that passes. But even this experience is valuable in the larger canvas of commercial writing - it points out that overediting can, in refining the details, lose the overall story.

I think this is very true. In fact I have struggled with short stories and in particular those of 3000 or less to understand the leaps a reader can or can't make. I personaly joined the chrons because it gave me a way of exploring new ways of writing and ways to improve my writing. I watched for months before joining. Word limits have always been a struggle for me. As such I welcome criticism and honest criticism. However some may feel this done publicly is embarrassing or uncomfortable. As such I welcome private messages warning me if such stories are incompressible to the reader, infact I encourage them.

I don't do much in the online world so this may not be a great idea but I wonder if a thread for those who have posted a story and would like an honest critique, maybe after the vote, would be a viable idea?

 

[Zoe Mackay]

We have one of those!

Improving our 75-word stories

 

[Ajid]

We have one of those!

Improving our 75-word stories

Exactly what I'm looking for. Many thanks RM.

I'm really enjoying the stories so far. Wonderful choice CC.

 

[hopewrites]

I've had a lot of help from that thread. Even if it wasn't my story being discussed, I could catch what the author intended and see what worked and what didn't.

I've recently started to come at my stories differently, starting with a summary, and if I can keep that under the word count adding in details that enhance the overall sense of the thing. (Hasn't kept me from quashing in so much detail that the sense is lost on occasion, but that's a different problem to tackle than hacking off so much the sense is lost.)

 

[Bowler1]

I'm in - I'm in - I'm in.... and so on.

I had two good ideas this month, but one didn't fit the theme so never made the cut. With that I'm off. Beam me up Scotty.

 

[Mr Orange]

@Ajid, the improving thread is great if you can't figure out why your story didn't work with people. by the way, a lack of votes does not mean that your story wasn't any good - votes are few and far between. if you get mentions then that generally means your story has worked (to some extent at least).

regarding the vicious culling required and the loss of meaning this causes, i'm one of those "cr@p i need to cut 100 words out to get my story to 75" kind of guys. this has turned my story to pointless drivel in the past. i find it's really helpful to let the story sit for a couple of days after chopping. then when you come back to it, it's a bit more obvious as to how much of the important stuff you've actually cut out.

good stories so far everyone - @Robert Mackay, you haven't been reading The Chimes lately have you?

 

[Zoe Mackay]

@Robert Mackay, you haven't been reading The Chimes lately have you?

No. Is it good? It's the book by Anna Small?

 

[Bowler1]

Ajid it's good to see you dip your toe into the water and take a chance. There is plenty of help around here for 75 words and longer sections in the Critiques section, all easily found. Its all fun in the 75 word section and I would say having a go is far more important than success. I had the best part of two years without a single vote for all my efforts (I have taken my frustration out on everyone, by shooting them!), but that made my first vote all the sweeter. Since then I have come 2nd twice and 1st once, which has been great. So stick with it I say.

I've also posted two 75 competition entries with me as the central hero - I had no votes for my efforts, but to the very best of my knowledge I'm the only member to actually star (where I belong, shining brightly) in the monthly competition. So go for it.

 

[Shyrka]

@Ajid I've not been doing this long myself but it seems much harder to get votes in the 75-worder as everyone only gets a single vote. Don't worry about it: just getting a mention in someone's short-list is exciting enough! When I got votes in the 300-worder I was grinning so hard the top of my head nearly fell off.

I must confess I'm one of the 'write loads and then trim' brigade so I'm expecting to get a 'buh?' reaction eventually. It's been a particularly painful process this month with both of my candidates coming in at 120+ words. The process of paring them back was like choosing which limbs to live without.

I've not submitted either of my previous 75-worders for critique since both have done well enough (several short-listings each, more than enough for me) but I probably will at some point. I submitted a larger extract in the critique section and, whilst it was very nerve-wracking and something of an emotional rollercoaster, it was a great help. I'd heartily recommend you do the same when you've got something you're happy with.

 

[Pentagon]

I have to confess, my entry was the sum of a ton of idea's that had been fleeting about my head for some time- so it was a really interesting task to sum up a ton of sources that had been bubbling about the head and then try and explain a concept! I ended up at 95 words shaved down to 85, then realised it was 75 not 85!

I really liked Tim's Denarah, it has a sophisticated style that appeals and to see that meshed with such a fantastical concept, but it still works. Perhaps, I'm associating the ending to be darker than author intended. But in that respect, it reminded me a lot of Charles Kingsley's Water Babies.

 

[hopewrites]

@Bowler1 I'm frequently in my entries, (anything I write first with anthropomorphic characters) and I recall @Tim James doing a stunning entry where he proved he nether entered nor did his customary comments. I want to think @Jo Zebedee did one with her in as well...

 

[Shyrka]

Uruss – A desperate expedition fails to live up to its promise with harrowing consequences.

Bowler1 – They say hell is other people but a transporter malfunction presents an entirely new twist on the problem for this explorer.

chrispenycate – The consequences of environmental mismanagement return to haunt the human race in this tale of disaster at the brink of redemption.

Cascade – An intergalactic crusader contemplates his just rewards for bringing a galaxy of unbelievers to his god. By any means necessary.

 

[Victoria Silverwolf]

Droflet -- The author provides an amusing spoof of an old fairy tale and a modern myth.

Shyrka -- This tale of endings and beginnings creates a new legend.

Pentagon -- This story offers the reader a philosophical meditation on the nature of the self.

Robert Mackay -- A tribute to artistic creation can be found in this cosmic tale.

Starbeast -- Through a parody of popular culture, a wry look at the lack of logic in human decisions is portrayed.

Tim Murray -- Through a magical encounter an allegory of the importance of trust is created.

Uruss -- This melancholy story shows us that not all dreams can come true.

Bowler1 -- This imaginative story offers a satiric look at the imperfections of technology.

chrispenycate -- The elegant poem provides a vast vision, both light and dark.

Cascade -- This character study offers a look into the nature of faith.

Sigfrid von Shrink -- Through two unusual characters this story teaches us about romance.

 

[Droflet]

Thank you, Lady Victoria. Reading your reviews is the highlight of my day. Yeah, I don't get out much.

 

[Victoria Silverwolf]

willwallace -- Through wit and irony the author examines the nature of jealousy.

Alex Darion -- This darkly comic tale deals with the unexpected consequences of our assumptions.

Calliopenjo -- The importance of both imagination and hard facts is demonstrated in this colorful story.

 

[Cascade]

thanks @Shyrka and @Victoria Silverwolf for the reviews

 

[willwallace]

Thanks for the reviews, Victoria. Brilliant as usual.