Surely not in anticipation of a roasting...?
(And there's really no need: it's a very good entry, IMHO.
)
DISCUSSION -- The 75 word Challenge, April 2011
- Thread starter The Judge
- Start date
- Status
(And there's really no need: it's a very good entry, IMHO.
)
goldenapples
of the sun
Good stuff
- Joined
- Jun 13, 2006
- Messages
- 6,381
Well... a lot of early posts this month, it was hard for me to keep up (well that and being busy doing other things...). But I've managed to catch up, and no matter what people seem to appreciate my silly little comments, so I'll try and keep them coming.
Karn – I thought that this might just pan out to have a sweet ending, but Karn completely wrong - footed me with the last line. Always nice to be fooled, I could see how there could be more of it. As has been noted the cuddly bunnies and happily ever afters are immediately thrown into abeyance.
PM – (or from my angle the other PM...) For something that was written so quickly this poem is for me a near masterpiece, not only did I like the ‘story’ to it, but the rhyming did not feel forced, and the use of words was spot on.
Mouse – And so the fairy tale is at last brought to an end, well until next month when our characters come back as the undead... (The undead taken on fairy tale land? Might be some mileage in that Mouse). As always well written and good fun.
Hex – The first one that is rather light in nature, although still no happy ending in sight. You may well change the man, but not his nature. I have to admit I chuckled at this one!
Harebrain – And this one made me laugh out loud. I’ve caught myself out slightly by already commenting on this one, but to reiterate, it was well written, good, entertaining with a theme to make Pyan smile and enough puns to make a polar bear dance.
Talysia - I found this to be rather touching (and maybe just a little creepy), for a brief moment it reminded me of the last moments of Medium (TV show), but it was totally different to that. I had to wonder whether the male character actually knew that she was dead... another top tale.
Perp - I'm quite pleased with this really, it's not the story that I wanted to write, but it does its job, I'm pleased with it, and it frees me for the 300 worder.
Alchemist - A really nice and different take on the theme, otherworldly in nature, not the best of endings for the male character, but a near perfect one for the tale as it is told, slightly different to what I expected.
Mygoditsraining – Almost the opposite of Alchemist’s tale, and just as good. It seems to speak of the egocentric superiority of man, how he’ll do whatever he wants, beyond love of the other realm. (Of course if he had gone back he might have ended up with a knife in his heart)
Gary Compton – Quite a good little horror story, conveyed in just 75 words, and a nice alternative take on the theme. I particularly liked the ‘punch line’ mostly because I did not see it coming...
Demonomania – I’m not sure what to make of this one, it is a wonderfully descriptive piece. I feel it is one of those that could have done being a bit longer than 75 words, but hey, that’s just me.
Crystal Haven – A kind of ethereal touch, and a melancholic feel to this little piece, beautiful in it’s own way. The feel of a genuine haunting , lost souls forever searching. Great entry.
Arkose – A particularly interesting piece, drawing on Japanese mythology, but unique in its own right. I have to say that I really enjoyed it, even more so when drawing upon the story of Kiyohime, an ending almost tragic. Superb.
Boneman – a great SF story, with some wonderful (if a little creepy) ideas. Clones or machines playing the roles of men, but actually looking like those absent? Brrrr, but I loved the idea that love could transcend that, punctuated nicely with a bittersweet ending.
No-One – Well I never! This one was just so rude!!! Whatever were those two lights getting up to at the end? Blink Blink Blink indeed! Seriously I really liked it, romantic in a totally different way, and warming at the same time. Strange how to totally insignificant objects an actually raise an emotional reaction.
Anne Martin – Its really nice to see an entry that proves that 75 words is not a necessity to tell a story beautifully, and capture the theme so beautifully. A great entry.
Brev – An interesting one this. In some ways it almost seems almost real, a great evening and date, turned on its head by the reading of the tarot cards. Well told and the right amount of uncertainty (well in my mind) and the desire to know what happened next!
Digs – A brilliant, touching one, and so real. I know older people who have done similar things, holding on to their lost love, almost as if their lost love is still there somewhere... and they deny any belief that they might still be around. An absolute corker!
Aun Dorback – I learned something from this one, so always a good start. Is he holding onto a memory, or is it the ghost of his lover, well told and written, a nice turn on the theme.
TE – I felt there was a subtle power in this one, it was very fairy tale-ish in nature, beautifully told with a nice warm ending – an actual happy ever after (well as far as we know). But Teresa, are bears ugly? Cubs are cute and if it was a full grown one charging me I would not stand around to find out.
TDZ – Took a bit of reading this one because of all the alien words, but it was superb, well told, and humorous, well it made me chuckle. There is also an element of truth in there too.
OBP – Ahhh almost sweet, but not too sweet. A beautiful little attempt this one, I wonder where it was going, and was not disappointed when the word fairy was mentioned, and the ast line just made it for me.
HT – Two reads for me to appreciate this one, but what a great little tale. A nice turn on someone trying to see their loved ones after death, and an nice ending, with positions reversed. Almost thought that he was looking forward to dying again until I read the last line.
Tonk Rivers – A newbie! And quite a nice story as well, I can’t quite make up my mind what to think about it, other than it is enjoyable and can be read in different ways that makes it all the more special. Loved the character names too, not a bard attempt at all.
goldenapples – Clever in it’s simplicity, this could be a framework for a longer story, but it works wonderfully like this, misdirecting the reader into what looks like a sad end, but becomes a happy one. But she should have listened to the raven.
A plethora of great entries already, and with more to come this could well be another magnificent month!
Karn – I thought that this might just pan out to have a sweet ending, but Karn completely wrong - footed me with the last line. Always nice to be fooled, I could see how there could be more of it. As has been noted the cuddly bunnies and happily ever afters are immediately thrown into abeyance.
PM – (or from my angle the other PM...) For something that was written so quickly this poem is for me a near masterpiece, not only did I like the ‘story’ to it, but the rhyming did not feel forced, and the use of words was spot on.
Mouse – And so the fairy tale is at last brought to an end, well until next month when our characters come back as the undead... (The undead taken on fairy tale land? Might be some mileage in that Mouse). As always well written and good fun.
Hex – The first one that is rather light in nature, although still no happy ending in sight. You may well change the man, but not his nature. I have to admit I chuckled at this one!
Harebrain – And this one made me laugh out loud. I’ve caught myself out slightly by already commenting on this one, but to reiterate, it was well written, good, entertaining with a theme to make Pyan smile and enough puns to make a polar bear dance.
Talysia - I found this to be rather touching (and maybe just a little creepy), for a brief moment it reminded me of the last moments of Medium (TV show), but it was totally different to that. I had to wonder whether the male character actually knew that she was dead... another top tale.
Perp - I'm quite pleased with this really, it's not the story that I wanted to write, but it does its job, I'm pleased with it, and it frees me for the 300 worder.
Alchemist - A really nice and different take on the theme, otherworldly in nature, not the best of endings for the male character, but a near perfect one for the tale as it is told, slightly different to what I expected.
Mygoditsraining – Almost the opposite of Alchemist’s tale, and just as good. It seems to speak of the egocentric superiority of man, how he’ll do whatever he wants, beyond love of the other realm. (Of course if he had gone back he might have ended up with a knife in his heart)
Gary Compton – Quite a good little horror story, conveyed in just 75 words, and a nice alternative take on the theme. I particularly liked the ‘punch line’ mostly because I did not see it coming...
Demonomania – I’m not sure what to make of this one, it is a wonderfully descriptive piece. I feel it is one of those that could have done being a bit longer than 75 words, but hey, that’s just me.
Crystal Haven – A kind of ethereal touch, and a melancholic feel to this little piece, beautiful in it’s own way. The feel of a genuine haunting , lost souls forever searching. Great entry.
Arkose – A particularly interesting piece, drawing on Japanese mythology, but unique in its own right. I have to say that I really enjoyed it, even more so when drawing upon the story of Kiyohime, an ending almost tragic. Superb.
Boneman – a great SF story, with some wonderful (if a little creepy) ideas. Clones or machines playing the roles of men, but actually looking like those absent? Brrrr, but I loved the idea that love could transcend that, punctuated nicely with a bittersweet ending.
No-One – Well I never! This one was just so rude!!! Whatever were those two lights getting up to at the end? Blink Blink Blink indeed! Seriously I really liked it, romantic in a totally different way, and warming at the same time. Strange how to totally insignificant objects an actually raise an emotional reaction.
Anne Martin – Its really nice to see an entry that proves that 75 words is not a necessity to tell a story beautifully, and capture the theme so beautifully. A great entry.
Brev – An interesting one this. In some ways it almost seems almost real, a great evening and date, turned on its head by the reading of the tarot cards. Well told and the right amount of uncertainty (well in my mind) and the desire to know what happened next!
Digs – A brilliant, touching one, and so real. I know older people who have done similar things, holding on to their lost love, almost as if their lost love is still there somewhere... and they deny any belief that they might still be around. An absolute corker!
Aun Dorback – I learned something from this one, so always a good start. Is he holding onto a memory, or is it the ghost of his lover, well told and written, a nice turn on the theme.
TE – I felt there was a subtle power in this one, it was very fairy tale-ish in nature, beautifully told with a nice warm ending – an actual happy ever after (well as far as we know). But Teresa, are bears ugly? Cubs are cute and if it was a full grown one charging me I would not stand around to find out.
TDZ – Took a bit of reading this one because of all the alien words, but it was superb, well told, and humorous, well it made me chuckle. There is also an element of truth in there too.
OBP – Ahhh almost sweet, but not too sweet. A beautiful little attempt this one, I wonder where it was going, and was not disappointed when the word fairy was mentioned, and the ast line just made it for me.
HT – Two reads for me to appreciate this one, but what a great little tale. A nice turn on someone trying to see their loved ones after death, and an nice ending, with positions reversed. Almost thought that he was looking forward to dying again until I read the last line.
Tonk Rivers – A newbie! And quite a nice story as well, I can’t quite make up my mind what to think about it, other than it is enjoyable and can be read in different ways that makes it all the more special. Loved the character names too, not a bard attempt at all.
goldenapples – Clever in it’s simplicity, this could be a framework for a longer story, but it works wonderfully like this, misdirecting the reader into what looks like a sad end, but becomes a happy one. But she should have listened to the raven.
A plethora of great entries already, and with more to come this could well be another magnificent month!
MstrTal
Valeyard
- Joined
- Feb 10, 2011
- Messages
- 622
Ok That was harder than I thought it would be!
In the end the writing turned out nothing like I thought it would. Just pruning it down to 75 words turned it into something completely other than what I would of normally wrote. At this point I just hope I was able to get my main idea across. Because I really really liked what I originally came up with and as much as I normally dislike writing short stories I am going to have to write it out as a story in its own right.
In the end the writing turned out nothing like I thought it would. Just pruning it down to 75 words turned it into something completely other than what I would of normally wrote. At this point I just hope I was able to get my main idea across. Because I really really liked what I originally came up with and as much as I normally dislike writing short stories I am going to have to write it out as a story in its own right.
- Joined
- Mar 9, 2007
- Messages
- 6,485
Thanks PM , very kind words!
I had to check on Wiki for the 'mechanics' of a ballad and for once put pen to paper before typing it on screen - may do this in future as writing rather than typing makes me think more. The only line I had planned was the final line of the final stanza , and the rest of the (albeit short) ballad revolved around this.
I had to check on Wiki for the 'mechanics' of a ballad and for once put pen to paper before typing it on screen - may do this in future as writing rather than typing makes me think more. The only line I had planned was the final line of the final stanza , and the rest of the (albeit short) ballad revolved around this.
Is it just me or has there been a flurry of posting since Teresa revealed that the 2nd page was the place to be?
In my defense I thought I'd be somewhere near the bottom of page one...
And thanks to PM for the mini-review! Always entertaining.
Hm, I seem to have developed a fondness for this spot on a page. I call dibs. This is now my spot and no one is allowed to sit here (and yes, I wrote that without even thinking of my username, but it works anyway
)*
Last edited:
But which page 2?
Some of us have our page length set to more than 15 posts.
Some of us have our page length set to more than 15 posts.
Mine will go wherever on the page it happens to fall, when I get it written. At present it is a fraction under eight hundred and fifty words, so still needs some mild editing.
MstrTal
Valeyard
- Joined
- Feb 10, 2011
- Messages
- 622
GAH! I just reread my submission & I Hate it.
Oh well live and learn. Never publish a 1st finished draft. The more I reread it the more I want to tweak this, reword that, substitute over here and omit that all together. Eh guess I will know better for next time.
Oh well live and learn. Never publish a 1st finished draft. The more I reread it the more I want to tweak this, reword that, substitute over here and omit that all together. Eh guess I will know better for next time.
Heck Tate
The Fleet Footed
Thanks, PM. I've only scanned the stories so far, so I'll have to go back through and pay better attention when I have the time, but for now they all look pretty good. Great theme and genre this month.
TacticalLoco
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Jan 6, 2011
- Messages
- 342
Is it just me or do we have a couple of stories of the SciFi genre?
I done 3 attempts at this challenge so far and the best of them came out science sounding.
I didn't want to use it becuase I thought the genre had to be paranormal. (?)
I done 3 attempts at this challenge so far and the best of them came out science sounding.
I didn't want to use it becuase I thought the genre had to be paranormal. (?)
Tonk Rivers
Active Member
- Joined
- Apr 1, 2011
- Messages
- 42
Thanks Perpetual Man. I wasn't sure whether to submit it now or wait?
Anyway glad you enjoyed it. What better character for paranormal romance then Shakespeare's ghost!
Anyway glad you enjoyed it. What better character for paranormal romance then Shakespeare's ghost!
TacticalLoco said:
"Paranormal Romance" as it is called (by the publishers who specialize in it) is actually Romance with elements of Science Fiction or Fantasy -- or SFF with elements of romance. I think I provided a link somewhere in this thread, but that was probably many pages ago, so for those who missed it and are still confused:
Paranormal romance - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
I had to look up "paranormal" to be sure that SF fell within the boundaries, and indeed it seemed to be ok. I didn't come across the actual "Paranormal romance" page, though. Must check it out.
Culhwch
Lost Boy
Alright, safely on the second page. I'm not going to lie, though, it feels kind of weird to post this early...
It feels kind of weird to see you post something this early.
Good story, though!
Good story, though!
Culhwch
Lost Boy
Thought I'd best get in early this month in case I don't get a chance later on. Plus I had the makings of a story before I usually do. Maybe this genre is for me!
onebigpotato
What's tatters Hobbit?
Wow guys, pretty chuffed with the kind words. FYI, the site works perfectly on my phone. Reading this at Brisbane Airport waiting to get out of here.
Went from pouring rain to the bluest sky I've ever seen. Brisbane, crazy.
Went from pouring rain to the bluest sky I've ever seen. Brisbane, crazy.
Culhwch
Lost Boy
Didn't realise you were in Brisbane, OBP! Business trip?
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