DISCUSSION -- February 2015 75-word Writing Challenge

[Victoria Silverwolf]

Thank you for sharing those two stories from a parallel world. The first is cheerful and also captures a very subtle touch of magic realism. The second is a heartfelt cry of agony, yet full of hope.

 

[Phyrebrat]

Congratulations to telford for a well-fought win! And a special nod to Crystal Haven for snapping at his heels

Belated thanks to TDZ for my second vote (I won't beat you with a stick, okay?), and to Darkchrome, Karn, johnnyjet, Ashleyne B Watts.

Perp, I really like the second one; as you can imagine I'm a fan of juxtaposing sadness and celebration and your entry was able to do this is a subtle, heart-pulling way. I also must admit to feeling a little educated when I read your entry because I hadn't thought of Nawlins in such a context.

As soon as I saw the theme, I thought of a more sedate Carnival in Venice, with the elaborate costumes and masks which completely conceal the wearer. (Hence my use of Italian names, and my decision -- which I agonized over! -- to use the word "minuetto" instead of "minuet".) I attempted to capture the difficult style of magic realism by having my rather befuddled protagonist accept the fantastic events which happen to him calmly, if ruefully. (I trust my intended symbolism of the final revelation was sufficiently lucid without being too obvious.)

As usual, I would enjoy knowing what went into the creation of the various entries.

I really liked yours and it sat in a similar compartment in my brain to Anne Martin's, because of the surreal images you both had in your tales. Anyway, I got it was Venice - I'm a total geek for the Renaissance and have spent a lot of time in Florence and Venice. It captured the ornate world of the Venice Carnival, so apart from it being a great tale in itself, the setting really appealed to me, too.

Like Perp, I had a bit of a process this month. I loved Springs' theme and of course - being the one-trick pony that I am - took it to mean the darker side of the carnival coin. I didn't have much of an idea other than the line of sunrise moving across the planet and cursed revelers having to dance in the line of dawn for eternity. I also had the words I was so busy looking for you, I lost myself. When I tried to write that, it seemed too pedestrian so I left it for a couple weeks until I had a dream where there was (okay, this is weird, I admit) a monster threatening to kill a girl who was made of spinach(!!!) and the monster was saying this rhyme to her;

You won't have time to cry,
You won't avoid the pain,
I'm going to eat you up
and save your little brain

The dream was so vivid, I woke up and typed it into my phone and then it evolved into the doggerel at the beginning of my entry; the voice of the carnival.

Okay, so who's next?

pH

 

[Ursa major]

In desperation -- I hadn't had a single idea by the start of the 23rd -- I decided to find out from where the name, Carnival, had come. One suggestion, Carne levare (literally "to remove meat", i.e. to remove meat from one's diet), suggested a number of things: including cannibalism. It seemed obvious that in a world where meat should not be eaten during a particular time of year, that would be doubly true for human flesh, meaning that any hungry cannibal would be particularly keen to eat their favoured food just before that period began.

The trouble is, cannibalism is not, in any way, magical in itself. Any of us could** do it (although, I hope, we wouldn't want to). So I needed to introduce magic in another way, and transformations seemed to be the way to go (particularly given one of the meanings of 'meat'). There didn't seem to be room in 75 words to have a proper chase, with the transformation as the final action, so I had to replace the chase with another bit of magic, in this case the removal (or making invisible) of clothing, revealing what the first transformation had done. The puns are mostly obvious, but for those that don't know, 'mardy' can mean 'sulky'.


** - I don't think that cannibalism, in the sense of eating human flesh, is illegal in the UK , although activities that may end in cannibalism, such as killing someone to eat them, obviously are.

 

[Karn Maeshalanadae]

Congratulations to Telford and here's to hoping we'll get a good shot this month.

 

[BigJ]

Congratulations to telford on the win, thanks to johnnyjet for the vote, and apologies for missing the chance to vote (for what it's worth, I think my vote would have also gone to telford).

 

[Tywin]

Congrats Telford!

 

[Bowler1]

I can give you the location of two targets. I can make 'em easy too. Can't get far if you leave 'em in a cage.

With a target painted on them.

I like my targets moving Perp, I think they call it sporting, I call it fun. Bowler1 takes a good look at Perp in his comfortable looking runners, wondering how quickly you can move in them? But I'll be nice, you can have a running start....

 

[Karn Maeshalanadae]

I'm wondering when we'll be getting the next one, actually...it IS the first today...

 

[Perpetual Man]

I like my targets moving Perp, I think they call it sporting, I call it fun. Bowler1 takes a good look at Perp in his comfortable looking runners, wondering how quickly you can move in them? But I'll be nice, you can have a running start....

I think I can hear two bunnies laughing somewhere...

 

[Starbeast]

I've just been outside.

I'd promised the young Perps that I'd try and put their trampoline back up today. (You'll see where this is going in a moment.)

I've been getting it in the neck, all day "Will we go on it today daddy?" "Is it done yet?" "Is that the last?"
" No it's the first...."

Then it started raining. Finished what I could, was starting to feel wet and cold before realising that we were flooding out side the back door. Dug an emergency trench through the drive way. Cut my hand somehow while doing it. Covered in blood, mud, water and a few other things probably better not to think about. At last I could go in. Then...

The rabbits.

They were up there in the garden, in the pouring rain. They had to go away. Covered in mud, wet, two viciously lethal balls of fur and claw and teeth, that turned me into a mass of scratches, while they were bundled blobs of mud.

For some reason I found myself thinking about telford's story again.

Anyhoo, a quick thanks to StilLearning who has stealth voted for me and thanks to those who mentioned mine. I'd look back through and name check people but I have scratches that need attending.

And possibly stitches...

Oh my gosh. That was quite an ordeal you've been through Perpetual Man. You must have looked like Indiana Jones, just after an adventure.

Telford, just back from the hospital, takes a deep breath. Firstly thanks to Dusty for the mention, Teresa for the runner up and Martin 321 for the vote. Many thanks to everyone for the congrats. Immensely grateful (and stunned speechless).

Crystal Haven, I expected sanity to prevail and that your cleverly amusing entry to get a dozen late votes. Commiserations, and well done.

Over the last five years on this wonderful site I've tried to keep up with the brilliance of my fellow Chrons and have not really been in the race. With my limited talents I've spent days, weeks working on a story that doesn't work. Considering the company I keep that isn't a problem. I just like to participate in the contest.

Now to the bunny. I knocked this out in ten minutes and gave it little thought after that. Life's funny like that.

I have submitted my thoughts for the March challenge and, if approved, should be a good bit of fun. Ursa will looooove this challenge but I'm sure all Chrons will step up. Good luck everyone, and have some fun with it.

Congratulations Telford

And Well done Crystal Haven​

You're definately right Telford, "Life is funny." Maybe not Ha-ha funny all the time, but it can be strangely surprising.

Bask in the glory my friend, you've earned it




Ok. My story was inspired by a carnival attraction I saw as a child, "The Woman Who could Change Into a Werewolf". Then I thought, ok, I'll throw in a detective and the rest wrote itself.

 

[Droflet]

Ah, yes. Ursa would have loved my original idea but it didn't pan out. It had something to do with, ah, puns. Oh well, maybe next time.

 

[TheDustyZebra]

Yes, isn't it a shame that Ursa won't be able to write a punny story?

 

[Parson]

Teresa: Thanks for the short listing.

Telford Congratulations on an earthy winner.

-----

I was flailing all month trying to come with any kind of an idea for "Magic Realism" and "Carnival/Mardi Gras etc." I believe it was on the last day that I remembered a Terri Gibbs song: "Somebody's Knocking." Which has the line: "Somebody's knocking. Should I let him in? Lord it's the devil. Would you look at him? I've heard about him, but I never dreamed, he'd have blue eyes and blue jeans." I added that to the feeling I've always had about Mardi Gras that it is a time when lots of people cast off their moral restraints, which led to thinking about how a demon would be disappointed to see this time of "sinning" come to an end. When thinking about that I thought about what a demon would do in a season where restraint was the order of the day.

 

[Glen]

Congratulations Telford on the win.

The Sydney Mardi Gras is this coming weekend, a "global beacon of diversity, acceptance and LGBTQI rights", (look it up, I had to). I felt a little uncomfortable using a limerick, not wanting to diminish the aims of the event in any way, but there was also something about it that made sense to me.

Now, what's next? An urgent, comic, space opera. Bingo!

 

[Juliana]

My entry was based on the Brazilian mythological character Boto. A boto is a sweet-water dolphin natural to the Amazon basin, and legend says that Boto is a were dolphin of sorts that haunts the region. He can transform into a handsome, well-dressed gentleman who roams the small villages along the river banks looking for women to seduce. In the old days, it was common for young, unmarried women who mysteriously turned up pregnant to blame it on the Boto... A rather handy myth. But I always loved the dark undertones to stories about this watery seducer.

 

[High Eight]

I suppose it's time to parade my choices, so here are the results of the Ursa jury:


Honourable Mentions:

• All the right moves by Luiglin
• The Disguise by Victoria Silverwolf
• Up Helly Aa by High Eight
• They all have floats round here. by Moonbat

Runners Up:

• Magic Trick by Mr Orange
  
• A Wicked Pack by Teresa Edgerton
• An Unfair Cop? by mosaix

Winner:

• The Parade of Spirits by johnnyjet

(In the above, each category is ordered by time of posting.)

Thanks for the mention, Ursa.

 

[High Eight]

Just a little note on my story for anybody who is interested: The Up Helly Aa is a solstice festival held in the Shetland islands. It culminates in a torchlight procession and the burning of a Viking ship (the galley). The whole thing is very Norse-influenced and it is easy to imagine those old warlike gods looking over your shoulder.

More here : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Up_Helly_Aa

 

[StilLearning]

Well done Telford, thank you to everyone who gave mine an honourable mention or listing. So sorry I'm not finding time at the moment to post proper lists of my own!

 

[Teresa Edgerton]

My story was (as those of you who know this about me will have guessed) partly inspired by the fact that I spent so many years reading Tarot cards at fairs and festivals. And then the fact that fortunetellers used to be a part of travelling carnivals (that's where my father learned to read tealeaves), and that some of the cities (like New Orleans) associated with Mardi Gras have traditions of magic and divination.

So that was the what I thought I might do. The inspiration came from two literary sources. One was T. S. Eliot's "The Wasteland," the section about Madame Sosostris and her wicked pack of cards. I borrowed her name although I simplified it to make it more readable. The other was a novel by Charles Williams* "The Greater Trumps," about what you might call the archetypal Tarot deck (perhaps the first one) and a chess set with the same figures, figures that move.

And from that came my idea that the magical element in my story was that the figures on the cards would rise up and dance (dancing also being an element of Mardi Gras and Carnivale). The first thought was that they would be three dimensional figures like Williams's chess set, but then I thought that since they were originally pictures, they would be flat like paper dolls.

Then I had to create a reading, but since I was limited as to words, I only included the last part of the spread I use.

And the reading led me to the last line, where I put in the girl's reaction and the cell-phone to represent the mundane element to contrast with the magic.


____

*(Parson, if you've never read anything by Charles Williams, his fantasy novels might be of interest to you. Like Tolkien and Lewis he was a man of deep faith, and he used myth and magic as metaphors for a type of unconventional mystical Christianity. By many, he is considered a Christian author -- in fact, when I first went looking for his books, having heard them recommended, and I called up a whole series of shops, the only place that had them was a Christian book store in Berkeley -- although he is not, I think, regarded in that light by fundamentalists. I don't know if you will like them -- as you are a Calvinist you might well dislike them -- but it might be an interesting exercise for you to read one, just to see how fantasy and Christianity have combined in the work of one author. You can get some of his novels free online from Project Gutenberg.)

 

[Mr Orange]

CONGRATULATIONS TELFORD! (AM I... Excuse me, am I allowed to shout that?)

thanks to everyone that mentioned my story and put it on a list.