Stupid things that won't happen

[The Blackfish]

While roaming around the north, Theon Greyjoy bumps into Osha, wildling and swore protector of baby Rickon. They fall madly in love and decide to return to Winterfell where they rebuild the fallen fortress into a Vegas style wedding chapel. Osha play the organ and Theon fulfils a lifelong ambition to dress up as his hero Elvis Presley ....
Of course the word gets out and all the aforementioned couples now have a place to tie the knot, free from the condeming opinions of their not-so-understanding families.

Thankyou very much ...

 

[Boaz]

they rebuild the fallen fortress into a Vegas style wedding chapel

I almost spit my burrito all over the monitor!

 

[The Blackfish]

lol thanks Boaz !!

 

[Dolorous Edd]

I almost spit my burrito all over the monitor!

Non-ASOIAF related question, but i've always wondered this. What the hell is a burrito?

 

[Boaz]

Burro is the Spanish word for mule, and burrito means little mule.

Burrito as a food is some combination of beans, meat, rice, and cheese wrapped in a tortilla. Burritos come from Mexico, but I doubt that most American burritos resemble authentic Mexican burritos.

 

[AryaUnderfoot]

Non-ASOIAF related question, but i've always wondered this. What the hell is a burrito?

Dolorous Edd, the burrito is God's greatest gift to mankind. Not a day passes that I don't wake up craving one. The American Burrito is the cousin to the Mexican Chimichanga. Both are filled with heavenly goodness and come with a variety of ingredients inside.

I think the one thing that would cause me to hold off on moving to a European country is the lack of Mexican food. It would be almost worse than moving to a country with no beer.

 

[Trey Greyjoy]

Dolorous Edd, the burrito is God's greatest gift to mankind. Not a day passes that I don't wake up craving one. The American Burrito is the cousin to the Mexican Chimichanga. Both are filled with heavenly goodness and come with a variety of ingredients inside.

I think the one thing that would cause me to hold off on moving to a European country is the lack of Mexican food. It would be almost worse than moving to a country with no beer.

I wholeheartedly agree. I dont think my wife would eat if we didnt have chimichangas or burritos.
A burrito or chimichanga can have refried beans, ground beef or chicken inside along with a variety of cheeses, peppers, tomatoes etc. A burrito will have a flour tortilla wrapping, while a chimichanga will be fried inside its tortilla. mmmm best served with spanish rice and refried beans, shredded lettuce, sour cream and guacamole. I bet Gregor wouldnt be so damn grumpy if Westeros had developed the burrito!!

 

[reruth0627]

I would love to see Gregor coming out of a Taco Bell yelling "I'm Full".

I'm with you Arya. I can't go a week without my burrito fix.

 

[donel noye]

old nan decides to go to the wall to visit jon snow because everyone else is sick of her crappy stories,upon her arival she meets measter aemon and they soon fall madly in love. however they dont tell jon and one night after evening meal jon decides to go and see measter aemon. as he enters the measters chambers he hears a faint groan and what appears to be an elephant skin rug moveing and riething, to jons total horror it turns out to be the old couple getting it on with each other, trying not to disturb them due partly to the fact that he figures aemon aint got any in along time and he is to embarrased he tries to quitly leave but nocks over a pile of books on a nearbye table , aemon jumps up shouting who is there is that you clydas you spotty little perv stop lookin at my woman or il feed your testicles to the crows . when old nan tells him it is infact jon snow she then invites young and terrified jon to join them in some weird wrinkley threesome . jon dumbstruck can do nothing but run out of the measters chambers and he decides to return to the great hall to tell his friends what he just saw. lol

 

[Florian the Fool]

Daenerys travels to the far flung and exotic city of Asshai by the Shadow, where a fat and greedy merchant feeds her a strange new food called Bur Ito. Dany enjoys the Bur Ito so much that she gives the fat and greedy merchant all three dragons in exchange for the recipe.

She sails to Westeros, where the massed armies of the seven great houses await her. She rides to parlay under a peace flag, and feeds the lords of the seven houses Bur Ito. The lords are overwhelmed with the wonderous new food, and bend the knee, swearing undying fealty to the Lady of Bur Ito, and peace is brought to the Seven Kingdoms.

But the Bur Ito proves to wreck terrible havoc on the digestive systems of the Westerosi, and soon there are murmurings and threats of open rebellion. But by a strange co-incidence, these same digestive problems prove to be a most valuable weapon against the invading horde of wights and Others, after the teenage Rickon Stark discovers that by bending over near a lit torch and eating Bur Ito, he can create a jet of flame twenty feet long.

 

[Dolorous Edd]

Didn't expect such... emphatic responses.

/me starts backing slowly towards the door.....

 

[AryaUnderfoot]

Didn't expect such... emphatic responses.

/me starts backing slowly towards the door.....

No need to back towards the door, unless you're heading to a burrito joint. But seriously, Dolorous- if you ever make it out to California, let me know. I'll make sure you get a taste. Mmmm, burrito.

 

[Boaz]

Florian, that reminds me of a similar story.

A few years ago in a D&D campaign, one of my companions ordered a sandwich. Well, sandwiches were unknown in that world, so my companion, Garth, described it to the innkeeper who made it to order and made himself one too. The innkeeper loved it and kept gushing about how much neater it was than just grabbing the meat with his fingers. The innkeeper promptly named the new food after my hungry companion. Long story short, we were gone from civilized lands for a year on multiple quests, but when we came back to another inn (hundreds of miles from the first inn) and we sat down for dinner... we were shocked and delighted to know that Garths were all the rage! A great surprise from our DM.

 

[Dolorous Edd]

What have i created! you've all gone food-crazy!

Henceforth this shall no longer be known as the George.R.R.Martin forum! instead it shall be called.....

:drumroll:



The Burrito, Sandwhich and Other Bread/Flour related Produce Forum!

Bow down before it's yeasty mightiness!! etc.

 

[Tyranus]

Spelled sandwich wrong.

*Note: it is spelled correctly in the sentence fragment above.

 

[AryaUnderfoot]

Maybe it's spelled differently in Wales. They're a crazy people. They don't even have burritos.

 

[Dolorous Edd]

Pfft, yeah well, fine. But you yanks can hardly talk. You've butchered the English language, and not just with your silly accents! You don't just invent new words to describe things; you change the meanings of existing words just for the hell of it! I'm sorry, but pants are something you wear under your trousers (unless you happen to be going to a fancy dress party dressed as superman). Then there's all that pronunciation of tomato, and yoghurt and god knows how much other crap. I swear you do it just to confuse us!

Maybe it's spelled differently in Wales. They're a crazy people. They don't even have burritos.

We were only told about electricity 10 odd years ago! The English spent the best part of a century sniggering at us as we trudged up and down the mountains to chop down firewood!

 

[Tyranus]

Don't get me started with the English language, at least we don't add u's to things that don't need it.

 

[Culhwch]

Don't get me started with the English language, at least we don't add u's to things that don't need it.

We didn't add the U's, mate, you took 'em out. Not sure what that says about y'all. Hastiness, or laziness - which is more the virtue?

 

[Florian the Fool]

To quote Eddie Izzard "You say erb, we say herb - because there a ******* H in it"